10 ideas to bring “50 shades of grey” into your bedroom

“50 Shades of Grey”: lately it’s been hard not to hear about the erotica bestseller. The book, which is a worldwide success and has already had its publishing rights sold in more than 37 countries, tells the story of an innocent young woman who ends up involved with a millionaire with unconservative sexual habits. While the movie based on the book doesn’t make it to the big screen, how about bringing the concepts of the work to the moments for two?

1 – Be confident!

The great difficulty in including the book’s ideas in your sex life is letting go. Self-esteem and self-confidence are essential for the mission, which involves concepts such as the power and sensuality of controlling the other.

If you don’t feel ready to interact, train. Try wearing sexy lingerie and looking in the mirror. Then, bring something purchased for the occasion, such as a handcuff, for example. The important thing is to gain confidence for when the game involves your partner.

You need to have fun with the situation, or it will have the opposite effect as intended and, instead of spicing up the relationship, will make the attempt embarrassing for you and your partner.

2 – Go shopping

Much of the fun is in the objects you can use. Go shopping without prejudice and bring home handcuffs, whips, ties, massage oils and any other “equipment” that can help at the time of action.

Also invest in fetish lingerie (those that you blush just looking at the store) and very sensual. The look counts a lot – and it can be the icing on the cake, especially for men, for whom this type of stimulus is a great warm-up.

3 – Appreciate the slowness

Do everything va-ga-ro-sa-men-te. Touch your partner in a gentle way, slowly covering the entire length of their body. Ask him to do the same.

Then use the same procedure with the kiss. Try to feel each other’s breath before actually initiating the kiss and do this when kissing the other parts of the body.

4 – Tie (or let yourself be tied)

Some people are more comfortable being the ones who “command” their partners, while others prefer to be guided. Arrange with your partner so that you both feel completely safe and satisfied. Nothing worse, at this moment, than the fact that one of the two is uncomfortable.

Start by tying just your wrists the first time. Then, as you loosen up, let your imagination run wild.

5 – Know how to provoke

With your partner properly tied up, start with a good massage with special oils. Focus especially on the so-called erogenous zones, applying light pressure and then relieving it. Make sure the movements you choose are pleasurable, not uncomfortable. Ask him if he wants to continue and, if yes, refuse to do so, in order to maintain “authority” over the cat and continue the game.

6 – Let your fantasies out

This is a good time to release secret desires, as both of you are now feeling more uninhibited with each passing second. Play a character – you can be the bossy boss or a stranger who only wants you for one night. Remember that as long as you both feel comfortable, anything goes.

7 – The spankings

If you’ve joined the game, you should be completely sure what you want to experience. Doing things just to satisfy your partner is the shortest way to ruin the mood and the fun.

Choose the object you think is most appropriate (whip is a good example, but there are other options if you want to vary). If you prefer to start slowly with the experience, try tapping with your palm.

A classic place for spankings, the butt is both conservative and extremely sensual. Perfect for a beginner. Try not to hit the same area for longer than ten minutes so you don’t leave marks and stop immediately if you notice that the area is getting too red.

8 – Use your voice

At the same time as you knock, try to use your tone of voice in your favor, pronouncing command words or phrases to your partner. If you think he is not behaving as he should, let him know that you will be punished. All the fun of the game is in acting, in fact, like the dominatrix to whom the subordinate owes respect. Don’t give up if, the first few times, you feel a little “silly”; practice also helps to get in the right mood.

9 – Get ready to move forward

Now that you’ve started in the dark world of sadomasochism, it’s time to try to get a little further into this vast territory. Objects like nipple clamps may seem overdone at first, but they become quite natural over time.

It is important to know how to dose the time of use of each “toy”, since some are more painful than others. Keep up to date on the pain they cause and don’t overdo it.

10 – Respect the safety rules

In order for you and your partner to fully enjoy the benefits of sadomasochism, you need to set rules that, whatever happens, must be followed to the letter. This practice should not encourage violence or exaggerated physical aggression.

Agree on a code of conduct and stick to it. Also avoid dangerous games like choking and never try to use the techniques when one or both of you are drunk.

Knowing your limits and your partner’s limits, the experience only adds to your sex life. What are you waiting for? Go shopping and have fun!