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How to differentiate sexuality from intimacy?

What is the difference between having sex and making love? What do people actually prefer? Find out in an article that will not leave you indifferent

How to differentiate sexuality from intimacy? Are they different things? Can you have one without the other? Or is one the driver of the other?… Apparently, there are many contradictory opinions regarding the roles of sexuality and intimacy in a relationship and outside of it. But it is difficult to reach definitive conclusions, since no two people have exactly the same views on sex.

In the most traditional aspect, sexuality comes along with a long-term commitment, like marriage. Thus, an intimate and spiritual connection between both is associated with the couple, whose main purpose is to have children, among others.

However, in a society whose thinking is more progressive, The connection between intimacy and sexuality can be very close. Nowadays, popularly, the word intimacy has a strong sexual connotation, although it really encompasses many other aspects of a couple’s relationship.

“There is no love without sexual instinct. “Love uses this instinct as a brutal force, like the brig uses the wind.”

-José Ortega y Gasset-

Intimacy, sex without love?

Intimacy is the core of a strong relationship. This is about getting to know someone deeply, which allows you to be completely free in the presence of that person. This is an emotional state that is usually reserved for one person.

The ideal is the presence of sexuality within a loving relationship as the physical embodiment of intimacy.

However, Sex is also just a physical act.

“In every erotic encounter there is an invisible and always active character: the imagination.”

-Octavio Paz-

The typical one-night stand is a clear example of sex without an intimate relationship.. Men and women can venture into one night, but it is only a physical act. On the other hand, there is nothing more intimate than surrendering to the physical act of sex. So it establishes another type of connection, even in a one-night stand.

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How to differentiate sexuality from intimacy

People separate the term sex from making love. Sex is a physical act without intimacy. However, making love takes into account a degree of connection between both, associated with the physical act. On the contrary, also There are many situations in which the couple is intimate without having sexual relations.. For some, medical problems can prevent sexual relations. However, it does not prevent them from having a loving, intimate and satisfying connection.

Intimacy can be cultivated in many aspects: spend time together, have physical contact such as caresses, kisses… or enjoy common hobbies or listen to each other. Sexuality is just a way of giving and receiving love. And, although it is very important, it is not essential or the only way to develop or express intimacy.

To be intimate with your partner, you must be honest with them and be open, and from there, good sexuality will grow.

The terms of sexuality and intimacy are not timeless, but rather they evolve at the same pace as society does. 50 years ago, these concepts were not linked to the same convictions or traditions as now, because they are changing. And, surely, within a few decades, we will have another different or nuanced consideration of what it means to “make love” or the word “sexual.”

Finally, previous relationships, childhood or adolescent problems and other emotional conflicts can interfere with these connections. When this happens, When any type of obstacle arises, you can resort to couples counseling or therapy. Not only will it help solve the possible problem you have, but it will Your relationship will be deeper and more intimate.

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Although it may seem modest at first to talk about sexual intimacy with a stranger, remember that you are a professional used to resolving these types of situations. And his objective is not to interfere in your deepest life, but to help you have a full sexual life with your partner.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Díaz-Salazar Martín de Almagro, MDL (2016). Psychology of Human Sexuality.Harris, A. (2017). Privacy: The tank in the bedroom. The International Journal of Psychoanalysis (in Spanish), 3(3), 365-381.Zelizer, V. (2013). On the negotiation of intimacy. Ways of understanding the present, 91-104.

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