Tips to be a more loving person

Showing affection may come naturally to some, but maybe not to you. It is normal that personality or your own shyness prevents you from doing so. Even so, The lack of affection makes it impossible for you to connect with other people, even though you love them. Therefore, if you are looking to be a more loving person, we invite you to read this article.

Next, we will give you some keys to implement in your daily life. It doesn’t matter if you find it difficult to do them at first, the essential thing is that you try and, day after day, put them into practice to progress in your relationships. Let’s go there!

What does it mean to be loving?

Being affectionate implies, broadly speaking, communicating affection to others. Although it is linked to love, both feelings have their differences. For example, affection is usually more related to its demonstration, while love implies a more transcendent bond.

Affection develops from childhood and is associated with the way of upbringing. In this sense, the way in which parents or caregivers establish the bond with their babies develops a type of attachment, secure or insecure, that will influence close relationships for the rest of their lives, according to the magazine Annals.

Thus, you will be able to communicate more or less affection to others depending on how your attachment developed during your childhood. However, it is also important to highlight that Not every affection you transmit will make you a more affectionate person. That is, it is possible to express affection without really feeling it or only because you are looking for something in return.

Some of the ways of expressing affection include showing it through verbal or non-verbal language, with the use of facial expressions, touch and proximity of the body. Likewise, it is possible to communicate affection through active listening and empathy.

Communication Monographs mentions in an article that emotional communication through any of these forms includes the expression of feelings of closeness, affection and affection for others. It is important that you experience that emotion by giving it to others. In this way you will be able to obtain some of the great benefits that affection has, as we will indicate to you shortly.

Benefits of being a more loving person

This communication of affection in all its forms not only helps improve relationships, but also promotes your health. Although it may seem strange, Being more affectionate can increase your happiness and self-esteem, as he points out Oxford Research Encyclopedia of Communication.

At the same time, those who demonstrate affection are less likely to overreact to stressful events. And, relatedly, they are able to recover sooner and relax when giving or receiving affection.

For all this, it is possible that being a more affectionate person and demonstrating it through adequate emotional communication provides greater well-being, both for you and for others. In conclusion, less stress, depression, anxiety, social problems, insecure attachment, sleeping difficulties and even physical problems, such as pain.

How to be more affectionate?

Your shyness or your personality, due to your attachment style, may prevent you from being a more loving person. If you consider that these are the possible causes, we suggest working on it in therapy. This way, you will be able to detect what stops you from expressing your feelings. Besides, Providing affection has the advantages that we mentioned. Therefore, it is worth trying.

Added to this, many times small acts are enough to express what you feel for others and for them to believe it too. For all these reasons, we invite you to read the following tips so that you can put them into practice with those around you: partner, friends, family or acquaintances.

1. Provide physical contact

Physical contact is, perhaps, the most common way to express affection. There are different types of contact; In this sense, it is only affective if it is intended to communicate love or affection to others.

This way of showing affection has benefits for the health of those involved in it. As argued by a study of Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, Affectionate contact is very important to strengthen social ties. Whoever receives it may feel greater satisfaction in relationships, security of attachment, and regulation of emotions.

Giving a hug, holding hands, caressing a loved one or kissing them are ways to show that affection and support. He tries to practice them frequently, not only in moments of intimacy and happiness, but also in tense situations or fights. In fact, on these last occasions, contact tends to reduce stress levels.

Despite all this, you must also be able to recognize discomfort. There are certain situations in which others do not want you to touch them or do not share the necessary trust to do so. They may have their reasons. Therefore, try to use physical contact when you are sure that it does not bother you.

2. Practice active listening

Communication is one of the basic needs of any relationship. To do this, you need a person who knows how to listen and another who feels heard. It is not enough to just listen to others. Also It is necessary to understand their messages, be more empathetic and get involved.

Active or empathetic listening is one of the qualities you can practice to be a more loving person. If a loved one has a problem and seeks your help, the way they will feel your affection is if you pay attention to them. Try the following tips when talking:

Do not interrupt or change the subject. Ask how the person has been, how it went, etc. Speak with a warm tone of voice, with kindness and respect. Try to maintain a body posture that is directed at the person speaking. Rephrase what they say or do to you. pertinent questions.Maintain eye contact with the other person while speaking.Do not give simple thanks or advice. In fact, a study of International Journal of Listening It highlights that those who receive responses of this type feel less understood than with active listening responses.

3. Express affection through words

As we mentioned before, You can use verbal communication to show your feelings towards others. For example, when saying “I love you”, “I love you” or “you are very special to me.” Also, expressing that you miss them. Sometimes, a “I miss you” is just as powerful as a phrase of love.

At first, you may find it difficult to say it in person, so you may choose to send messages through social media. Both the use of oral language and written language makes the other person feel more loved and closer to you.

4. Be attentive to details

Not paying attention to others is one of the worst things you can do if you want to be more loving. How many times has it happened to you that you don’t realize something because you are absorbed in your thoughts? It is very likely that, in these circumstances, others will tell you: “You never pay attention to me.”

Make an effort to remember those data that they communicate to you, no matter how small they are. For example, birthdays, anniversaries, activities or events that others have, or anything you know they care about.

If you suffer from poor memory, you just have to use an agenda or your cell phone itself. There is no more loving act than taking an interest in those things that matter to others. You will see that once you start implementing it, your relationships will improve.

5. Give small acts of love

The details are very important. By this we don’t just mean being attentive to small aspects that are relevant to others, as we mentioned before. We talk about gestures that make the other person happy.

Whether it’s giving them something they like, cooking their favorite food, or sharing a common hobby, show the other person that you care. Additionally, consider that any of these acts strengthens the connection with others or rekindles the couple’s spark.

Being a more loving person requires will

We can all feel affection for other people. However, Being a more loving person means expressing it in different ways. There are those who prefer physical contact, through hugs or kisses, while others express it through words or gestures. Whatever the case, giving affection is important to keep relationships alive.

Although it may seem very complex at first, affection has its benefits, both for those who receive it and for those who give it. Maybe this will help you take the initiative and start practicing the tips above. It’s never too late to show those you love that they are important to you. or to seek professional help to motivate you to do so.

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