How to overcome the fear of talking on the phone

Despite not having exact data on the incidence of telephobia (irrational fear of communicating through this medium), we would be surprised at the number of people who suffer from it. The anxiety when hearing the sound of the cell phone, the panic of having to pick it up and having to start a conversation define a very widespread type of anxiety.

However, Let’s not think that this particularity is something of this century. Robert Graves, British writer, poet, and scholar, experienced a deep fear at the thought of having to answer or make a phone call. He expressed it this way in 1929. Today, however, we have multiple technologies that allow us to communicate without having to speak directly to someone.

This has made it easier for this phobia to develop even more and also to camouflage itself. Many can manage their daily lives by sending emails without showing that fear, that anguish. Although at some point it will happen. It doesn’t matter if the cell phone is silenced, sooner or later an incoming call will appear on the screen or we will be forced to call someone…

Is there any mechanism or strategy to address this type of phobia? We analyze it

The fear of talking on the phone is very common in people with social anxiety.

Telephobia or fear of talking or picking up the phone: symptoms and origin

In 2019, a survey was carried out on a large sample of workers in the United Kingdom. It could be discovered that 76% of millennials and 40% of baby boomers suffer from telephobia. The same happens with the generation Za population sector that, for the most part, clearly prefers to communicate through other types of channels rather than through telephone calls.

It is easy to deduce what this type of anxiety means on a personal and professional level. Many people lose job opportunities due to the anxiety caused by having to pick up the phone.. Although it is true that the WhatsAppsemails or voice messages dominate a good part of our communication, receiving and having to make calls is also part of our daily lives.

In case we identify with this type of problem, we should know two things. The first is that we are facing a type of phobia and, therefore, facing an anxiety disorder. This is a very widespread type of fear. We are not the only ones nor are we weirdos for experiencing it. On the other hand, It is important to be clear that we can overcome this type of irrational fear.

What are the symptoms of telephobia?

The continued use of resources that replace direct communication can sometimes mask telephobia. Furthermore, you may not even give it importance and always choose to silence the phone and let the calls go to voicemail. It’s not appropriate. It is decisive to become aware of whether or not we suffer from this particularity.

These are the symptoms:

Panic and blocking when it rings or we see an incoming call.Make excuses to avoid people calling us or having to call us. Let the calls ring until the end so you don’t have to answer them.Feeling high stress when faced with the obligation to make a call.Not feeling competent while speaking during a telephone conversation. Stammering, saying short, hesitant sentences during the conversation. Mentally reviewing the dialogue after the call and feeling bad about yourself. Experiencing palpitations and even dizziness when the phone rings.Don’t think about anything else when we know we are going to receive a call.

What are the causes behind this phobia?

If we want to overcome the fear of talking on the phone, it is interesting to know what lies behind it. Telephobia is almost always explained by a social anxiety disorder. Research from the University of Plymouth highlights this fact and how people with this type of psychological trait always prefer messages to calls.

On the other hand, it is also important to clarify one detail. Whoever shows this type of phobia is not afraid of the telephone, they fear interaction. They are terrified of not being competent, of saying the wrong thing, of not knowing what to answer when asked something and, above all, of being judged…

People who suffer from telephobia fear appearing stupid or incompetent during interactions on the phone.

Keys to overcome the fear of talking on the phone

The most suitable approach to overcome the fear of talking on the phone is cognitive behavioral therapy. Specifically, the most effective strategies are cognitive restructuring and progressive exposure. We analyze it below.

Make a hierarchy of your fears

The first step to managing this phobia is to clarify those situations that generate the most fear. We will start with the most intense ones until we clarify those fears a little more manageable. This would be an example.

Fear of someone calling me with whom I have to talk about something important. Having to call someone I don’t know to talk about something serious. Waiting for a relevant call and not knowing when it will be. Anguish when seeing the cell phone ring. Calling Go to a place and ask a simple question, such as asking about hours. Talk on the phone with a friend or family member. Make a call and know that a machine will answer.

Face the least distressing situations first to move on to the most paralyzing ones.

The key is to work through the least stressful situations until you reach the most paralyzing ones. To do this, we can follow the following strategies:

Practice telephone conversations in private and with yourself. The exercises of role-playing They can allow you to practice how to answer calls for job offers, to any other situation that is paralyzing. Get in the habit of talking on the phone with people you know and trust.Make simple calls: like ordering food at home, or asking for opening hours in stores. Ask a friend to call you unannounced at any time of the day and with the number hidden.Reward yourself every time you manage to pick up your phone and respond. Visualize yourself on the phone with a company. Imagine yourself doing well and feeling proud of yourself. Practice deep breathing and relaxation exercises.Make scripts and practice them. If you’re expecting an important call, have it ready. Set a ringtone that’s relaxing and positive. When the phone rings, you can tell yourself that it will go well, that you’re competent, and that you’re going to enjoy the conversation.

Final note on overcoming the fear of talking on the phone

Sometimes we alone cannot overcome this type of fear. On average, behind it is almost always the increasingly widespread social anxiety. In case this condition is completely limiting our life, and even making it difficult for us to access the labor market, do not hesitate to request expert help.

We are facing a very widespread type of phobia that can be overcome and the support of professionals is always the best option.

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