How to forget a love: tips from an expert to deal with the experience with maturity

Falling in love and living a romance is amazing. However, breaking up with a relationship is a process that can be painful. What’s more, it may happen that you like someone who doesn’t feel the same way. So, how to forget a love? See the tips and explanations given by psychologist Aline Silva.

Frequently asked questions on the subject

A long sigh, a pain in his chest, an urge to send a message. Whether to get over the end of a relationship or an unrequited feeling, self-love and self-care need to be in your bandage box. At the beginning of the process, there are more questions than answers. However, psychologist Aline Silva talks about some questions and clarifies points that can help you at this stage:

Women’s Tips: Is it possible to forget a true love?

Aline Silva (AS): our memory is directly linked to our emotions, so a memory related to love is not so easy to erase. There is a high probability that it will always exist, however, over time, the person may stop feeling the love for the one they had before.

How long does it take to get over a relationship?

It’s hard to set a specific time to get over a relationship. Each one lives the process in a different way, and this resonates in the way of dealing with the experienced moment.

Is it possible to forget a love in 24 hours?

It’s hard to set a time to stop loving someone. Some people continue to love even after many years of ending a relationship. Others can stop loving in a shorter period, however, 24 hours can be considered too short a time for someone who has felt intense and deep love for another person.

Why does unrequited love seem to hurt more?

In these cases, the second person does not correspond to the feeling nourished by the first. Generally, the person is idealized, imagining a hypothetical relationship, without evaluating whether it would really be a healthy relationship. What gets worse is the feeling of rejection, which intensifies the suffering for not having received the attention and love that I would like.

How to forget an unrequited love?

It is important to respect the other person’s choice, as it is not possible for a relationship to be built from an individual intention. It must be understood that each one has her feelings and these must be respected.

You’ve certainly dealt with unrequited love or the end of a relationship. To understand your emotions and resignify feelings, psychotherapy is a great way. In addition, there are some attitudes that you can put into practice on a daily basis. Follow up on the next topic.

10 tips to forget a love

The psychologist brought tips that can help you forget a love. It is worth remembering that this process is individual, each person has their own time, however, it does not have to be lonely. Check it out below:

1. Vent to someone you trust

Silva explained that it is necessary to talk about the moment, to put out feelings and fears. Not dealing with emotions can generate an emotional block. So she recommends looking for a friend and letting off steam.

2. Recognize what went wrong

The relationship probably had some good things, but it stopped working. According to the psychologist, “when we break up, the tendency is to miss the person and focus only on the good times. However, remembering what didn’t do you good helps you realize that things weren’t as perfect as they were marked in memory “.

3. Avoid stalking the person

The behavior is harmful and can hurt you even more. “Don’t search the person’s social media to find out what they’re doing or who they’re with right now. Sometimes it is necessary to silence or block the cell phone to control the impulse to look for her”, commented Silva.

4. Throw away what reminds you of the person

A breakup doesn’t mean erasing the person from your life. However, if that relationship didn’t do you any good, physical objects can become painful memories. So, get rid of “photos, letters, gifts and cards. Messages and virtual photos can also be deleted”, concluded Silva.

5. Seek to take care of yourself and get to know yourself better

Self-knowledge and self-care help to take the focus off the old love and eliminate possible guilt for the end of the relationship. In the case of unrequited love, care and affection strengthen self-esteem. According to the psychologist, you have to love yourself “for who you are”.

6. Have new experiences

Some memories may be related to the old partnership, so it’s worth reframing them. Silva recommends trying out activities, for example, “a course, a sport, a trip or a recipe”.

7. Get out of the house

Take the dog for a walk or go out alone, as long as you visit places that are good for you. The psychologist explained that “you have to leave the house and get in touch with other environments. That way, you will be able to distract yourself and not focus on the relationship that ended or the unrequited love.”

8. Do activities that make you feel good

From physical exercises to that beer with friends. What matters is that you laugh and have fun. Silva stressed that you should “invest your time in pleasurable activities that you enjoy and that are good for you”.

9. Count on friends and family

Closeness to friends and family will help you vent and distract yourself. “Stay close, talk about your feelings and hang out with the people you care about,” recommended Aline.

10. Avoid contact with the person

Not all relationships end with those involved hating each other. In some cases, the breakup is an agreement, and the conversation about feelings not being reciprocated may also have been smooth. Still, “asking the person out keeps the bond active. To avoid this contact, it is often necessary to unfollow the person on social networks”. Over time, friendship may be possible, but respect the process.

These tips can help you forget about someone and remember that you are the love of your life. Therapy is always a possibility, not only to deal with breakups, but for those who seek self-knowledge. Now, if the end of the relationship was sudden and without explanation, the famous ghosting, don’t blame yourself: it says a lot more about the other person than about you.