11 Everyday Situations Where It’s Not Worth Helping Others

It is scientifically proven that the human being has altruistic characteristics. That’s why we almost always think about helping others, even when it might harm us.

O awesome.club does not fully agree with this approach and recognizes that there are situations in which doing someone a favor can not only be useless but also harmful to both parties. There are some cases where it is not worth offering help. Check out what they are.

You have probably already been in a situation where someone has asked for help related to your professional activity. In these cases, many people think, “It costs nothing”. This often happens with artistic works, such as those of painters, designers, photographers and even journalists.

A free help not only devalues ​​your knowledge (acquired over years of study) and your skills, but also means a loss of money for a colleague in the profession, who could be earning something if they were working with that same client.

The author of a popular article entitled Why I stopped helping people and why I recommend you do the same Cammi Pham says it’s best not to offer help if you don’t know how to do the job properly. To make this clearer, she told the following story.

Her parents went abroad and asked her to take care of their plants. However, Cammi wasn’t very good with plants and ended up overwatering some and drying out others. According to her, if she had told her she couldn’t help, her parents would have found someone else to do it and nothing wrong would have happened.

Friends who always need something and family members who live on the edge of their financial means until the day they get paid: it’s important to say ‘no’ to these people. They are so used to living with the help of others that they simply don’t make the effort to change and improve their own budget.

Many people even turn down better jobs because they have the false sense that they already earn enough. You should stop spending money on people who don’t respect you.

Toxic charity is one that does not aim to help the needy, but to satisfy the ambitions of thieves who take advantage of the good faith of others. This charity can be identified by the absence of evidence and the presence of fake volunteers.

We must not give in to seeing touching photos and quickly transferring a large amount of money. In this way, you can not only help no one, but satisfy people who take advantage of others’ misfortunes both emotionally and financially.

Many psychologists recommend not helping a person until they ask. In some cases, the desire to support a person is actually a great need to feel that someone needs you or to look better in the eyes of others. By doing this, you are not helping anyone.

Karpman’s dramatic triangle is a social and psychological model of relationships between people described by psychiatrist Stephen Karpman. According to him, a person can act in one of three pillars: victim, harasser or rescuer. The objectives of the latter are the least obvious.

At first glance, it might seem that you want to help the victim and that you are doing your best to do so. However, in reality, the savior has ulterior motives. For example, he might like to feel that someone depends on him or that someone trusts him. In such cases, help is just a possibility to fulfill a personal wish.

When a person overcomes himself, he acquires experience. The same is true when we build up immunity to a disease. If you don’t let the other person solve their own problems independently, that person will not be able to handle the same situations in the future. Helping someone doesn’t mean doing the whole job. You can facilitate, but not take on the whole task for yourself.

Of course, each situation is unique. However, it is very common for parents to try to solve and do everything for their children, from choosing food to school chores. A child who is educated like this ends up having a lot of difficulty making decisions in the future. She cannot perceive situations autonomously and this also influences her relationships as an adult.

It is important for parents to set examples for their children and teach them how they need to behave in each type of situation. At the same time, it is not right to deny all kinds of help, especially when the child has a lot of difficulty. It is important to find a middle ground so that self-confidence is not so damaged.

Helping a child with everything and constantly leads to another problem. If she doesn’t learn to deal with difficulties on her own, she doesn’t understand a basic rule of life: that not everything goes as we want. And that can lead to a lot of frustration in the future.

Situations like this occur when reality expectations and desires don’t fit the possibilities or what is happening at a given moment. This can cause stress, irritation and even depression.

We often help someone because they are our friend or someone who has helped us in the past. However, some experts recommend not paying attention to what has already happened, but looking to the future. That is, helping the person to accomplish a goal. That way, the help will be more useful and can be channeled to the results.

This may seem strange, but more and more experts are recommending not giving gifts to children living in orphanages. Often this makes them not know how to value what they have. Also, it can lead to conflict and problems in later life.

It is best to give these children your time and attention. However, some objects can be useful, such as school supplies, for example.

In what situations do you think it is not worth helping others? Tell in the comments.