The importance of good communication

We usually hear or read about how important it is to maintain good communication, whether in the workplace, family, social or relationship. However, Do we take into account everything that the communication process entails?
We do not always find the right words, the way to make ourselves understood or to convey what we want to convey., even transforming into words what we think or feel. We often find it quite a challenge. Sometimes we even consider that it is not us, but our interlocutor who is putting up a barrier so that our message does not reach them.

We are not aware of all the gear that is part of our communication processes. We forget the importance of communicating with others clearly and simplywithout thinking about the impact that our words and gestures may have.

We assume, we take for granted, we create personal hypotheses about events or people, we overinterpret, we defame, we add or remove details from the information that has come to us, etc.

As Paul Watzlawick, one of the greatest experts in human communication of his day, pointed out, people make big mistakes in this process, which completely undermines our ability to reach agreements or consolidate relationships.

We create realities from language

We are like sculptors, who create or destroy the information that they originate or receive, based on their characteristics,

When a person tries to convey an image, a feeling, a concept or an idea, the interlocutor probably will not receive the same thing. Had you thought about it? The cause of the vast majority of misunderstandings is when people believe they are talking about the same thing, but their conception is totally different.

In this way, studies such as the one carried out by psychologists Celia Roberts and Val Wass, from King’s College London, tell us that Teaching communication skills is key in the training of every university student. Tomorrow, a professional with limited skills in this matter will not carry out his or her work adequately.

To create realities with greater meaning, meaning and closeness, we must rise as effective communicators.

Keys to effective communication

There are couples who talk about love, but have different visions of it. There are people who share a friendship, each having different characteristics. Have you never thought that perhaps when you are talking or arguing with a person, you may have different visions or meanings about what you do not agree on?

In conversations with others, the word may be the same but the content is totally different. Surface and depth may not have the relationship you imagine. We must take into account what we say and how we do it, to obtain a more precise map of our communication with others.

According to Lamb, Hair and McDaniel, for communication to be effective, the following processes must occur:

Active listening

It is common that people talk without listening to what the other has to say. While the interlocutor is expressing his point of view, we are thinking about the next response to give and making our speech the center of the conversation.

Another mistake is to listen and pay attention only to what you want., ignoring what does not interest us or what goes against our principles. It’s as if we have a filter that only focuses on information that is consonant with our emotions and thoughts. In these cases, it is impossible to reach agreements or understandings with positions different from ours.

Empathy

Being empathetic implies being able to identify the feelings and thoughts of other individuals, and experience them as if they were our own. Empathy is essential in effective communication, as it facilitates mutual understanding.

If we want our message to successfully reach the recipients, it will be very useful to identify with the interlocutors. Knowing what they think, feel or think about the topic will encourage us to respond appropriately..

Understanding non-verbal language

Non-verbal language (gestures and body postures) also convey a message. Paying attention to the body language of our interlocutors will help a lot to understand the message. Likewise, in all communication, the ideal is for our body and our words to be in tune. Thus, we avoid causing confusion.

Assertiveness

One aspect of assertiveness is ability to express our wishes in a kind, frank, open, direct and appropriate waywithout attacking others.

Difference resolution skills

One way to do it is being open to other points of view. If we are predisposed to impose our beliefs and not accept other perspectives, it will be difficult to achieve effective communication with anyone.

I respect

Hand in hand with what was said above, it is important that we know that not everything our interlocutors say will be in line with our positions. The ideal is to accept this reality and respect all the divergences we find. This means not imposing our beliefs or opinions, and encouraging reflective and integrative dialogue.

An opportunity to improve our communication and the emotional aspects of it can be found in the course “Improve your communication” of Javier Cebreiros available on our platform, which takes us into the wonderful universe of communication and provides us with various strategies.

In the following video we can get an idea of ​​the importance of good communication in a beautiful love story:

Ask instead of assume

When we have a conversation with another person It is essential that we ask the other what what we are talking about is or what it means to them.

What is love for you? What is a relationship for you? What does it mean to you to be loyal or boring? What is happiness or sadness for you? And in the same way, we can also explain how we see it. Otherwise, we will only find ourselves assuming that the other shares our vision of the world or that they think the same as us. And this would be too much of a coincidence, right?

We would save ourselves a lot of conflict and misunderstanding if instead of assuming, we had asked Before asking our interlocutor what he was referring to with his idea or approach…

Each one carries their education, their experiences, their training, their personal characteristics, so that we always share similar opinions or feelings. They are the glasses with which we feel, interpret, think and act about the world. And each of us wears a different model.

We communicate through stories

Why not think that what we communicate is as if it were a story? What I communicate to you is as if it were a story, the events experienced from my experience, one version and what you understand is another version based on your characteristics. You listen to me, but based on your peculiarities that’s how you understand me.

Or have you not realized that sometimes, when we have told something to someone and that person has communicated it to another, they do not transmit exactly the same thing as us? Each person points out what is important according to their experiences. That is why each person is responsible for communicating their own story.

When we say that the other is not right, what we are really expressing is that they do not think the same as us. Or not? Reflect on it…

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