Letter to the child in me

Healing our inner child means deciding to let the emotional wounds of our childhood stop controlling our lives.

Dear inner child: I am turning to you after years of absence because today, at last, I have managed to see you. Sitting in a dark and lonely corner of myself. I have found you with a lost look and no hope. In the most absolute silence and abandonment because, In all this time, I never noticed you.

You look so small, so fragile and so alone… You seem tired of fighting a thousand battles, exhausted from bearing burdens that do not belong to you. I know you have cried, I know you have screamed and no one has heard your pleas. That you feel lost and that you don’t understand life. I know you’ve needed me and I haven’t been there.

Sorry

Forgive me, little one, for a lifetime turning my back on you. I’m sorry for not having wanted to see you, not having wanted to hear you, not having wanted to accept that you are part of me. I left you in the past and forgot about your open wounds. It was easier to leave you behind.

For years you have kept the deepest pain. The first rejection, the first abandonment, the first humiliation and the first betrayal. And all the subsequent ones. All the emotional wounds of my childhood fell on you, and I abandoned you in the task of processing the damage.

Sorry for not understanding that that job was not yours, You didn’t have the tools to deal with it. How could I ask a child to understand, forgive and learn from suffering? I overwhelmed you and I still see you confused and shocked. Living in the worst memories and unable to escape.

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Thank you

Thank you, because I know that, despite everything, you did what you could. I know you gave everything you had so we could move forward. I know you tried to free me from the burdens of my past, so we could move on to a better future. And you don’t know how much I appreciate your effort, your fight and your perseverance.

Thank you for the strength to endure so much for me, while I refused to do so. Thank you for having lived so long with bleeding wounds and an empty soul and not giving up. For trying to communicate by every means possible that we needed to heal.

Every attack of anger was your voice reminding me not to let us be humiliated again. Every plea to partners, friends and family was your fear, begging me not to let them abandon us again. The times I didn’t dare to approach people, to show myself as I am, it was your little hand holding me back so as not to expose us to a new rejection.

You always tried to take care of me. With the few resources that a child has been able to acquire, you tried to keep me safe. Maybe the cries, the screams and the lack of control were not the most appropriate, but they were the only thing you had to give me. What had worked for you, as a child; although for me, as an adult, not anymore.

I promise you, my dear inner child

I promise you that, starting today, you will never be alone again. Now that I’ve finally found you, I’m not going to leave you anymore. Today I free you from the weight and I commit to taking responsibility for myself. Today I take the reins of my life and assume my role as an adult; Let me take care of you from now on.

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I promise to do everything necessary to integrate the painful experiences and settle the past. I promise to stop running away, look straight into the darkness and tell him that, you and I, we no longer live there. Memories will no longer limit us, they will no longer control our lives.

I am going to accept myself as I am, without allowing other people’s opinions to make me feel less. Today it is our needs and desires that I am going to listen to. I promise to stay away from those who harm and humiliate us, learn to select my environments and free ourselves from the need to please everyone.

I promise to love you, and love me, above all. I promise to make self-love the banner of my life, so that you never feel neglected again. You are the most valuable part of my own being, I don’t know how I could be without you for so long. I don’t know how you could be without me for so long. I promise you that you will be home. With love: me… and you.