When priorities are clear, decisions are easier

When you are clear about your priorities, the decisions you make are much easier. It is like separating the branches of a dense forest in order to remember where our roots are, those that nourish our self-esteem to know what and who we have left, to act without fear and always according to the voice of our own heart.

This idea, which on the surface may be more than obvious, actually contains certain nuances on which to reflect. We live in a world where there is a dimension that conquers territories with the feet of a giant: hopelessness. This emotion that often precedes a depressive state where the person completely loses control of their life. It is like a thorn that digs into us until it leaves us breathless.

This emotional weakness originates when we begin to question the decisions made throughout a period of our lives. Why would I invest so much time and effort in people who then betray me? What is the reason I worry so much about performing in a job where I am not valued? Why wouldn’t I have listened to my intuition at that moment and left when I had the chance?

Hopelessness or disillusionment with life causes dissatisfaction, and dissatisfaction causes the gradual loss of control over one’s life. These are moments in which we come to think that “No matter what you do, nothing will change.”. Now, far from allowing ourselves to fall into this ominous void, we have the opportunity to assume this moment of personal crisis for what it is: a turning point in our lives.

It is an ideal moment to find new meanings, to self-explore our inner universes in search of that which gives strength, encouragement and courage to our identity: priorities.

We suggest you reflect on it.

Priorities, demands and the emotional brain

One of the biggest problems we have today is our difficulty in separating our own priorities from the demands of the environment. It is not at all about rejecting some to exclusively embrace the others. No one can go through the world prioritizing themselves and ignoring what work, family or the rest of our environments demand of them. In reality, the key is to maintain a wise, harmonious and firm balance.

Prioritizing is knowing how to decide

If we dedicate all our time to meeting other people’s demands, we will neglect ourselves and distance ourselves from that center of power, which is a delicate core to care for and listen to every day: ourselves.

Psychologist Albert Bandura said that people who learn to take control over their lives feel more satisfied. That is the key, taking control by learning to decide better and remembering what our priorities are.To achieve this we must learn to clarify what is important to us.That is, no one can ask me for anything that goes against my values, that violates my self-esteem or that affects my physical or emotional integrity.

Having this clear, In our day to day life we ​​will always make decisions that follow this same line: that of our own heart or more than our heart, our emotional brain.. However, how to achieve it? To better understand how we can achieve this, it is worth first delving into the brain mechanisms that accompany any decision-making.

Emotional neurons and decision neurons

According to a study published in the journal “Nature Neuroscience”, The brain structure that orchestrates our decision making is the orbitofrontal cortex. This work yielded useful and very interesting information: two types of neurons with a very specific function are concentrated in this structure.

OFC neurons

The first are the OFC neurons, whose function is to offer emotional value to each option that we must evaluate before making a decision. They do it based on our previous experiences. Also to our identity and our personality. It is like a prior mechanism that is directly linked to what we call “intuition”.

For example: Something tells me that I should reject that job offer, because I know that it requires certain skills that do not suit my character.

Value cells

The second group of neurons are value cells. Here there is no longer an emotional component, rather a practical attribution is applied. In this case it would be: “I have to accept that job because I need a salary, because returning to the job market is a priority right now.”

Once the person makes a decision based on these two mechanisms, the emotional and the attributional value component, the orbitrofrontal cortex assigns a new emotion to that option made. The purpose is simple: The brain tries to motivate us at all times to succeed in that objective, in that demand.

The need to have clear priorities to make safer decisions

Something we all know is that in this life you have to take risks. There will be more successful decisions and others that will be less so. However, sometimes, what seems crazy to us at first ends up being the most logical and successful option of our existence. With all this what we mean is something very simple. Q To be happy you have to make decisions and be responsible for them at all times.

The feeling of hopelessness -cited at the beginning of the article- It is resolved precisely by connecting with our interior and bringing our own priorities to light, those that nothing and no one should boycott. To achieve this, it is worth taking into account 3 simple strategies.

Reduce

List all your present needs on paper. You will realize that there are many, however, among all of them are the true priorities: being happy, being respected, being physically and emotionally well… Reflect on them.

Compare

Once you have clarified your priorities, compare them with the demands of your environment. Are they in harmony? Is something demanded of you that goes against your values? Is there a person who alters your emotional health?

Consolidate

Now that we have become fully aware that there are certain aspects that go against our priorities, there is only one thing left. We must act to consolidate this balance between internal priorities and external demands.

Finally, Once we have completed these steps, we only have one last detail left. You have to draw up a life plan. Because if there is something that being very clear about our own needs, our own values, dreams and hopes offers us, it is to show us that we can and must be masters of our destiny.

When one is finally very clear about what one wants, the adventure of life begins again.

You might be interested…