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How did the myth of the better half arise?

You’ve probably heard that everyone has their better half. But where does this myth come from? Join us to discover it.

The myth of the better half is a deeply rooted belief in our society that suggests that Each of us has an ideal partner destined to complete our being. In this way, it would seem to indicate that true happiness is only possible through the search for that half or soul mate.

To understand the origin of this myth we must go back to ancient Greece, specifically to Plato’s dialogue: The banquet. There the nature of love is investigated and different stories are proposed that explain the behavior of lovers and, among them, that of the better half. We invite you to explore it.

Aristophanes and the myth of the better half

In The banquet, Plato recounts his teacher Socrates’ teachings on the nature of love through a series of speeches. Each of the speakers in this dialogue begins with a praise to Eros, the god of desire, from which the word “erotic” comes.

Among these speeches is that of Aristophanes, who exposes a mythological legend to try to explain the dynamics of love as a couple and the constant search for an other who completes us.

According to Aristophanes, in the distant past, human beings were complete and powerful, round, had four arms, four legs, two faces and a single head. Such creatures could be composed of two men, two women or a man and a woman (the latter called androgynous).

Although they were beings that dominated the earth, their downfall began when they challenged the gods and tried to climb to the sky to fight them. Faced with this rebellion, the king of the gods, Zeus decided to weaken the strength of humans by dividing them in two.

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In this way, each half was left incomplete and longed to reunite with its remaining part to recover its primordial unity and fullness. Aristophanes says that, When they found their half, they gave each other big hugs to try to unite again, although without success.. Therefore, love constitutes the desire and pursuit of that lost integrity.

The function of myth in ancient Greece

Myths played a fundamental role in ancient Greece to transmit cultural values ​​and give meaning to the world. As in other cultures, they were used to explain natural phenomena and the origin of the universe and human beings.

The myth of Aristophanes’ better half follows a basic structure of many Greek creation legends.in which humans are punished by Zeus after committing some offense related, generally, to pride and lust for power.

It is important to highlight that The Greeks did not see myths as fixed and immutable stories, but rather that they could be modified to convey specific ideas.. These were presented as a source of inspiration and philosophical reflection.

There are still debates about whether the Greeks believed in myths or used them as means to express their ideas. Plato is a clear example of the latter case, since, in his dialogues, he uses myths as complements to his reflective arguments.

Socrates’ response to the myth of the better half

The last to present his speech in «The banquet” It is Socrates, who develops the ideas of the priestess Diotima, who according to what he says was his teacher. In this context, it is argued that love is not reduced to simply searching for another person, but rather involves finding beauty.

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According to the Greeks, beauty was linked to both harmony and proportion as well as virtue and moral perfection. The search for love is a path of ascent towards beauty. And as an article in the magazine points out Logoi, For the Greeks, the good and the beautiful constituted two aspects of the same phenomenon.

Thus, Love completes us, but not through another body, but through the feeling of beauty, which fills those who seek it with happiness.. In this discourse, the highest of goods is wisdom. In this sense, philosophers are those inveterate lovers of wisdom who, although they never achieve it, are guided by this inexhaustible impulse.

The myth of Diotima

Although Diotima’s speech also exposes a myth, it is presented as the only one with a philosophical thesis. Unlike the rest, Eros, the god of desire, is not represented as the most beautiful, it is even said that he is not a god, but a mediator between human beings and the gods.

According to the myth of Diotima, Eros was conceived during a celebration for the birth of Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty. During the festival, there was Poros, who represented resources and was the son of Metis, prudence.

After everyone finished eating, Penia, the personification of poverty, showed up to beg. And seeing that Poros fell asleep intoxicated by the nectar, she took the opportunity to lie down next to her and thus conceive Eros.

“By its nature it is neither immortal nor mortal, but in the same day at times it flourishes and lives, if it has abundance and resources, and at times it dies and revives again.”

~Plato~

The nature of desire

Therefore, Eros, desire, is related to beauty since it was conceived at the birth of Aphrodite. However, this has a contradictory nature. Because of his mother, Penia, he always suffers from lack and longs for beauty; Because of his father, Poros, he persecutes the good and is resourceful.

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In this way, the door is opened to think about the double nature of desire, which is never poor or rich, although everything it seeks escapes its hands.

Whenever a wish is fulfilled, a new one will appear that will revive the desire. In the same way, Desire lies between wisdom and ignorance and reflects the philosophical attitude of the constant search for truth.. It is enough to remember the famous phrase attributed to Socrates: “I only know that I know nothing.”

Revisiting the myth of the better half

Although the myth of the better half seems to have a great impact on popular culture, the view that we are incomplete beings who must search for their lost part has several drawbacks. Placing the source of our fulfillment in a single person is dangerous for emotional integrity..

It may happen that said person leaves or dies or perhaps we are alone without any partner. If we think that someone else is necessary to achieve balance and happiness, we can be seriously affected by this situation.

It is true that the couple can be a source of fulfillment and growth, but this must occur between two complete people, in a bond based on mutual complementarity and not dependence. A pair is a set of two elements that have some correlation or similarity between them, not two halves of the same element. A pair is made up of two whole oranges.

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