How to answer children’s questions about sex

Out of shame or misinformation, many mothers get irritated when their children ask something about sex. With this, they exclude themselves from an important phase in the lives of young people. Experts indicate how to offer a proper guidance to children and teenagers, without being ashamed or letting the topic become taboo.

Here’s what to say when kids ask you a tough question:

For children over 5 years old

Look! My widdler gets hard! Is there a bone in here?

Son, that happens sometimes. There isn’t a bone inside, it’s the blood that leaves it like that. But soon it will go back to the way it was before.

Why does it get wet between my legs?

Daughter, this happens when you play with the vagina, have you noticed? It’s a natural lubrication of the body, it’s a sign that it’s tasty. But it’s important that you don’t play like that in front of others.

Why does mommy have fur there?

When you grow up, you will also have hair in this area, daughter. By the way, it’s called a vulva.

How does the seed get into the mother?

When a man and a woman have sexual intercourse, they caress and get really close together. He puts his penis in her vagina and the two embrace. Then, a special moment happens: a liquid comes out of the penis, the semen, with thousands of little seeds, the spermatozoa. They enter the woman’s body through the vagina and form an embryo. The embryo develops in the mother’s belly and turns into a baby.

What is boiola?

It’s an ugly name used to disrespect men who love other men and have sex with them. The right thing is to say homosexuals, and offending them is very ugly.

What is this condom used for?

When a man and a woman don’t want to have children, they use this protection, which is a little rubber bag around the penis. It also serves to prevent diseases such as AIDS.

Can I touch daddy’s widdler?

No, you cannot touch an adult’s penis or vagina or let an adult do this to you. If an adult asks you to do this, talk to Mom or Dad.

for teenagers

Mom, when did you lose your virginity?

Since you asked that, I wanted to tell you a little about how I met your father and my fears and anxieties at that time… (tell the story.)

What is the right time to get laid?

There is no right time, the person needs to be emotionally and physically ready for it. It’s wrong to have sex without preparation, just because your colleagues have already had sex.

Does the vagina get wider if the girl has an active sex life?

Not. Although the vagina doubles in size during intercourse, it later returns to the dimensions it had before sex.

Does it hurt to have sex?

It only hurts if the girl isn’t excited enough to begin penetration. In this case, the vagina is not lubricated.

Mom, can I take birth control pills?

How about we talk about the pros and cons? After that, I will support whatever decision you make.

Why talk about sex with your child?

· So that he doesn’t think that sex is something dirty and forbidden, but a gesture of love that should happen naturally and pleasantly at the right time.

· Conversation avoids prejudice. You can teach him, for example, not to call a gay friend a “queer”.

· Informing him about condoms and the pill prevents early pregnancy in the family.

Important!

· When giving the answers to your child, use correct words to designate the sexual organs (penis and vagina).

· Be direct and answer only what was asked.

· Reinforce the notion that sex includes pleasure, responsibility and respect.

· Remind your young child that children cannot have sex. Firmly state that this is something for adults.

SOURCES: Talking to your Son about Sex, by Marcos Ribeiro (ed. Academia), How to Talk about Sex with your Children, by Logan Levkoff (ed. Gente), and 500 Questions about Adolescent Sex, by Laura Muller (Objective Ed.)