How do we become social beings?

We are social beings, creatures destined to live in society. Our life consists of finding our place within the community of human beings. As soon as we are born, someone interacts with us; It takes care of us, feeds us, and in the best of cases a strong bond is established through skin-to-skin contact.

Human beings are social beings by nature and we need contact with other mammals. In recent decades it has been proven that when we are blocked and this blockage is so strong that it prevents us from interacting with other people, Relationships with other mammals can help us be better with ourselves.

All mammals, including us, human beings, group together to survive: mate, breed, defend themselves, feed… Thus, it is usually true that The better tuned the autonomic nervous system of each individual is, the better the relationship with the rest of the members. of our family, tribe, neighborhood, group…

Be social beings

The emotions (emove; ‘move’ in Latin) guide and shape everything we do. Darwin described the common organization of all mammals, including human beings in whom he observed some physical signs of animal emotion such as jealousy.

We can affirm that Humans are social beings because we are sensitive to the subtle emotional changes that occur in the people around us. From a slight change in the tension of an eyebrow to a different curvature of the lips, they can tell us valuable information about the state of others. Furthermore, this is a type of information that we do not process separately, but rather as a whole.

Our body transmits messages to other social beings as if they were clues in a relational game. On the other hand, Our brains are programmed to function as members of a social group.

The social brain

Characteristic aspects of the human being, such as Empathy, imitation, synchrony or language development are largely explained by our “neural wifi”, that is, by our mirror neurons. Thanks to them we can capture the movement, emotional state and intentions of another person.

Stephen Porges (1994) introduced the polyvagal theory based on Darwin’s discoveries. The polyvagal theory (about the vagus nerve) allows us to understand the biology of safety and danger in people. Since we are social beings, There is an interrelation between the visceral experiences of the body and the expression (verbal and corporal) of the people around us.

Porges’ theory explains how Newborns begin the process of becoming social beings through the natural regulation exercised by primary caregivers. Day by day, every coo, every smile, every pampering, stimulates the growth of the synchronicity of your CVV (Central Vagal Complex) with your environment. The CVV controls sucking, swallowing, facial expression and sounds from the larynx, functions that when stimulated are accompanied by sensations of pleasure, connection and security.

Social support and its protective function

Social support doesn’t just mean being around people. When we have to respond to dangerous situations or disasters, Social support is the most powerful protection against stress and trauma that can override people.

The key to social support is reciprocity, that is, being heard and seen, Feeling support in your mind and heart from someone is the best recipe and also the best incentive for us to return this same support. To calm ourselves, heal and grow we need the visceral feeling of security, which is usually felt from the moment we are born and we are in the arms of someone who loves us and cares for us unconditionally.

Children are captivated by faces and voices, they are very sensitive to non-verbal expression (face, posture, tone of voice, physiological changes, incipient action…). John Bowlby observed this innate ability as a product of evolution, which is essential for the survival of these defenseless creatures. Most parents relate to babies in such an instinctive and spontaneous way that they are not aware of how the attunement between them occurs.

Thus, as social beings that we are, The socialization process marks our quality of life. Being able to feel safe with other people is one of the best protectors for our mental health.

Interpersonal Intelligence

According to Howard Gardner, father of the Theory of Multiple Intelligences. The human being, among other intelligences, enjoys the Interpersonal intelligence. What does it consist of? In knowing how others feel. Capture your mood, your emotions, feelings… Somehow, it is captured beyond words.

This intelligence helps us become social beings as it facilitates our understanding of others. Without a doubt, this is an interesting theory since it asks whether human beings are inherently social. According to Gardner, one of the factors for considering an ability or capacity as intelligence is that it has a physiological substrate. Hence If there are areas in our brain that help us socialize, it could be said that we are social beings by nature..

From this intelligence one could also contemplate the empathy, that is, the ability to put ourselves in the shoes of others. Thus, through the development of Interpersonal Intelligence we can become social beings.

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