Loving means knowing how to say what you feel

Knowing how to say what you feel gives meaning and authenticity to your life. Not only do you save time, you not only act from sincerity, leaving fears and insecurities aside. Giving voice to feelings is a way to combine love, to make it real, close and embrace the other with our emotions. What is so simple to understand is, for many, very complicated to carry out.

Why do it? Some say. From the moment we start a life with our partner or have given children to the world, It seems like feelings are always taken for granted. It is as if the simple fact of sharing a roof, time and space was enough to take for granted what they feel about each other. When in reality it is not like that.

We all need to know what we mean to someone. There will be those who say that words do not matter if there are actions that prove it. However, Giving voice and words to feelings is a basic emotional caress that also nourishes and validates and this is necessary for adults and children.

Loving means knowing how to say what you feel

Love is action, we know. Love is a verb that requires intentions, commitments and acts of courage. However, we cannot neglect emotional expression and knowing how to communicate those feelings. It is curious, for example, that one of the things that people regret most on their deathbed is not having said “I love you” more times to their loved ones.

Partner, children, parents, brothers and friends. Saying what we feel to our loved ones without fear and frequently gives that bond a more lively, richer and authentic strength. Knowing we are loved gives us a sense of belonging, gives us roots and valuable reinforcements for self-esteem.. There are never too many “I love you”it never hurts “You are important to me”.

Knowing how to say what you feel and the problem of alexithymia

Emotional expression is directly related to assertiveness. Also with the ability to identify emotions, understand those feelings and then translate and express them in words. Something that on the surface seems easy requires a highly sophisticated process at a neurological level.

This explains, for example, why People with alexithymia have so many problems in this matter. Saying what you feel requires first understanding what is happening inside you and then knowing how to find the words that support and reflect those internal realities. Thus, studies such as those carried out at the University of Groningen in the Netherlands point out something interesting in this regard.

People with difficulties understanding and expressing emotions evidence a neurological failure in the area of ​​the insular cortex and the anterior cingulate cortex. This leads to limitations in discerning what they feel and putting out loud everything related to their feelings.

When the education received conditions emotional expression

There are many homes in which people grow up in a climate of high emotional repression.. They are little or no nourishing environments in which no one expresses their feelings or needs. What’s more, when someone dares to vent what they feel, such as sadness, fear or anger, they are usually criticized or punished.

Actions matter, but so do words.

On average, there is the idea that women are the first to say “I love you” to a partner and also the ones who express it the most. However, studies such as those carried out at the University of Minnesota indicate that, in reality, It is men who usually take the first step.

However, the important thing is not who says it first, the decisive thing is knowing how to express it in everyday actions beyond the first phases of falling in love. Loving is a daily exercise that permeates big and small acts. It is not taking anything for granted, it is concern and it is affection, it is knowing how to respond to the needs and desires of each act, each situation.

Loving means knowing how to say what you feel because, in addition to actions, people also feed on words. And in these cases it is not enough to express it in the same way as someone who says good morning or asks for salt to be passed at the table. I love you must be sincere, expressed face to face and without rushing.

Loving means knowing how to say what you feel, do not leave for tomorrow what excites you today

Loving means knowing how to say what you feel now, because we may not have another chance.. Loving is a feeling that requires courage to act, to express and open ourselves to others in the present moment. By remaining silent you may lose a valuable opportunity with that person who may never appear in your life again.

Perhaps, that friend needs more than ever to know that he is loved, that he is important. It is possible that your child, your partner or your mother is going through a bad time and nothing helps them more than remembering how much they are loved. Saying what we feel costs nothing and means a lot, so let’s not leave it for tomorrow. Let’s express what excites us today.

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