Chameleon personality: the ability to adapt to your partner

She is sweet, submissive and leaves all the decisions that have to be made in the hands of her partner.. Not only the most important ones, but also the most trivial ones like the foods to include on the shopping list. Thus she turns his partner into her guide. Whom she follows without hesitation and without reconsidering anything. This is the reality of a chameleon personality.

Those who have a chameleon personality conceive relationships in an unequal way. Someone submits, someone orders. Therefore, Those who enjoy this personality feel lost when they are with a partner who tells them “but, I want to know what you think.” or “it can’t be that we think the same, you’ll have to have your own opinion.”

Today We are going to discover through Samanta’s story what life as a couple is like for someone who has a chameleon personality. We will observe what advantages he obtains in this regard, but also how he loses.

Samanta, the indecisive woman

Since she was little, Samantha was always very indecisive. So much so that she found herself in the position of being with two men she liked, without being able to choose either one. However, something caught her attention about herself. He managed to be a different person depending on who he was with.

Ángel, her lover, was a fan of soccer and extreme sports, so Samanta became a passionate soccer fan and a lover of adrenaline. However, Ricardo, her husband, was a serious, elegant lawyer… Samanta behaved with equal elegance and impeccable manners.

Despite Samantha was baffled by her own transformation., she felt incapable of breaking the relationship with her lover and her husband. However, one day everything changed. Samantha caught Ricardo red-handed with a woman totally contrary to her and therefore, to himself. She was brash and lively.

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Destroyed, fear invaded Samantha. She did not break the relationship but she stopped behaving with Ricardo as she had done until now. She became passionate, daring in an attempt to offer him what she was looking for. With this change in attitude, Ricardo began to distrust possible infidelity. On the contrary, with Ángel she began to behave in a more correct way, looking for stability, something more serious. Angel got bored of her new way of behaving and began to notice other girls.

Samanta chose the only strategy she had always known how to put into practice to make her relationships work. However, in this case, her chameleon-like personality betrayed her. Her world had turned upside down, which is why she changed the roles she had been playing in both of her relationships in order to be successful again. But it does not work

Samantha found herself alone. He had adapted to the personality of his partners, but after the events and his totally unfortunate change, both relationships broke up.. Samantha didn’t understand what happened. His sudden change of attitude caused both of his relationships to end in disaster.

Adapt to your partner’s lifestyle

As we have seen with Samantha’s story, who has a chameleon personality always adapts to the lifestyle of his partner, to his tastes… In short, he hides who he truly is to be who the other expects. However, this has advantages and disadvantages.

The advantage of the chameleon personality is that you get to have a partner with whom you can share absolutely everything.. Do the same activities, think in the same way and understand each other perfectly. Furthermore, since he leaves all decisions in the hands of his partner, the relationship seems to be going great, with harmony.

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The drawback of the chameleon personality is that it will always show a tendency to please and submit to the other person.. He will never take initiative and, furthermore, he will always agree on everything. This type of personality can end up wearing down the relationship and the couple can get tired of this attitude, since if they think the same, if they do not take the initiative, if it seems that they do not have different tastes, the relationship may lose its spark.

The chameleon personality is so adaptive that it completely eliminates the effects of surprise in a relationship.

A couple does not have to have the same tastes, nor be attracted to the same activities, much less have to change their way of being for the other person. The more we are ourselves, the better everything will be.. Also, if we are not compatible, nothing happens. It is better to realize it in time than much later.

Those who have a chameleon-like personality seem to want to find someone like-minded at all costs.. Breaking up or being left without a partner is a great fear for them, which is why they adapt. However, as we have seen, this ends up taking its toll on the relationship.

Naturalness, being yourself and having a healthy self-esteem is very important both on a personal and relational level. If we do not know how to protect our personality and we sell it to the highest bidder, we may have an insecurity problem.