Lack of patience with children, why?

Lack of patience with children is an evil that afflicts many parents. There are also many who do not know why this happens to them, if they adore their children and only want the best for them. The truth is that one does not exclude the other, when you become a parent without having resolved some internal issues or without using inappropriate strategies to overcome parenting.

It is very common that a lack of patience with children leads to unfair behavior that later gives rise to self-reproaches. This also generates confusion in the boys and, sometimes, strange as it may seem, stimulates behaviors who find their parents more intolerable.

All this This happens especially with younger children., although it is also usually present with adolescent children. Why does this lack of patience develop with children? How can this be resolved? This is what we will see next.

Lack of patience with children: the causes

Definitely, The lack of patience with children is telling us about a latent anger towards them or what they represent.. In other words, impatience is a manifestation of something deeper and that generates a state of dissatisfaction, frustration or discomfort.

The reasons that may motivate lack of patience with children are the following:

Lack of clarity in the distribution of roles to be fulfilled. It happens when you assume the role of father without being aware of what this means. It is thought that it is something natural, about which there is nothing to learn, when it is not.The breeding it becomes an obstacle to the realization of individual desires. The mother, the father or both want to start projects that need time and parenting is seen as a burden in this sense.The relationship is not good. Sometimes children are perceived as a source of conflict within the couple. To that extent, they end up seeing each other as an obstacle to enjoying coexistence.patterns repeat. Those who have been raised with abuse or inconsideration tend to repeat those patterns, if they have not done elaborate work on this.There are problems with impulse control. Sometimes the problem is that there is no understanding and control over one’s own emotions, not only with children, but in life in general.The son is rejected. This usually occurs unconsciously and does not mean that the parents are monsters. What happens is that they have not accepted their motherhood or fatherhood, for some reason, even though they love their little ones.

Decode anger

Lack of patience with children is a symptom and should be seen as such. This means that The issue to be resolved is not this, but what is behind it. This implies a work of reflection and honesty with oneself, to identify the cause or causes for this to occur.

A good starting point is to start by thinking about the reasons that motivated fathers to become fathers.. It is not always the result of a plan and it does not always occur at the most appropriate time. This may be the origin of intolerance towards that person who exists and demands a place in the life of his or her parents.

It is also advisable to reflect on the state of the couple’s relationship and the parenting patterns that are being developed. Where do these guidelines come from? What is its basis? Do they really work?

Emergency codes

Reflections can take time, but it is very important to do them because only in this way will you get to the bottom of the matter. Meanwhile, There are some measures that are well worth taking into account to moderate the lack of patience with your children..

You can try the following:

Do not speak or act in moments of great anger. Anger makes its way on its own and only makes us make mistakes. Better to wait a moment before doing or saying something.less control. It is important to accept that during parenting there will hardly be moments in which we have total control of the situation. There are realities that are not going to meet expectations, so it is best to remove drama from the topic.Ask for help. If parenting is perceived as a burden that overwhelms the energy available, it is best to seek help from your partner, friends or some external agent.Notice. It is good to take note of the moments and reasons that trigger anger, as well as the children’s behaviors in this regard.

To the above it should be added that It is advisable to talk to the couple and agree on parenting guidelines and the distribution of tasks.. It is also appropriate to find out about the best strategies to educate children.

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