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How to take the first step with someone you like

If you like someone, are attracted to you and are sure of what you feel, you don’t have to wait for the other person to take the step. Take a risk, it is always worse to stay in the mood than to have tried.

How to take the first step with someone you like? It seems to be the classic question we ask ourselves when we are teenagers. However, there are those who, in adulthood, continue to doubt the art of love, the game of conquest and the mechanisms of attraction between two people. Because… What if we take a risk and get no for an answer?

That is the usual fear. However, as they say, in this life those who do not take risks run the risk of being left forever wondering what would have happened. And, let’s admit it, There are few things more disappointing than looking in the existential rearview mirror and regretting all those things not done, untested and untried.

Therefore, it is advisable to combine self-confidence with charm and take the first step when a person attracts us. It is true that there may be certain difficulties, such as being excessively shy or even not being entirely sure that we are attracted to the one who has completely slipped into the throne of our heart.

“I feel drawn, like Icarus towards his sun. I have already been burned, and yet here I am again.”

-AND. L James-

Keys to take the first step when you like someone

Although it may sound superficial to say it, Much of the attraction we feel for someone in the initial phases comes from physical attractiveness.. Research works such as those carried out by Swami, V. and Furnham, A. (2008) highlight that this is almost always that first starting point that makes us place our gaze on some and not others.

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Although it is evident that there are many more factors when falling in love with someone, it is important to consider something. If you want to take the first step when you like someone, At least value that there are other variables beyond mere physical attraction. It is appropriate to glimpse more factors such as intellectual connection, communication, shared values ​​and that complicity that makes everything easy and even fun.

Sometimes, that initial attraction is orchestrated by chemicals such as oxytocin, phenethylamine, and dopamine that make us act out of mere desire and impulse. Thus, It is advisable to apply the filter of objectivity and ask ourselves what aspects we like about that person, and if those dimensions will allow us to build a solid relationship.

Let’s see what more keys can help you take the first step when you like someone.

1. Learn to manage the fear of being rejected

When it comes to “taking the plunge” with someone, the fear of rejection stops us. It is even possible that we maintain a good friendship with that person and that revealing our feelings makes us break that beautiful bond. However, we must value an obvious fact.

It is very difficult to maintain a friendship when you harbor deep feelingsTherefore, it is appropriate to be honest and, later, in view of the response, assess whether or not it is good for us to continue maintaining said friendly relationship. Likewise, and in all cases, it is good to manage those fears at the idea of ​​receiving a “no” for an answer.

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Living with doubts or simply waiting for the other person to take the step is not always the best thing to do. We will have a better image of ourselves if we dare.

2. Don’t look for the moment, “create the moment”

When you want to take the first step with someone you like, it is common to wait for the right moment. A moment of greater physical closeness, of intimacy, of complicity sharing something… The truth is that instead of “waiting”, it is better to “promote” that moment and, in this way, play it safer.

We can propose to the other person a romantic dinner, a short weekend getaway… The simple proposal already entails a special context and if the answer to that plan is affirmative, it already gives us an obvious clue that one’s interest in the other can be reciprocal.

3. Taking the first step with someone you like: what are the most accurate words?

What to say? How to express correctly and assertively what we feel without hesitation and without making a fool of ourselves? This is undoubtedly the most classic question.

However, instead of obsessing over what to say or what not to say, It is more appropriate to focus on our feelings and emotions to act in a more solvent, sincere and effective way.. If we speak from the heart and calm, the words will come out alone.

Don’t get obsessed with nerves. Think that that stress, that pain in the stomach and those tremors are normal. Look the other person in the eyes, seek their attention, connect with them with sincerity and simplicity. Give them all your attention, shorten distances.Let yourself go, avoid artifice and use a simple and direct phrase. “I would like to get serious with you”; “I like you, I feel something very special for you.”

4. Past experience helps, but remember that each person is unique

When taking the first step with someone you like, it is common for you to think about your past relationships, about what you did previously in that same situation. It is true that every experience counts to obtain knowledge in the art of relationships and seduction, however, it is good to take one detail into account.

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Each person is unique and each relationship is exceptional. The most appropriate thing is to focus on getting to know as much as possible who attracts, likes and fascinates you. Take care of her and treat her like someone new, like a treasure to discover.

If we always act naturally and humbly, being ourselves and leaving aside all artifice, that first step will be a beautiful experience that is worth starting.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Marazziti D, Canale D. Hormonal changes when falling in love. Psychoneuroendocrinology. 2004 Aug;29(7):931-6. doi: 10.1016/j.psyneuen.2003.08.006. PMID: 15177709.Miller, R., Perlman, D., and Brehm, S.S. (2014). Intimate Relationships. McGrawHill Companies.Torras-Gómez E, Puigvert L, Aiello E, Khalfaoui A. Our Right to the Pleasure of Falling in Love. Front Psychol. 2020 Jan 22;10:3068. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2019.03068. PMID: 32038418; PMCID: PMC6987459.

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