Breadcrumbing: the painful trend of leaving someone without them knowing

William Shakespeare, one of the greatest writers in the history of humanity, stated that ““The wounds that are not seen are the deepest.”. These wounds are precisely the consequence of a way of acting that threatens to become fashionable and that has already achieved a certain popularity, unfortunately. We talk about breadcrumbing.

Sometimes, Human beings are capable of creating really miserable ways of coping or with little consideration. for our nature as beings with feelings.

Some time ago a form of abandonment after one or more dates became popular, the ghosting. It was characterized by creating a void and completely disappearing from the world of the person who was going to be left. Now, it seems that it replaces the breadcrumbing. Let’s know what it consists of.

What is the breadcrumbing?

Especially popular on social networks, this English word comes from the word breadcrumb, which means breadcrumbs. That is, this modality It is put into practice by those people who send the minimum signals to their partner or lover, to know that they are still there, giving hope that the relationship can go further, but knowing that it will never move forward.

As we said, This kind of “technique”, so to speak, was born and grew mainly on social networks. However, it seems to be going further. That is, it reaches relationships where physical dates are established in which the other person is treated with kindness… But without reaching anything concrete.

In other words, as its name indicates, that person leaves “breadcrumbs” creating hope in the other. However, deep down, he knows that the situation will never amount to anything because in no case is the person willing to bet on it, thereby causing considerable pain in the other person, who will end up feeling very frustrated for having tried. everything and not having been able to fix the relationship.

According to experts, such as psychologist Encarna Muñoz, this practice can cause anxiety and pain in those affected. The signals they receive are misleading, so that at all times they have the feeling of doing it wrong, but without knowing why.

How do you know that you are a victim of breadcrumbing?

In reality, this is a form of manipulation. That is why it is important to know if you are being a victim of this type of actions, in order to stop them as soon as possible. To do this, it is necessary to look at the following:

If our partner is a person who is not very concise and clear. Normally, when you propose plans, he gives ambiguous answers such as “we’ll see” or “maybe”, but the concreteness never comes.Gives “signs of life” every so often. That is, you can go weeks without hearing from that person. However, they always leave the door ajar, they end up coming back to look for you, but they never intensify the communication. Generally, seek online interaction and they usually run away from the physical relationship, although this is not always the case. In addition, they create a kind of “tug of war”, a flirtation that serves to keep the other person aware, but they never take the step to go further.They act erratically and incongruously. They can make you feel great, but if you look closely, there are gaps in their behavior. Furthermore, they are specialists in making you believe that these nonsense is your thing.It’s never the time to talk about feelings. Obviously, they are afraid to show their faces, so no matter how much you want to be intimate, it will never be the right occasion. They will make excuses, as they are not seeking to intensify or deepen the relationship.

What to do if you are a victim of breadcrumbing?

It is not always easy to be aware that we are being victims of practices like this. However, if we notice that something is wrong, we can find out if someone is behaving that way towards us. To do this, look at the following:

Analyze the situation objectively. Those who practice this technique manage to make the other person, who is usually insecure, feel guilty. However, it is necessary to analyze the situation as objectively as possible. Does it seem normal to you to hear from your partner only every two or three weeks? That said, Do you really want a relationship where every time something doesn’t add up you feel guilty? Do you think it is normal to have a relationship in which there is little or no intimacy no matter how long it passes? Since you probably respond negatively, you know, you have to step forward and end the situation.Set limits. Even if the other person doesn’t want to be intimate, they speak clearly and set limits. If she still doesn’t react, you already know that you are not having a healthy relationship.

You already know this new form of relationship a little better. If something similar is happening to you, it is very possible that sooner or later you will have to put an end to it or someone else will do it for you. Try to get out of there as soon as possible, otherwise the suffering in these cases can be very great.

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