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How does low self-esteem affect the relationship?

Low self-esteem is an important part of the relationship. It is a dangerous triangle in which only insecurity, mistrust and even jealousy live… Let’s delve deeper into this topic.

If we ask ourselves how low self-esteem affects the relationship, the answer is simple: it has a devastating effect.. To understand it, let’s imagine for a moment a person wrapped in barbed wire. She will not only experience pain every time someone approaches her to hug her; the other person will also suffer.

Nonetheless, One can be involved for decades or even an entire life with that psychological wire around one, suffering the unspeakable.. Fear, insecurity, need to be protected, fluctuations in confidence, hypersensitivity… The psychological dimensions that adhere to the person with a weak and fragmented self-esteem can be very varied, and can in turn be summarized in one: unhappiness.

On the other hand, there is another aspect to consider. Self-esteem problems orbit around a large part of mood disorders. This means that in many cases we have people with anxiety, depression, etc., which can not only give rise to clinical conditions of great helplessness. Sometimes, low self-esteem can also lead to aggression..

Ways in which low self-esteem affects the relationship

Sometimes, a relationship can be made up of three figures. The first two are the people who make up that emotional bond and the third, low self-esteem. It is a disruptive element that can unite or separate the couple. It is a sting that fills those who suffer it with insecurities and suspicions and frustration on those who project it. Because being the partner of someone who doesn’t love themselves causes them to have to make more efforts to extinguish every fear and fill every void.

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On the other hand, it is worth noting that studies on how low self-esteem affects the relationship are always revealing. We know that the satisfaction, stability and quality of commitment between two people depends on the good health of this psychological dimension.. In fact, this is shown by studies such as the one carried out at the University of Basel by Dr. Ruth Yasemin.

However, It is very common to enter a relationship with frayed self-esteem. Either due to a life cycle full of shortcomings in which one has neglected this dimension or perhaps due to the negligence of parents during childhood who did not attend to this dimension. Be that as it may, it is the task of each one of us to work on this area that is so changing and sensitive to our experiences. Let’s now see how low self-esteem affects the relationship.

You don’t feel like you’re good enough for the other person.

When you don’t have a good perception of yourself, you feel at a disadvantage.. In the mind of the person with low self-esteem, harmful ideas of the type abound. “I’m not intelligent enough for my partner,” “I’m not fun and I bore him,” “I’m sure his previous partners were more attractive than me.”

When you do not perceive yourself as valuable to yourself, you do not believe that you are enough for anyone.. Thus, acts of generosity can be interpreted as acts of compassion.

You have difficulty being yourself

Low self-esteem dilutes the sense of self. By not feeling good about who we are, we hide behind other masks to pretend to have virtues that we conceive as more attractive. An example of this is wanting to be as our partner wants. If the other person wants us to be more docile, helpful and dependent, we will end up being so to gratify them.

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Jealousy and insecurity

The person with weak self-esteem is insecure and distrustful. Her mind is filled with worries and convoluted suspicions. The shadow of jealousy follows them almost every moment. They fear that abandonment will occur at any moment. Nothing is as destructive as feeling fallible and inferior to being subject to the constant fear of being betrayed..

Fear of expressing what your needs are

If we ask ourselves how low self-esteem affects the relationship, there is a recurring fact. The person rarely dares to express his or her needs.

They will prioritize those of others before their own so as not to overload, so as not to worry or bother.. After all, within these mental universes, others are more important than oneself…

High sensitivity, everything hurts excessively and everything worries

When it comes to the anatomy of low self-esteem, there is a factor that we sometimes neglect. People with this characteristic are hypersensitive. Every comment from the couple can have a thousand readings for them and, of course, they will interpret them in a negative way. Sometimes even a certain tone of voice can be the subject of desperate concern.

Expressions, reactions and certain behaviors can feel like rejections and you can suffer the unspeakable with them.

How does low self-esteem affect the relationship? The problem of sexuality

Self-esteem and sexuality have a direct relationship. So much so that this bond is usually the source of many problems in the relationship. Insecurity in oneself, the fear of not satisfying others as desired or simply not feeling desirable have a very harmful effect.

Low self-esteem will make you choose the least suitable emotional partners

Sometimes, we may wonder how low self-esteem affects a relationship. However, there is a more decisive prior aspect… In most cases, A fragmented self-esteem will lead us to fall into the arms of the least suitable people.

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The reason? Those who do not appreciate or value themselves long for others to do so (no matter who they are). Walking through life with this need will cause us to be undemanding, to settle for the minimum and to forgive everything in exchange for a bad substitute for love. Thus, it is easy for them to lead to dependent relationships, into ties in which abuse and domination arise.

In conclusion, Nothing is as important for mental health as falling in love every day with that person who is reflected in our mirror.. Valuing, appreciating and accepting that being that we often neglect will guarantee that we stop needing from others what we ourselves should offer ourselves.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Yasemin, Ruth, Erol Orth (2013) Actor and partner effects of self-esteem on relationship satisfaction and the mediating role of secure attachment between the partner. Journal of Research in Personality Volume 47, Issue 1, February 2013, Pages 26-35. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jrp.2012.11.003

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