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How to know that a person has problems with alcohol

Identifying alcoholism can be complicated. We may not want to see it, we may not notice the signs that show it, or we may even use certain strategies to normalize those behaviors that are actually anomalous.

Written and verified by the psychologist Elena Sanz.

Alcohol consumption is widespread and normalized in our society. It is the protagonist in all types of parties and meetings, and is used to celebrate, share and even to accompany main meals. For this reason, it can be difficult for a person to identify if their partner is an alcoholic and if they need help about it.

The issue becomes more complex if we take into account that alcoholism has several faces. In fact, Jellinek described five groups of alcoholics with different characteristics and consumption patterns.. Thus, the person does not necessarily have to drink daily or do so in large quantities to become dependent on alcohol. But then how can we determine if there is a drinking problem? We address this issue below.

How to know that a person has problems with alcohol

As we have said, the key to determining if a person is an alcoholic is not so much the frequency or intensity of consumption. In reality, we have to look at how the person drinks, do they do it to have fun? Do they do it to avoid feeling bad? Do they do it because they are not able to have fun without alcohol?

More specifically, the following may constitute warning signs:

1. Loss of control

Having a beer at a meeting with friends or drinking a glass of wine with lunch may not have much relevance. The problem appears when the person does not really have control over their consumption, and drink more or for longer than planned. Somehow, he can’t stop drinking once he’s started. This is what is known as compulsive consumption.

Compulsive alcohol consumption is one of the clearest characteristics of people who have alcohol problems.

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2. Salience

Salience is one of the most distinctive characteristics of dependency, and refers to the fact that Alcohol becomes the center of the person’s life. This occupies a large part of their time, whether consuming, thinking about drinking or investing time in obtaining alcohol.

The drink becomes the center of the person’s attention, thoughts and behaviors. Thus, it obtains a priority place in your life.

3. Tolerance and abstinence

In many cases, when alcohol addiction progresses, the person needs to consume more and more drink to obtain what you previously achieved with less. Whether to achieve the pleasant effects of alcohol or to simply feel good.

On the other hand, When consumption is stopped, withdrawal symptoms may appear.. The body and mind notice the absence of alcohol and react by generating unpleasant emotional states such as anxiety and restlessness or physical signs such as sweating, tremors, nausea or sleeping problems.

4. Abandonment of roles and activities due to consumption

To identify if a person is an alcoholic, pay attention to whether you have made changes to your daily routines and behaviors. It is common for an addiction to cause abandonment or neglect of responsibilities that until then the person assumed without any problem.

Alcoholism often takes time to become evident to people around us, because changes occur gradually.. In the end, there are not so many differences between today and yesterday that are so obvious. However, the anomalies can be very salient to someone who sees the person in widely spaced periods of time.

5. Emotional, cognitive and behavioral effects

Alcohol poisoning can affect mood, causing irritability and unstable moods. At a cognitive level, the ability to judge and make decisions may be altered, memory may be affected, resulting in later gaps, and speech and coordination may become difficult. In addition, it is common for inappropriate behavior, aggression and risky behavior to appear.

As a couple, you may suspect alcoholism if sexual dysfunctions appear, if behavior becomes erratic and unpredictable, or if Constant and unfounded discussions begin to arise due to the person’s irritability.

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6. Interference in daily life

In short, the biggest sign that your partner is an alcoholic can be found in their inability to stop drinking, even if the use is affecting your health, your mood, your job or your relationships.

The inability to drink can lead a person to lose everything they have.

My partner is an alcoholic: how can I help him?

Alcoholism not only causes serious damage to the life of the person suffering from dependence, it can also deeply affect those close to them. The role of the couple can serve as support and motivation, But if not acted upon appropriately, it can also perpetuate the addiction and cause great emotional suffering. So, these are some important recommendations:

Help her become aware that her alcohol use is problematic and that it is possible that an addiction exists. This is not easy to recognize, so you must try to be cautious and not accusatory. Address the topic in a sober moment and offer concrete examples of why you think there is a problem.Don’t help her hide the addiction or avoid the consequences. Sometimes, to avoid social shame or to think that we are doing the person a favor, we contribute to hiding or minimizing their problem, and we even take charge of certain situations to prevent them from suffering the consequences of their actions; But this is counterproductive and can make it more difficult for you to become aware of his situation. Be understanding and offer listening and support. Alcoholism is not a whim, but a disease that can hide various problems and suffering. For this, avoid blaming your partner and adopt an empathetic position. Offer to listen, understand the reason for their consumption and ensure that you are willing to accompany them during recovery. Take care of yourself. It is true that your support can be of great help to your partner when it comes to overcoming their addiction, but It is important that you take care that this process does not harm your own physical or mental health.. It is not your job to be their doctor or therapist, abandon your life to take care of theirs, or endure abuse. Make sure you set healthy boundaries that protect your well-being. Seek professional help. Finally, it is the professionals who They can help your partner overcome their addiction, through medication, psychotherapy, and support groups., mostly; Therefore, motivate him to seek help and accompany his process to the extent possible.

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If your partner is an alcoholic, be aware of what you are facing

In short, if your partner has an alcohol addiction, he or she faces a long and complex recovery process. In it Falls and relapses will be frequent, it will be necessary to modify habits and routines and there can be difficult moments. Therefore, it can be helpful for you to obtain information from reliable sources about addictions and their treatment, as well as to have your own psychotherapy space.

Accompanying a person in recovery is exhausting and it can lead us to neglect ourselves or become emotionally overwhelmed. Therefore, do not hesitate to lean on your environment and ask for professional help on an individual basis if you need it.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

American Psychiatric Association. (2013) Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders. (5th ed.). https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.books.9780890425596Irles, D.L. (2001). Alcoholism: A family view. Health and Drugs, 1(1), 113-128.Leggio, L., Kenna, GA, Fenton, M., Bonenfant, E., & Swift, RM (2009). Typologies of alcohol dependence. From Jellinek to genetics and beyond. Neuropsychology review, 19(1), 115-129.

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