How to develop a more attractive and charismatic personality

Is it possible to have a more attractive and charismatic personality? It is clear that no one can make a 180º turn in their way of being to suddenly transform into someone completely different. Now, in reality, dimensions such as charisma or the ability to influence others can be trained, awakened and act as a lighthouse to guide and inspire others.

The recently deceased writer PD James said that there are people with genuine charm. And that nuance that so captivates and attracts attention has a secret: authenticity, emerging directly from the heart and without any falsehood. Therefore, one of the keys to enjoying that social glue, that spark that attracts attention and inspires, is to use sincerity.

What is forced creates distance. What starts from falsehood is perceived in the second. In fact, People have an almost infallible detector to identify a false smilethe rehearsed attitude that seeks to attract attention in a declared way… All of these are red points that we must avoid if we want to develop a more attractive personality.

Because attractive personalities exist and have little to do with physical beauty. In reality, there is nothing more attractive than the person who trusts themselves, who transmits positivity and that kind simplicity in which one feels they can trust from minute zero. Let’s delve a little deeper into this topic.

Keys to developing a more attractive and charismatic personality

What really is a charismatic personality? This is, surely, the first question we can ask ourselves. When we talk about charisma we are basically referring to a social skill. It is the ability to attract, impact others and do it naturally, but with enough success (and charm) not to leave anyone indifferent.

Something like this allows us, for example, to improve professionally. Not to mention our social relationships, since charisma allows us to add to our personality that touch of positive enthusiasm with which we can better reach people. In this way, we leave in them that imprint of positive emotions that greatly improves communication, treatment, being able to reach agreements, etc.

If we ask ourselves now if one is born charismatic or if this ability can be trained, the answer is clear: we can all learn to be so. The strategies to develop a more attractive and charismatic personality are not so complex or unknown.

While it is true that more than a century ago, the philosopher and psychologist Max Weber described charisma as a supernatural gift, today that idea has changed. John Antonakis of the University of Lausanne (Switzerland) has been researching this topic for more than a decade. His research work from 2011 Can Charisma Be Taught? Tests of Two Interventions It is one of the best references.

Let’s now find out what areas we should work on.

Enthusiasm and assertive communication

People who love what they do always attract. Somehow, Enthusiasm is related to that idea, to feeling passion for life, for people, for what one believes in. That positive energy wrapped in motivation is one of the best keys to developing a more attractive and charismatic personality.

Another essential competence is added to enthusiasm: assertive communication. We are not looking for that excessive kindness that often cloying. We also don’t need to be funny, overuse humor and jokes to awaken smiles in others. What we want is to demonstrate charisma and charisma contains within it personal security and high resolution.

That is why we must develop adequate assertive communication: speak with confidence, respect and knowing how to defend our own rights.

Self-confidence (but combined with simplicity)

Sometimes, excessive self-confidence can be interpreted by others as a trait of arrogance.. You have to master this dimension very well to avoid falling into excess or narcissism..

The purpose is to develop a more attractive and charismatic personality, but from a healthy, respectful and always humble point of view. This is how true charm comes from: self-confidence and simplicity.

Know how to listen and know how to look

An attractive and charismatic personality is not distinguished solely by good communication skills. Something that defines her is knowing how to listen and understand the art of looking. What do we mean by this?

Those who know how to listen make their interlocutor feel comfortable. It also makes the person in front feel validated, accepted and with the feeling that what they are saying is important and interesting. On the other hand, it is essential to always know how to maintain eye contact. And not only that. We must try to “smile” with our eyes.

To develop a more attractive and charismatic personality you need emotional intelligence

The attractive personality, the one that leaves its mark and is not forgotten, is a great teacher in emotional intelligence. It is, first of all, because it knows how to regulate its mood very well to show serenity, positivity and a friendly attitude. None of this would be possible if one would remain trapped by one’s frustrations, anxieties and fears.

On the other hand, the charismatic person is a great expert in three very specific components of emotional intelligence: empathy, social skills and connection. To leave an impression on someone you have to reach their heart and for this there is empathetic communication, knowing how to recognize emotions in others and make them feel confident.

Don’t be afraid to show your vulnerability

People who make an effort to appear infallible, resilient and tremendously effective do not usually arouse our closeness much. Whoever seeks to be invulnerable distances himself from what is characteristic of the human being., what our essences and emotions are. Therefore, to develop a more attractive and charismatic personality we should not be afraid to show our vulnerability.

That makes us more authentic. Therefore, we do not need to pretend to be something we are not. Left aside is the fear of making mistakes, of getting excited, of falling and failing. The charismatic person is this and much more. He is someone who makes his humanity his banner and covers it with charm, closeness and an always positive attitude.

It is not that difficult to train and awaken this social skill. It is within the reach of all of us to try to create an impact on those around us to leave a mark on their hearts.

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