Does my ex test me by completely ignoring me?: 10 things you should know

An ex ignoring you can mean several things.

Usually, it’s because they really don’t want to keep in touch with you anymore.

But sometimes, when an ex still has feelings for his former girlfriend, cold treatment is a way to check if she still has feelings for him.

If you find yourself wondering why your ex is testing you by ignoring you, check out the reasons below.

Why is my ex testing me by ignoring me? 10 things you should know

1) You want to boost your ego

Many did not like being persecuted. This makes us feel attractive and desired.

There is a chance that this is the only reason your ex is ignoring you, not to test you, but to boost his self-esteem.

But, it may also be possible that he wants you to chase him, because he wants you back.

If he acts out sometimes being in touch and sometimes ignoring you, it’s a clear indication that they enjoy you keeping an eye on him.

In the moments when he ignores you, deep down they are wanting to see how long it takes you to communicate with him.

In this way he gets a lot of satisfaction, seeing the effort you put into contacting him.

If you also want to get your ex back, you can play with him for a while.

But you have to know that, in the long run, this form of gambling is not healthy.

Also, you must be careful that this is not just so that he feels good about himself and nothing more.

2) It is testing your love

If your ex ignores you, it can be a test to see if you still love him or not.

If you stopped trying to get in touch with him, moved on, and started seeing someone new, he’ll know that he’s no longer a part of your life.

But if he still has feelings for you, hope you haven’t forgotten.

He secretly wishes that you are not interested in anyone else and that you too want things to go back to the way they were.

Through his silence, he hopes to find out how you feel about him and if you’re leaving open the possibility of rekindling your relationship.

3) He wants you to feel what it is like to lose him

If your ex is testing you by ignoring you, one of the main reasons is to see how you react to his absence.

He will do this especially if he still has feelings for you.

At first glance they may act cold, but inside they expect you to beg them to talk to you.

He wants you to experience what life would be like without him, and suddenly you come to your senses and run to tell him that you can’t go on like this.

What can you do in this situation if you want him to come back to you?

Send this “no communication” text message:

“You’re right. It’s better if we don’t talk right now, but I would like to eventually be friends.”

You need to send this to your ex at the right time for it to be really effective.

What I like about this message is that you are letting him know that you really don’t need to talk to him anymore. In essence, you are saying that you no longer need it to play any role in your life.

Why is this so good?

Because you are reversing the situation by causing him the “fear of loss”. This could trigger your ex’s attraction to you again.

4) He is waiting for you to admit your mistakes.

Be honest with yourself, are you partly to blame for the breakup in your relationship?

Maybe you just broke up naturally, or maybe your ex broke up with you out of the blue. In which case this might not apply to you.

But if you did something hurtful or put your ex in a position where they felt they had to end the relationship, they may be ignoring you to make you realize your mistakes.

Ignoring you is the equivalent of saying, “I won’t talk to you until you apologize.”

Your ex may think that giving you space and time will help you reflect on your role in the breakup.

Or, he is signaling to you that he feels strongly that you are wrong and that he will not compromise his dignity.

Ultimately, the easiest way for you to figure this out is to admit your mistakes, if you made them. Apologize sincerely and be willing to talk about it.

But if you haven’t done anything wrong, and after deep reflection you really don’t feel the need to apologize, then don’t.

Stand your ground and don’t allow yourself to be emotionally blackmailed into feeling bad about things you didn’t do.

5) It is giving you a little hard time

Your ex could be ignoring you simply to make you feel bad. It’s a bit cruel, but it’s also one of the oldest tricks out there to “tame” your partner.

You see, your ex may have forgiven you for breaking his heart or how the relationship ended, but he’s not ready to tell you just yet.

This could be because:

He has forgiven you and wants to get back together with you once he is done proving the point that you broke up.

He has forgiven you and wants to stay friends, but when the time is right.

He wants to make you nervous and give you time to think things over so that you can appreciate him when he finally comes around.

The silver lining to these points is that he has forgiven you and you can at least try to have some kind of relationship, instead of never seeing each other again. Of course, if you don’t want to get him out of your life forever.

6) He is punishing you

Let’s face it, breakups can be unpleasant sometimes. Perhaps they have exchanged harsh words in the heat of the moment.

If this is what has happened, your ex could be ignoring you to punish you.

I’m sure you’re thinking: “But how childish!” But believe me, more adults than you can imagine act this way when they’re angry.

This is particularly true if your ex likes to get away with the relationship.

For example: he used to shut you up until he got what they wanted, while they were together.

So this could be something you’re doing right now, even though they’re done.

The truth is, being ignored is incredibly painful. Especially when it comes to someone you once had strong feelings for.

It is normal if this:

It lowers your self-esteem It causes anxiety and depression, in severe cases. It encourages your jealousy and your resentment It makes you sad

So think carefully how long you want him to keep punishing you and if he is being unfair.

At some point, you have to forgive yourself and move on, even if your ex never does.

7) He has found love

As hard as this is to take in, your ex may have found love and moved on.

Out of respect for his new partner, he may feel uncomfortable keeping in touch with you.

Or he’s so wrapped up in his new romance that he hasn’t had time to respond to you.

It’s understandably painful to consider, especially if you had hopes of getting back together.

And it would have been good if your ex had told you about it and you didn’t have to be digging to find the surprise.

However, being honest is the harder path to take, and that may be why your ex decided to quietly disappear from the radar.

However, you can’t blame him for moving on.

Instead of feeling rejected, see it as the push you needed to keep going. Who knows, a new love might also be waiting for you around the corner!

8) He is confused about his feelings

You may feel like “my ex has dumped me and ignored me like they said they never would”.

But you should not rule out the possibility that he is confused at this moment.

Going through a breakup is a duel. Even if you are willing to stay in touch with your ex.

The fact that you no longer play the same role in his life means a lot to him.

You may be angry, sad, even relieved or afraid of being alone.

You are most likely experiencing a roller coaster of emotions.

To be honest, it might be a good thing that he took a step back. If you were close to him now, it is likely that you would encounter his emotional turbulence.

It is better that you heal with the support of your family and friends, before attempting a friendship.

And the truth is, everyone needs space and time after a breakup.

People who stayed in contact with their exes for a long time often had a cool-down period where they both healed and then got back together as friends.

9) He is still suffering

Have you ever wanted to stay away from a place, thing or person, just because it brought back memories you’d rather not have?

Your ex could be going through the same thing, forcing him to ignore you.

If the breakup was particularly difficult, or if your partner is still processing the grief, they may not feel comfortable being around you or talking to you.

It may be that he still has a lot of feelings for you, but he knows that getting back together is not the solution.

So to protect themselves they completely ignore you.

We all process heartbreak in different ways.

While some move on quite quickly, others nurse their broken hearts for a long time, before gaining the strength to carry on.

And if you’re around, this could hinder their chances of forgetting you.

On the other hand, if you did something wrong to them, the pain you caused them might have pushed them not to talk to you again.

In this case, it is better to respect their wishes, even if you are truly sorry.

10) You have closed that chapter of your life

Your ex could be ignoring you because they just decided to let you go.

Maybe there are no hard feelings towards you.

Maybe he’s at peace with what happened when they broke up.

But that doesn’t mean they’d like to continue being a part of your life or that you’re a part of theirs.

Many people decide not to keep in touch with an ex, because they want to move on.

They want to leave the past in the past, with the door locked behind them. And even if that’s painful for you, it’s your right to choose who to talk to and who not to.

Maybe there will come a time in the future when you will be more open to keeping in touch.

Ultimately, it is your choice.

Going against his wishes will only push him further away.

3 things you can do if your ex ignores you

Regardless of whether your ex is testing you by ignoring you or just wants to forget about you, there are a few things you can do before giving up completely. This is if you still want to get it back or at least be friends with her.

1) Stop bothering him

There is no way you will get your ex back in the conditions that both of you deserve, if you are chasing him, begging or pleading.

This unbalanced dynamic never works. It gives all the power to your ex and none to you.

In addition, it takes away his respect from you and pulverizes the attraction he feels for you.

The best solution to changing this unhealthy dynamic, and giving yourself a chance to rekindle things in the future, is to stop trying to reconnect with your him.

I understand you, it is normal to feel hurt, alone and miss your ex so much that you would like to stop feeling.

But seriously, let me miss you. Let him deal with her emotions and return to your orbit to his…