Can the wife of a narcissist be happy? 10 things you need to know

Being the wife of a narcissist is no easy task.

They are lovely men, we know.

Although their manipulative ways can make their partner feel insecure or insufficient.

And their excessive love for themselves can make it difficult to have a relationship with them.

But can the wife of a narcissist be happy?

Here I will reveal 10 secrets that you need to know.

Also, I will help you understand if your husband is really a narcissist or not.

You are not alone, many women have understood how to carry out these relationships.

Do you dare to try it?

Can the wife of a narcissist be happy?

Yes, the wife of a narcissist can be happy. Although many say otherwise.

The mistake is usually in labeling all narcissistic people equally.

Having narcissistic traits does not mean that the personality is 100% narcissistic

That is, that he has a narcissistic personality disorder.

So, to claim that a wife is unhappy because of being with a narcissist is a bit grotesque.

It all depends on his partner’s narcissistic traits and how much he influences his wife.

That does not mean that it can be difficult to have a relationship with someone who has these traits.

Why is it difficult to be the wife of a narcissist?

A study published in the American Psychological Association states that,

“Narcissism is related to romantic success in short-term contexts. For example, dating or relationships in early stages, but also with problems in long-term committed relationships.»

In other words, narcissists are excellent seducers at the beginning of any relationship.

But being the wife of a narcissist can be complicated and exhausting.

Because the narcissist contains a great contradiction in himself.

In fact, the study mentions that the difficult part of being the partner of a narcissist is the

“paradoxical patterns that characterize people with narcissistic personality traits (for example: being charming but aggressive).”

Because?

The narcissist can be seductive and passionate.

And the wife can feel loved and wanted at certain times.

But these happy moments cannot be compared to a healthy relationship.

That is, a life in which both support each other to build a happy life.

Because the narcissist puts his own needs and desires above those of his partner.

What can lead the wife to feel ignored, insecure and dissatisfied.

And in the long run, these dynamics can affect a wife’s self-esteem.

Of course it is possible for the wife of a narcissist to find moments of happiness in their relationship.

But whether she maintains the bond in a healthy way will depend entirely on how much she values ​​herself.

And who really takes the reins of the relationship.

10 things you need to know to find out if your narcissist loves you

Here are 10 things that might help you figure out if you’re happy being the wife of a narcissist.

Think about your relationship and ask yourself the following; but remember: be honest!

Do you feel appreciated and valued by your partner, or do you feel that you are ignored and not important in the relationship? Can you express your feelings and needs openly in the relationship, or do you feel like you have to hide your emotions to avoid conflict? Do you feel emotionally secure in the relationship, or do you feel like you are constantly on your guard and worried about how your partner will react? Do you feel like you are in control of your own life and make your own decisions, or do you feel like you are being controlled by your partner? Do you feel free to pursue your own interests and goals, or do you feel like you have to put your partner’s interests above your own? Do you feel comfortable and respected in social situations with your partner, or do you feel like you are constantly being embarrassed or humiliated in public? Do you feel safe in your own skin and confident in yourself, or do you feel like your self-esteem has been eroded by the relationship? Do you feel that there is a balance in the relationship, where both take into account the needs and desires of the other, or do you feel that your partner always has the last word and their needs are the only important ones? Do you feel happy and satisfied in your sexual relationship, or do you feel that you are being used or undervalued by your partner? Do you feel generally happy in your life, or do you feel that your relationship is keeping you unhappy and joyless?

If your answers to most of these questions are no, it’s time to act.

As Eleanor Roosevelt says:

“No one has the right to make you feel inferior without your consent.”

How is a narcissistic person?

Contrary to what everyone thinks, narcissism is not a negative thing.

Since we all have a share of narcissism; It helps us stay on our feet.

For example, to be able to achieve goals, make ourselves respected and even have a healthy self-esteem.

The problem is when these traits are excessive.

When this happens, the person may have narcissistic personality disorder, also called TPN.

Some of the common characteristics of a person with narcissistic traits are:

grandiosity or arrogance, lack of empathy, control and
need for constant attention.

Are there different degrees of narcissism?

Yes, there are different degrees of narcissism.

And narcissism can manifest itself in different ways in different people.

Narcissistic personality disorder is the extreme of narcissism.

And it is characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, lack of empathy, need for admiration or manipulation.

However, not all people with narcissistic traits have narcissistic personality disorder.

Some people may have a healthy sense of self-esteem or self-confidence.

Although they can also have narcissistic traits such as:

a need for attention,
a tendency to talk about themselves excessively
an occasional lack of empathy towards others.

Also, some people may have narcissistic traits in specific situations.

Or as a reaction to a trauma or a stressful situation.

For example:

In situations of crisis or danger, it is common for people to show a heightened sense of self-confidence.

Or have a need to control the situation, which can seem narcissistic.

Therefore, it is important to evaluate a person’s attitudes to know if they are really narcissistic or not.

How does a narcissist behave with his partner?

If it’s not clear to you whether your husband has narcissistic traits, try the following to find out.

1) Excessive self-esteem

A narcissist has extremely high self-esteem and feels superior to others. He can be arrogant, self-centered, and overbearing.

2) Lack of empathy

They do not have the ability to put themselves in another’s place and understand their emotions. They can be insensitive and careless with the feelings of others.

3) Need for attention

They seek constant attention and admiration from others. They may talk only about themselves and not pay attention to their partner’s needs or feelings. They tend to want to be the “center of the universe.”

4) Handlers

They tend to use deceit, lies, or manipulation to achieve their goals. They may make false promises and not keep them, or blame their partner for their own mistakes.

5) They don’t take charge

They often do not take responsibility for their actions or behaviors. They may blame others for their mistakes or deny that they made a mistake. This makes them unable to tolerate criticism.

6) Abusive behaviors

They can be physically, emotionally, or verbally abusive. They can devalue, humiliate or despise their partner.

7) Grandiosity

They see themselves as “great” and may exaggerate their achievements or abilities. They can expect to be treated in a special way or have special privileges.

8) Insecurity

Despite their confident exterior, narcissists can be highly insecure and need constant, external validation.

9) Control

They may try to control their partner’s life, including their behavior, activities, and social relationships like friends, work, etc.

10) Extreme Mood Swings

They may have sudden mood swings and disproportionate emotional reactions to situations they are not comfortable with.

eleven) Jealousy

They need to get maximum attention from their partner.

If they don’t make it, they are jealous.

12) Envy

If they fail at something, they justify it with envy.

For example: that you have been fired from work because they envy your success and do not want to compete with you.

13) Infidelity

The narcissist needs the other, that is, his partner.

And if that person doesn’t give him what he needs (to remind him how wonderful he is) he will look for someone to give him that reinforcement.

14) Dependency

They need their partner to “depend on him.”

Adore and admire him or, better yet, keep the infatuation phase alive.

How to deal with a narcissistic partner

Dealing with a narcissistic partner can be extremely difficult and stressful.

Therefore, I offer you some tips that could help you deal with this situation:

Accept it:

Recognizing that your partner has a narcissistic personality disorder can be difficult.

But it is the first important step in dealing with the situation.

Once you understand his behavior, you’ll be in a better position to deal with what’s upsetting you or doing wrong.

Identify what makes you choose it:

Ask yourself why I choose to be with someone like this?

What is it that does not allow me to leave it?

Beyond love, there must be something else that invites you to stay by his side.

Maybe he represents some need that you have without covering, if so, what is it?

Set limits:

Narcissists can be very controlling.

Setting clear limits and communicating them is important to protect your self-esteem and emotional well-being.

You must be clear about what you are willing to tolerate and what is not and what hurts you.

Discuss it with him if necessary, but don’t stop setting limits as soon as possible.

It is not as strong as it seems:

Remember that he is like that because deep down he harbors great insecurity.

Their narcissism is a shell to face the world without fighting their fears or internal conflicts.

Don’t believe everything he does or says.

And, if he allows you, discuss it with him.

Maybe you can help him realize that there is more than one way to deal with things.

Don’t blame yourself:

Narcissists can be very adept at making people feel responsible for their own actions.

It is important to remember that you are not responsible for their behavior.

And that you don’t have to take responsibility for your actions. Never!

Seek support:

Dealing with a narcissistic partner can be isolating and lonely.

Seek support from friends, family, or mental health professionals.

Anyone you trust who will listen can help you deal with the situation.

Watch your way of speaking:

Don’t fall into his trap of giving him constant attention and applause.

If you praise him, let it be because you really want to do it and not out of inertia.

You will only be feeding what must work to improve.

If you expose criticism, do it with respect and delicacy.

You can even remind him that there is nothing wrong with…