Differences between self-esteem and self-respect

Self-esteem and self-respect are two concepts closely linked but that present important differences. Above all, both are absolutely essential in order to achieve fulfillment and freedom with respect to our own lives. If we lack any of these ingredients we will be exposed to abuse from others but, above all, from ourselves.

It is not in vain that self-esteem and the strategies to develop it are gaining more and more importance in our societies. We need to love ourselves to love and be loved. Nevertheless, Self-respect is, on many occasions, the great forgotten within the guidelines to achieve self-love. Therefore, in this article we are going to know these two terms and their differences in depth.

Self-esteem and self-respect

Let’s start by offering a precise definition of both concepts, which helps us understand their true meaning. We can consider self-esteem as the set of perceptions that a person has about themselves and the evaluation they make of them.. It is, therefore, about how we see ourselves (with our appearance, character and personality) and the assessment we make of that image.

Thus, an individual may perceive himself or herself as attractive, intelligent, and charismatic and positively evaluate those qualities. On the other hand, a person can be seen as shy, clumsy, and excessively thin and give a negative valence to these aspects. In this way, the self-esteem of the first will be positive while that of the second will not be so positive.

On the other hand Self-respect can be defined as the degree to which a subject shows respect for himself, his opinions, needs and feelings. It is about the consideration that an individual has of himself as someone valuable and worthy. A fact that is reflected in concrete actions such as the ability to establish limits, express oneself assertively and treat one’s body and its emotions with consideration.

Differences between self-esteem and self-respect

As can be seen from the previous definitions, these are terms with evident theoretical differences and different practical implications. While self-esteem is about evaluation, self-respect is about acceptance. In the first case we talk about making a positive or negative assessment of ourselves, in the second we talk about considering ourselves deserving simply because of who we are.

Self-esteem corresponds to what I think and feel about myself, and self-respect corresponds to the way I treat myself. However, we are talking about closely related concepts. When you have low self-esteem, it is extremely common for self-respect to be conspicuous by its absence.

If I have a poor self-image and evaluate myself negatively, this will translate into abusive behavior on my part that will include tolerance for abuse from others.. Those who do not love themselves do not feel they have the right to raise their voices or defend their needs. He perceives himself as lacking, insufficient and inferior, so he tends to be complacent and submissive to obtain external approval that he does not give himself.

On the contrary, Those who enjoy healthy self-esteem treat themselves with love and consideration and demand the same treatment from those around them. When someone loves each other, they inevitably respect each other and demand respect. However, the relationship also works in the opposite direction: in order to make a positive assessment of yourself you have to learn to accept yourself unconditionally.

Don’t evaluate yourself, accept yourself

Clearly, as humans, we all have flaws and make mistakes. We are not perfect, but we are always worthy. You don’t need to possess the best qualities to start respecting yourself. While self-esteem asks you for reasons to love yourself, self-respect loves you unconditionally.

That is why you will never reach true plenitude until you begin to accept yourself with your lights and your shadows. Until you are able to value your virtues and assume your defects without guilt. You have the right to be imperfect and to be happy. Work on yourself, improve yourself, develop yourself, but always keep in mind that your dignity is non-negotiable. It belongs to you from the moment you were born.

So start taking care of yourself, prioritizing yourself, listening to your needs and defending your rights. With each step you will discover your intrinsic value, You will increase the esteem you feel for yourself, not because you are perfect, but simply because you are.

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