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Symptoms of depression after a breakup

There are couple breakups that encapsulate us in perpetual suffering. It is not always easy to form a good grief after these experiences and that is why it is so common to lead to depression.

The ravages of love and heartbreak are profound. We often overlook the symptoms of depression after a breakup.. We do not see it, we even normalize the suffering, hoping that it will disappear with the days and assuming that “time heals everything.” However, the sadness is not resolved and the memory is like that rearview mirror that we always look back at.

William Shakespeare once said that the wounds unseen are the deepest.. It is true, the most complicated thing of all is that we often immerse ourselves in them without remedy, infecting them daily with harmful behaviors and thoughts. One of those who, far from turning the page on what can no longer be, recreate ourselves in impossible things, in a past that no longer has meaning or presence.

Depression due to a breakup is more common than we may believe. Thus, something that is often seen is that many people end up developing major depression after months. Almost without realizing it, they find themselves unable to perform at work, to enjoy their moments of leisure and their social relationships as before.

It is important to know the symptoms associated with these experiences and, above all, be able to shape a healthier breakup grief. We analyze it.

What are the symptoms of depression after a breakup?

No breakup is easy, not even one agreed upon by both parties. It means having to restart our lives in another way, defining presents and futures. It also involves reformulating ourselves and dealing with many conflicting, confusing and complicated emotions to manage. Memories are heavy and while life progresses, our internal world remains trapped, stopped and not really knowing where to start.

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It is important to point out one aspect in relation to these situations. Often, We normalize states that we process as normal within the grief itself due to the breakup, when in reality they are pathological.. Studies, such as those carried out at the Groningen University Medical Center in the Netherlands, affirm that many of us do not know how to recognize the symptoms of depression after a breakup.

Generally, if a person manages to manage the stressful situations after the end of the relationship, they have a lower risk of leading to a psychological disorder. However, those who have fewer coping skills, those who let themselves get carried away by frustration or the need to reconnect with their ex-partner, are at greater risk of developing major depression.

However, let’s know the symptoms of depression after a breakup.

emotional symptoms

In general, Each person experiences the end of an emotional relationship in a different way. However, when you live in a traumatic way or have few coping skills to deal with these experiences, it is common to experience the following.

Persistent feelings of sadness and heartbreak.To one’s own despair, You can add rage and anger, the feeling that things should have gone differently. Often, the feeling of guilt is also integrated, the idea of ​​“It’s all my fault, I messed it up“.Fear and despair at the idea of ​​not seeing that person again.Vacuum sensation.Feelings of worthlessness.Loss of motivation.

Cognitive symptoms

Among the symptoms of depression after a breakup, there are many states in which the mind does not stop thinking, imagining a thousand situations, remembering moments from yesterday… All of this intensifies the feeling of helplessness.

Thoughts on how to get your partner back, ways to contact, to see her again… The mind does not stop reviewing those things that could have led to the breakup. We imagine hundreds of possibilities that could have avoided that outcome.Likewise, It is common for the person to become obsessed with imagining what the ex-partner is doing and who they will be with.In these states, it is very difficult to focus attention and make decisions. Cognitive performance is reduced, it is difficult to memorize, solve problems…

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Likewise, it is important to note that in these situations it is common for suicidal ideas to arise. A very serious fact that we must consider.

Behaviors associated with symptoms of depression after a breakup

Among the symptoms of depression after a breakup, behavioral ones should be highlighted. A great variability opens up here, but in general we can see the following dynamics:

There are changes in diet, the person either begins to overeat or loses their appetite. Changes in sleeping habits are experienced. There are those who begin to suffer from insomnia or suffer from hypersomnia. Loss of energy appears. The feeling of exhaustion is constant, which makes it impossible to perform at study or work. Interest is lost in everything that previously motivated them. The person often He can’t stop keeping track of his ex-partner. This causes them to frequently check their social networks and look for ways to contact them. Often, we can see risky or addictive behaviorssuch as starting to consume alcohol or drifting into one failed relationship after another in an attempt to forget the ex-partner.

What can we do if we show all these symptoms?

If you notice many of the symptoms of depression after a breakup, it is time to become aware of one aspect. We cannot do it alone. Research such as that carried out at the University of Sherbrooke (Canada) warns that these types of situations sustained over time end up showing suicidal ideation. And this is a point we cannot reach.

It is important to ask for expert help. Thus, in these situations the following may be useful to us:

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Seek help. In addition to adequate psychological support, it is appropriate to have someone to talk to on a daily basis: friends, family.We must break contact with the ex-partner completely. And this starts by deleting it from our contacts and social networks. Don’t avoid the pain, leave space for your emotions and vent them, accept them.Reframe your beliefs and thoughts. Believe it or not “yes you can live without that person“Promote changes, place new goals on your horizon.

Sometimes, small changes bring new opportunities and they bring us different winds, people, activities and projects that excite us again. At the end of the day, that’s what it’s all about when we deal with depression, getting excited again.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Burger, J., Stroebe, MS, Perrig-Chiello, P., Schut, HA, Spahni, S., Eisma, MC, & Fried, EI (2020). Bereavement or breakup: Differences in networks of depression. Journal of Affective Disorders, 267, 1–8. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2020.01.157Brassard, A., St-Laurent Dubé, M., Gehl, K., and Lecomte, T. (2018). Romantic attachment and postbreakup depression symptoms and suicidal behavior. Sante Mentale Au Quebec, 43 (1), 145-162. https://doi.org/10.7202/1048899arVerhallen, AM, Renken, RJ, Marsman, JBC, & Ter Horst, GJ (2019). Romantic relationship breakup: An experimental model to study effects of stress on depression (-like) symptoms. PLOS ONE, 14(5). https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0217320

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