How to avoid emotional blackmail in your relationship – 8 steps

One of the practices that is most often used within a relationship is emotional blackmail, a control strategy is carried out to ensure that another person ends up agreeing to your proposals or doing what you ask of them, through techniques that end up causing remorse or increasing feelings of guilt. At unComo.com we want you to be free to make your own decisions, without any type of coercion, therefore, in the following article, we reveal the keys with which you will learn how to avoid emotional blackmail in your relationship. Try not to fall into this game of victimizing attitudes that wear so much, because it is not necessary to think that without the other person you are nothing. You, by yourself, are worth much more!

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Steps to follow:

Before getting into the topic of learning to avoid emotional blackmail you must know what it means. Is about a manipulation that covers up the blackmailer’s need to feel loved; This insecurity in himself causes him to constantly need to get his way and show that his opinions are important and valued by others.

Blackmail begins when the blackmailer begins to condition your partner’s attitudesThat is, it makes you feel remorse for your behaviors or attitudes and increases your feeling of guilt. Definitely: emotional blackmail consists of forcing to want, feel, do or tell the other person what one wants.

As we have commented, emotional blackmail is born from insecurity emotional that causes the need for constant approval from others. Therefore, depending on the degree, there are various types of emotional blackmail that can range from mild manipulation to humiliation, constant criticism or even threats – in more violent profiles. Don’t forget: any type of manipulation taken to the extreme is psychological abuse, since the blackmailer reduces the self-esteem of his partner.

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At OneHowTo we give you some guidelines so that you know how to detect psychological abuse and be able to stop it as soon as possible.

Between the types of emotional blackmail The most common among couples include:

self-punishment: The blackmailer threatens to harm himself if he doesn’t get his way.Silence: It is a common way to show your anger. If you, as a manipulated person, are weak and vulnerable, it will crawlBlame: strategy of making the other person feel guilty, to get them to change their attitude or behavior.Promises: They offer promises to achieve a goal that are almost never fulfilled.Give and take: They always offer something in return in order to keep the other person tied.

Have you already identified if your partner uses emotional blackmail with you as a modus operandi? If the answer is yes or if you do not want these manipulation strategies to be used in your relationship, or future relationship, take note of the following tips to avoid emotional blackmail.

Don’t give in

Emotional blackmail, as we have highlighted, is used in the couple as a tool of control and power over the other person. The main thing to avoid it is never give in to said blackmail, otherwise you will end up becoming a slave to the manipulator.

Don’t be permissive

Get it into your head that emotional blackmail is part of a toxic relationship, so it will not bring you anything positive. These types of relationships wear out and exhaust energy. Don’t let a specific reproach, a specific promise or a specific anger become a habit, a tone in your relationship, since it will end up taking precedence over any other behavior. Remember: manipulation is not love.

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No victimhood

Avoiding emotional blackmail is easy if you surround yourself with positive people who treat you as you deserve, who trust you, who support you. You must stop being a victim to become that person you want to be, without anyone having to get in the way. Your life is yours alone. Live it without ties!

It is also not good to think that all requests are demands or part of emotional blackmail, since we would be wrong. Obviously, we all have the right to reproach a behavior or attitude, to get angry about something that has hurt us… Therefore, it is important to differentiate it. When a partner is often demanding, they are asking for your freedom to be able to make decisions for you, without taking your opinion into account. Here is one of the symptoms of emotional blackmail: when the partner’s feelings and opinions are ignored to achieve your goal.

Last but not least: think about yourself and break the vicious and toxic cycle into which you have entered. It is essential to open your eyes or let those who love you open them. Often, we refuse to listen to what we don’t like, but if you want to break your partner’s manipulative behavior, you must mainly be aware that it is happening. Talk to him about it, use assertive communication so that he can also get out of this type of behavior.

Remember that respect and empathy They make up a fundamental and basic part of any relationship. You have to learn to listen to yourself, explain yourself and understand yourself. Saying what you feel and what you need is positive, but don’t let another person inhibit or coerce you. In case you alone cannot stop the emotional blackmail, do not hesitate to go to a psychologist. A professional can always help you by giving you the keys to get out of psychological abuse.

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