Rigid and flexible families: how are they different?

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In a family, the roles and functions of each member need to be clear and there must be authority. Equally necessary, for it to be functional, is that the system is capable of adapting to the changes that occur in the environment.

Written and verified by the psychologist Elena Sanz.

There is no family equal to another. Each family nucleus has its own rules, particularities and relationship dynamics. But, in any case, to be considered healthy and functional, certain parameters must be met. Differentiating between rigid and adaptable families is a first step to perceive the health of the ties. that are established in them.

First of all, we must remember that Families are made up of several subsystems. The conjugal (the relationship of a couple or marriage), the fraternal (the interaction between siblings) and the paternal-filial (the educational actions aimed at raising children).

Adaptability (or rigidity) refers precisely to how clear or diffuse the boundaries between the different subsystems are. And also how rigid or flexible these are depending on the degree of adaptability, we can distinguish four types of families.

The differences between rigid and adaptive families: a classification

rigid families

These are in an extreme position of rigidity and lack of adaptability. The functions of each subsystem are clearly defined and the boundaries firmly established.

The internal borders are very rigid, so there is little interaction and emotional involvement between family members. Each one presents a high sense of independence and a marked feeling of family belonging.

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Turning to others for help is usually not an option, so there is a low level of mutual support. The stress or worries of one of the members are experienced individually and do not disturb the others. The time shared is very limited and there are few common interests.

Structured families

They are placed in an intermediate, healthier and more flexible position. There are defined and differentiated functions for parents and children, with the former being the ones who hold the authority.

Nonetheless, These families are more inclined to make modifications and adaptations in their dynamics than the previous one.. The interaction and involvement between members is greater, but individuality still prevails.

Flexible families

Flexible families also occupy a middle point on the continuum. In them the roles are clear and the limits too, but these are easily modified if necessary. There is greater emotional closeness between family members. Time, spaces and interests are shared and mutual help and loyalty prevail.

chaotic families

Finally, chaotic families are positioned at the other end of the continuum, also being poorly functional. In these types of families The roles and functions of each one are not clearly known and the limits are completely blurred.. There are practically no differences in the role of its members: nothing separates parents and children.

They usually present a high dependency among family members. Closeness, loyalty, support and consideration towards the family is expected and demanded in every decision.. There is no individual development of each member due to the exaggerated sense of family belonging.

Consequences of living in more or less rigid families

As in many aspects of life, when it comes to family adaptability, virtue is at the center. Structured and flexible families are the healthiest and most functional options. And they are because they allow individual development while providing affection and support.

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For his part, Rigid families prevent emotional closeness and can generate feelings of loneliness and lack of support. In addition, they may face serious difficulties if their circumstances change (for example, one of the family members becomes ill) as they are not willing to modify their dynamics or the functions of each one.

On the other hand, Chaotic families fail in one of the most important functions: providing structure. Children who grow up in these types of environments can be seriously affected. Well, for correct development the clarity and stability that limits provide is necessary.

Children may have problems developing their identity and autonomy. And they generally tend to grow up being indecisive, insecure and excessively dependent on their family clan.

A healthy and functional family is one that finds a balance between rigidity and chaos. The roles of each one must be clear and the subsystems differentiated, but equally It is necessary that the system be open to adapt to the changing circumstances that may occur.