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10 Signs Your Ego Is Making Decisions for You

The ego is an essential part of our lives. It is useful in childhood, when we build our personality, define our interests and evaluate where we want to go and what our limits are. As time passes, the ego is transformed, and even diluted. But what happens when we grow up and the ego doesn’t take on the right proportions?

Some people say that an exaggerated ego is like excessively high self-esteem, but that’s not always the truth. Many people try to compensate for insecurities by creating thoughts about themselves and comparing themselves to others, in a kind of defense mechanism. But this can affect social life and hinder maturation as a human being.

O awesome.club brings, below, tips for you to know how to identify the warning signs that indicate that your ego may be affecting your social life.

1. Having the need to dominate conversations

During meetings with relatives or friends, are you always the center of attention? So it is very likely that this is because your ego is controlling the situation. The search for the approval of others can make us want to demonstrate that we know more or that we deserve the spotlight in every conversation. People like that think others are just there to serve as an audience.

Tip: Do an experiment. The next time you’re in a meeting or starting a conversation, ask others questions, allow others to respond, and listen. You’ll find that you don’t always have to be the main star to enjoy a good chat.

2. Face the opinion of others as if it were an attack

We all have our egos and our opinions, built on our personal history and ideas. When we allow our ego to grow too large, we are less likely to accept other points of view. Because? Because, deep down, we feel insecure and tend to see opposing opinions as personal attacks, not just opinions.

Tip: Always remember that opinions are framed by other people’s parameters, not your own. Knowing how to listen is a show of kindness, but it is recommended to keep in mind that opinions reflect points of view and do not necessarily mean an attempt to attack you.

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3. Avoid contact with anything that is too “different”

We human beings have a tendency to associate with people who have similar views to ours. But it is also inevitable that we come across those who have ideas, tastes and behaviors that do not coincide with those we have. Limiting your social circle to only the people you are used to, avoiding everyone who is unknown, can be a sign that your ego has some kind of fear of getting hurt in the face of what it doesn’t know.

Tip: From time to time, try to spend time with people who have different opinions than you, in order to face this insecurity. Be friendly and relax. Just because an individual has interests different from ours doesn’t mean we can’t have fun in their company.

4. When someone tells a story, insist on giving your own version

Not all attitudes stemming from an exaggerated ego are deliberately malicious. There’s a fine line between empathizing and feeling the unconscious urge to give your own version of a story you’ve just heard. This is especially clear when someone makes an effort to make their version seem more important than the other person’s. Have you ever caught yourself doing this more than once? It is a striking symptom.

Tip: When you realize that you feel like telling a story better than the other one, ask the interlocutor to give details of his story and ask questions about it. Be grateful for the details and for the fact that the person was willing to share it with you.

5. Not being in the habit of helping others

Don’t remember the last time you offered to help someone? So this could be a sign. People with very high egos tend to think that they suffer more than others or that their problems are always more serious. The feeling of insecurity makes them question their own usefulness to others. Therefore, they are not likely to offer help.

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Tip: Mark any day of the week on your calendar. At some point during that day, find someone who might need your help, and show that you’re available for it. Solidarity improves our self-esteem, stimulating a sense of well-being.

6. Thinking that everyone is happier than you

They say that “the neighbor’s grass is always greener”, and that with a simple look it is possible to see a small part of the reality experienced by other people. The part we see is the part that others choose to show us, which is certainly the most pleasant and the part that makes people proud of themselves. When we have an imbalance between self-esteem and ego, it is normal for us to see the feeling of well-being that we were unable to achieve at that moment passing right before our eyes.

Tip: Don’t compare yourself to others. Each person has their own joys and sorrows. Perhaps the other is also struggling with something inside. Identify what the positive aspects of your current situation are and learn to benefit from them.

7. Constantly feeling misunderstood

It’s normal to feel misunderstood by the world from time to time. However, finding that there is no one capable of understanding how you think, feel and behave, can point to an excess of ego. To identify this “symptom”, you need to pause and rethink your interactions with other people. If you feel uncomfortable or isolated in most of your relationships, it’s time to make changes.

Tip: Excessive ego and insecurity can lead us to very stressful situations. Do relaxation exercises and try to find common ground with other people. This will allow you to identify with them more easily.

8. Thinking you have the solution to everyone’s problems

The ego helps a lot when we need to overcome difficult situations, giving us a broad and optimistic vision to find solutions. However, when this feeling goes beyond the limits and we interact with other people, it is as if their problems are smaller when seen through our eyes. That is, we try to solve the other person’s issue by presenting solutions that seem obvious to us, or else we think we could do better than the other.

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Tip: Everyone knows the peculiarities of their own problems. Don’t underestimate the ability of your relatives or friends to overcome obstacles. Often, when people share their experiences, they do not want the interlocutor to present a magic formula, but only to know how to listen.

9. Make sure you have a big mission in life

There are those who believe that each person has a mission to fulfill in the world. But this could be a sign that our ego is overblown. We miss opportunities because we only see the big goal at the end of the path, without being willing to go through it. This can affect our professional and personal lives in the long run.

Tip: Enjoy the little things in life. Opportunities to achieve your goals and feel satisfied with your purpose in life come one step at a time, with discipline and noticing what opportunities are there for you to take advantage of.

10. Finish the sentences of the people you talk to

A characteristic trait of people with exaggerated egos is that they think they know everything. In these cases, the instinct to complete the sentences of the people with whom we talk arises, as the owner of the inflated ego believes he knows what the other will say next. Sometimes the prediction may even be correct, but if it is wrong, you will never know.

Tip: Pay attention to your surroundings. Perhaps what you believe the person means is not reality. As obvious as it may seem, trying to guess the thoughts of others is not just rude, but also a limitation that prevents you from learning new things.

How do you think the ego affects our everyday life? Did you identify with any of the above points? Leave your comment!

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