Don’t let them tell you stories! 10 keys to love without suffering

Can you be romantic and sensible at the same time? It is not easy to answer with a yes. Too many times we suffer for love. Love hurts us, leaves us trapped, confused or sad.

Perhaps it is time to finally claim love as a relationship between equals. To achieve this we must flee from self-deception and, above all, make sure that they always make us feel good. And if not, let’s learn to let go in time…

10 keys to take control in love

Choosing to be the one who directs your own affections and love relationships is a giant step towards well-being and personal freedom. Before loving another, love yourself and love yourself well. Only from there, you will be able to escape in your relationships and enjoy them. We invite you to make a pact with yourself:

1. Make room for it

How much space do you dedicate to romantic love in your life? Find her place among all the affections you have and all the people who make you feel good. If it knows where your site is, it won’t invade everything and you can spend the time it deserves.

2. Learn to accept

If you are very happy, accept it, life is short and there is only one. If, on the other hand, your relationship doesn’t work out, accept that too. If they no longer love you, accept. If you ran out of love, she accepts. If she doesn’t fall for you, she accepts. There is nothing you can do to make someone fall in love, it is not in your power: we cannot change others. We can only choose and evaluate whether or not it is worth sharing life with someone who does not love us.

3. Live in the present

If you are really enjoying a relationship and everything is going well, why create problems for yourself that don’t exist? Live in the present while it lasts and do not hinder your enjoyment. Do not be afraid, love is brave and you don’t have to suffer to live a romance.

4. Dare to say goodbye

If you are starting a relationship or have been in it for years but you are not happy, cut your losses. You will save months of misunderstandings and bad moments. Do not demand or beg for love. If it doesn’t make you happy, if you don’t feel comfortable, if you don’t feel well treated, it’s not worth wasting your time and your strength in a relationship that doesn’t work.

5. Communicate

Don’t waste time and energy thinking about problems. You alone do not solve them by thinking and rethinking. Put your doubts and emotions in common with your partner, take time to talk in depth and from affection, you will see how everything is easier. Talking allows us to vent and gain other perspectives on the issues that concern us.

6. Forget the myths

Don’t ask love for what it can’t give you. The lower your expectations, the fewer disappointments you will have. Putting myths aside can help you build relationships that, without being a story, make you feel good. Being realistic will allow you to enjoy the relationships you have much more, no matter how long they last, because that way you will avoid the fear of being deceived and being frustrated when it’s all over.

7. Stop guessing

Don’t waste time and energy trying to control the future. Your only heritage is the present, and you can only work in the here and now. Imagining happy or sad futures leads us to the world of absurd speculation that is of no use to us. It is not in our hands to control what happens in the present or what will happen later, and there is no other reality than the one you live in now.

8. Evaluate if it is worth it

Distinguishing what is important from what is not so important It can help us a lot to avoid dramas and have bad times. Everything has its space and its time, and recurring obsessions are the least practical and healthy thing there is. It is important to dedicate our energies to what is really worth it, and put aside what is not.

9. Choose well

Move between equals. Power struggles are exhausting and take up a lot of our time and energy. Avoid relating to people who believe they are inferior or superior to you, who submit to or try to dominate you, who deify or crush you. A relationship can only work from equality.

Get together with people who know how to enjoy love and life. Supportive and happy people who, instead of criticizing, always contribute, generous people who want to share, people with the capacity for empathy and optimism, people who treat you well, who love you well at all stages of the relationship, people with which you feel accepted and feel that you can be yourself.

10. Love yourself a lot

Learn to know yourself, be your best friend and companion, enjoy the time you spend alone, practice self-criticism, learn to work with your emotions and for your well-being, always try to use common sense… These tools They will help you write your love stories with their happy endings.