The Difference Between a Narcissist and a Sociopath (and How to Tell If You’re Dating One)

Many of us have come across at least one manipulative and selfish person.

Maybe you’ve dated someone or know someone who is currently with one – either way, you’ve probably referred to him as a sociopath or narcissisttwo terms that are commonly used synonymously.

While both personality disorders share some traits, it is actually wrong to use them in the same way.

To help us differentiate one from the other, we spoke with psychotherapist Avery Neal, who specializes in women’s therapy.

According to Avery, the biggest difference between the two is that when a sociopath feels hurt or angry, they do everything to harm you — even if it means hurting themselves in the process. “Whereas, a narcissist, things are really more about them,” says Avery. “They really are more focused on themselves and how things are going to serve them.” A narcissist usually only goes to this extreme if something is in their best interest.

Although difficult, it is possible to have a relationship with a narcissist with less severe symptoms because they may be able to feel guilt and even love. A sociopath, however, has no remorse in any case and feels justified in his actions.

Interestingly, “while sociopaths qualify as narcissists, not all narcissists are sociopaths,” according to Avery.

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Traits of a Narcissist

1. Has an inflated ego or sense of personal importance.
2. Lack of empathy for others.
3. You are in constant need of admiration.
4. He believes he is superior to others and therefore expects special treatment.
5. Exploit others for personal gain.
6. Is easily jealous of others or thinks others are jealous of him or her.

Traits of a Sociopath

1. Demonstrates illegal behavior.
2. It’s impulsive.
3. Mind repeatedly.
4. Has a history of fights or aggressions.
5. It disregards personal safety or the safety of others.
6. Feel justified in hurting or mistreating others.
7. Cannot maintain good behavior at work or school.
8. He is unable to maintain a long-term relationship.

Narcissists and sociopaths share traits like being controlling, selfish, unreliable, dishonest and authoritarian.

but they too can be hard to spot early on in a relationshipbecause they are often charismatic, charming and intelligent.

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One of the main reasons people don’t recognize their abusive situation until much later is for this very reason.

According to Avery, abusive partners are often on their best behavior at first and gradually exhibit signs of abuse as the partner becomes more intimate.

Sociopaths in particular can be easier to fall in love with because they are more likely to focus their attention on you than on themselves, unlike narcissists. But remember that it is just a means to reach your end goal.

A sociopath is calculating and manipulative, while a narcissist will often use intimidation and exploitation to get what they want.

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