You want to move on and find a nice person to complete you, don’t you? So tell me how can you go to the future if you’re stuck in the past?

Do you happen to think that your next boyfriend or girlfriend will be happy knowing that you are “little friends” with the guy or girl you once had a relationship with?

Keeping friends with someone you’ve had a relationship with is a sure recipe for being unhappy in love.

This has already happened to me. In 2011, after I ended a relationship of 2 ½ years, I wanted to keep my ex around. I kept calling her, wanting to know what she was doing, wanting to be a little friend, you know?!

And in those stupid attitudes I had, I only went deeper into defeat. How to forget someone you want to keep close? Can you imagine my deep sadness when I found out that she had gone out with friends to bars? So imagine when I found out there was another one on the parade!

Trust me, if you’ve ended a relationship and want to move on with your life, forget about keeping friends with EX.

An interesting fact here is that I get a lot of emails from people who have ended a relationship and want to remain friends. They say, “Alan, my ex said we can be friends”; or say, “Alan, I would like to at least be friends with him/her”. Let me open your mind:

In case you still like the person and want to be friends with them

You will only attract bad things to you by not being able to forget the person;
You will suffer to see the person’s life go on without you;
You will be filled with jealousy every time you find someone close to her;
Or when you see that she is interested in someone;
Or when she’s dating someone else;
You will blind yourself to future loves;
And when you find someone who wants you, you’re going to ruin it by befriending your ex;
Your future partner will be jealous of you and rightly so;
And you might not even have a future partner;
Time will only hurt you when you realize that trying to be friends with the person won’t bring them back;
And there will always be a particular block in you that will prevent you from moving forward and being happy, your life will be completely at a standstill in the sentimental aspect.

In case you don’t like the person anymore

If you don’t like it, then why do you want to keep friendship, just to hurt that person?
Do you happen to want to keep her around for when you want to “kill that need” and use her for your own pleasure?
Don’t you think the best thing that could happen to her is to be without you around?
Do you like to enslave others sentimentally?
What do you get for having someone you don’t want lying at your feet with no possibility of freeing yourself from that feeling?
If you don’t like it anymore, stop giving hope to those who still want you. Better you cut the friendship for good for the two of you to be able to move on than keep hoping in the other. Nobody deserves your crumbs.

Believe me, being friends with EX never works out, because one of the parties will always suffer.

So if you recently ended your relationship, delete all photos, cut all contacts, block on all social networks.

And if you already have someone else, stop chit-chatting with your EX. Respect the person you are having a relationship with now, otherwise they will soon become EX too and you will be left in the pit, crying in defeat.

And if this person you were in a relationship with already has another relationship, stop bothering them. Let her move on and give someone else the opportunity to make this person happy, which you weren’t able to do.

Did you get the message? Now run away, delete all the photos, throw away all the gifts, block on zap, unfriend on facebook and show yourself that you want to move forward.