3 types of friendship according to Aristotle

Aristotle always gave special value to the theme of friendship in his work. For him, it was a valuable asset and an incentive for a happy life. However, he specified that in life we ​​can find three types of friendship, three types of ties where only one could rise to a higher form of relationship, to an exceptional bond far from interest and simple chance.

As is well known, Aristotle was quite a polymath. His knowledge, or rather, his broad curiosity, allowed him to acquire a solid command in areas as diverse as logic, science, philosophy… Thus, something that is undoubtedly very striking when we approach works such as Nicomachean Ethics the thing is described, at that time, the human being as a strongly social creature. He describes us as social animals, where friendship is undoubtedly the most satisfactory form of coexistence.

At the time, the wise Stagirite may not have had access or the possibility to know the mysteries of the brain, but if there is something that modern science has been able to show us, it is that this organ needs social interaction to develop, survive and enjoy in turn. of adequate health. We are undoubtedly social animals, creatures that need strong ties with our fellow humans. However, those links to which we should aspire must be based on a series of pillars.

The three types of friendship that characterize human beings

We often see classical philosophers as this well of respectable but distant wisdom. They are those voices of yesterday that we quote from time to time for informative purposes; but thinking at the same time that many of the things that they left us collected in those ancient legacies have little to do with current needs and characteristics.

Nothing is further from reality. What’s more, in the midst of our existential anxiety, it is really good to meet them again to discover authentic texts of personal growth.

Ethics for Nicomachus is one of them, it is a revealing work on how to achieve happiness and the place that our social relationships occupy in our daily lives. For Aristotlefriendship is an exchange where we learn to receive and give, but far from being conceived as a payment system, we must remember that «It is not noble to be eager to receive favors, because only the unfortunate need benefactors, and friendship is above all freedom. “The most virtuous state of being.”

On the other hand, something that Aristotle explains to us in this work is that there are three types of friendship, which in some way, all of us will have encountered on more than one occasion.

Friendship for utility

It is a type of imperfect friendship, where the two people are not involved out of affection, but because they receive some benefit from the other (such as loans, gifts, favors, etc.). Therefore, they do not last and usually end as soon as the profit is exhausted; for they were not friends of each other, but of their own benefit.

Given these characteristics in this type of friendship, claims towards the other are expected because, using utility, one of the parties demands more and more because they believe they receive less than what they deserve and need.

Aristotle noted that utilitarian friendships usually develop between opposites; for example, between the poor and the rich, between the ignorant and the wise… because one aspires to what he happens to need and offers something else in exchange.

Friendship for pleasure

This is one of the three types of friendship that will undoubtedly be well known to us.. It is an interaction that usually occurs a lot during adolescence and early youth. Later, when we become more selective, cautious and apply appropriate filters, it is common to see this type of double-edged friendship coming.

Now, how does interested friendship differ from that which seeks pleasure? In the first, the person seeks to obtain a benefit, whether favors, access to other people, recognition, etc. In the case of this second dimension, what we aspire to is simply “to have a good time.”

They are people oriented towards that empty and inconsequential hedonism, where they seek to meet with others to share exclusively moments of relaxation, of joyful complicity, of pleasant well-being. And so As soon as the other person needs sincere support, when a problem occurs or when things get complicated, the false friend dissolves. in nothing like a sugar in a cup of coffee.

Friendship for virtue or perfect friendship

Among the three types of friendship that Aristotle defined, there is the ideal, the most solid, the most exceptional but still possible. Is the one where beyond usefulness or pleasure there is a sincere appreciation for the other for who they are.

There is a kind of altruism in that bond where there is no need to profitwhere you simply want to share the good moments, the daily routine and also be that permanent reference to whom you can turn for support.

Aristotle affirms that this type of friendship is rare, since It needs virtuous individuals so that it can occur.. In addition to this, the friend must be liked, have an affinity of tastes and a great knowledge of the other person; all of which implies that you can’t have many friendships of this type.

In other words, Heartfelt friends are rare, they are those references with which to build a sense of intimacy very deep, where we hope not to be betrayed, where experiences, memories and promises are treasured that neither time nor distance can destroy.

The neurology of friendship

Friendship is one of the most studied ways to form bonds in all areas. There has been a lot of rain since Aristotle, but interest does not decrease. In fact, neuropsychology has been no less studying this field, as demonstrated by the study you have described below.

This scientific article, published in 2018, discovered that close friends had similar patterns of neural activity when presented with the same video. Therefore, brain activation is a useful way to know who is really similar to us or, in other words, belongs to the ideal type of friendship that Aristotle described.

In conclusion, It is very possible that many of us currently have the three types of friendship described by Aristotle: people who want something from us; friends who only look for us to share moments of fun; and exceptional people who are there through thick and thin. Friends that we wouldn’t change for anything and that make this life a more bearable and interesting journey…

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