10 Situations in which it is difficult to understand and forgive a man

We all have problems and disagreements in our romantic relationships. We often ask ourselves questions like: “Will my partner change? And tomorrow, won’t it be even worse?” In our minds and hearts, contradictory questions are repeated. In these moments, a serious assessment of the reality in which we are living becomes necessary. In this article, you’ll find tips on how to handle these conflicting situations.

First, eliminate feelings of confusion and the desire to escape from problems. Remember that you must make an important decision that will change the course of your life.

O awesome.club invites you to think seriously about how you might act in situations that often lead only to arguments or, in the worst cases, can lead to emotional problems.

Arguments and disagreements in relationships are perfectly normal. All people are different and sometimes the perception of the same situation simply differs. If your partner doesn’t like you taking too long to get ready to go out, or isn’t comfortable with a joke that was harmless to you, that’s okay, that’s completely natural. Arguing is unpleasant, but it is always possible to resolve it. Don’t be afraid to be the first person to try to make amends, and don’t be afraid to speak up right away about what’s bothering you. It is better to have a constructive conversation, so that each one understands which limits should not be crossed and so that it is possible to learn and understand the reasoning and perception of the other. A strong relationship is the result of working together.

But some situations shouldn’t even be forgiven, let alone perpetuated and endured. If your partner hits you, there’s no excuse for that. Many women suffer aggression for a long time and adopt a completely absurd attitude, as if “they provoke” their violent husbands. If your partner believes he has the right to be a cruel dictator, that he can beat you for some “bad deed”, the best thing to do is to end the relationship immediately. Bruises go away, but psychological trauma can last a lifetime. Don’t be afraid to be alone, it’s best to seek help and support from family, friends or social organizations with experience in these cases.

Has this situation ever happened to you: your interlocutor was joking and started laughing out loud, while you were still trying to understand where the fun was. Yes, the sense of humor is also different for each of us, and sometimes it can be very specific. If you don’t think it’s funny to watch the animated series the simpsonsfor example, and your partner laughs when he watches, well, you might need to look for a comedy where the two of you can laugh together.

But certain types of “humor” cannot be justified, especially if your partner laughs at jokes that offend other people, whether for sexual, racial, social reasons, jokes about mutilation or illness. It is worth trying to explain to him that such jokes cause even more hatred and intolerance in the world. By encouraging this type of “humor”, the person increases discrimination against certain segments of the population. However, the example must come from ourselves. It’s not a good idea to laugh at sexist jokes, for example, and then wonder why men don’t respect women.

If your partner shows that he is a person who needs to laugh at these people, it will be very difficult to change him. In these cases, it’s very rare that you can get him to notice and behave differently if you don’t understand that this attitude is unhealthy and you’re willing to change.

If your partner picks you up at work and offers to accompany you home after an appointment, then you can rest assured because he is the type who cares about you and your well-being.

But if he is the type that forbids you to go out with your friends or other people without him being present, if he asks for a detailed report of your activities when you are at work or alone at home, he wants the passwords of your social networks to be able to control who you interact with, this is already a type of manipulation and, obviously, psychological violence. Total control is a clear desire to suppress your desires. Phrases like: “I do this for your own good” or something similar only disguise an action full of enormous repression. Not having time for yourself and not having your personal space leads to stress and often the desire to get out of that situation: drowning in alcohol, suppressing emotions, or other ways that only cause more damage.

Jealousy, in its varying degrees, is inherent in each of us. If your partner has friends and colleagues with whom you maintain a friendly relationship, that’s no reason to think he might be unfaithful. If this kind of friendship bothers you, it’s important to be honest and open up, without the need to start a fight. Suggest a casual dinner with his friends or a date at a restaurant. Most likely, he won’t mind because it’s wonderful when we have a lot of friends and everyone maintains a good relationship with each other.

However, it’s best to be alert if your partner hides his contact with other women, constantly diverts the conversation when you bring up the subject, or reacts violently to questions about your female friends. If he doesn’t want to introduce you, they might not know you exist.

Things are like this: when they were little, many men were not used to taking care of domestic affairs. It is possible that you do not know how to cook, do not have the habit of washing dishes or do not know how to use a washing machine. If you’re too tired of having so much housework, try to come to terms with sharing these responsibilities with your partner, dividing up the tidying and cleaning tasks as needed.

But if a man openly says that cleaning, cooking, or helping with household chores is none of his business and complains about tidying and cleaning the house, then maybe you need to start worrying. The argument that “his place is in the kitchen” is completely insane, as well as sexist and disrespectful. Women have struggled a lot to leave this gender stereotype in the past. Most likely, he sees you as an object and not a companion.

Human beings are fragile and it is very easy to hurt our feelings. Sometimes, after a fight or disagreement, the offense may have been very painful and the person needs some time to “digest” it or needs to be alone. However, at the end of the day, when we truly love someone, we are able to overlook these annoyances, especially if the person who offended us contributes to it. Dedicate a little more time to expressing your feelings and helping your partner through difficult times. Remind them that human beings are prone to mistakes and that everyone offends and is offended, but this should not become routine and the important thing is to always seek to be better.

But if offense and hurt are constantly present in the relationship and talking no longer solves it, it is possible that you are involved with a manipulator and a psychological abuser. Especially when the offense comes with a “punishment”: the refusal to give affection, for example, because “you don’t deserve it”, using the “silent treatment”, forced sexual abstinence and other actions of this kind. Respect yourself and don’t confuse a person’s fragile soul with the violence exerted by them, whatever the type. No one should even think they have any right to punish you.

Many people want to hear words of love and tenderness daily. But some men are not very capable of expressing their feelings. Don’t worry, it could be a question of upbringing, attitudes that come from childhood or due to peculiarities of their personalities. Remember that love is not measured or formed by words, but by actions. There are many ways to show love, not just words: pay attention to feelings, touch, affection, attention received, help given, and other similar attitudes.

But if a man, in addition to not showing his feelings, also humiliates you when they are alone or, worse, in the presence of others, this cannot be justified as “personality characteristics”. When he insults or underestimates you in the presence of your friends or tells a story you are ashamed of, says that you are not able to face your “problems” or perform your tasks correctly, it is a direct depreciation of your image, manipulation and psychological violence.

We all go through difficult times. Often, all we need is to take a break from our chaotic routine and spend a week or even a little longer, so we can rest and organize our thoughts.

But if a person continues to suffer for months or even years after being laid off, for example, or does not do any housework and spends all day at the computer, then it is worth paying more attention to these attitudes and opening your eyes to what really matters. is happening. Maybe your partner is suffering from severe depression, needs the help of a specialist and, of course, you need support to overcome this crisis. But make no mistake: it can also be laziness, narcissism and even parasitism.

Some men rarely call for the first time and don’t always propose a date. There are those who don’t like to talk via text or social media. If you go through this, you may have known an introverted man or just a shy person when it comes to showing your feelings. A good solution would be to talk openly about it. You can break this barrier by saying that you enjoyed your time together, that you like him, and that you would be happy to see him more often so you can talk more. If this man likes you, he will be happy to step forward or explain the reasons for his behavior. Maybe he’s really too busy with work.

But if the conversation doesn’t lead to anything, he probably doesn’t consider this relationship serious. So, don’t forget to think about yourself: is it worth it to wait anxiously for a call and change all your plans to have some wonderful moments, when he’s finally willing (and available) to propose a date for two?

Sometimes a man doesn’t really understand why you need a new dress when you already have five others hanging in your closet. Yes, and the current economic situation may not allow you to buy something of higher value or your partner to give you an expensive gift. In these cases, there is no need to be upset or offended, but rather to fight together so that they can achieve…