Behaviors of a person who underestimates himself

Underestimating others is quite common, but so is underestimating yourself. Both behaviors are equally harmful. They erode our relationships, they take away momentum from our personal growth and our well-being. In this way, few psychological values ​​are as necessary as investing appropriately in our self-esteem.

Confidence, appreciation and value in ourselves is a precious resource that guarantees more than just happiness. The person who has a healthy esteem for that figure that is reflected in his mirror every day will fight with greater vigor for his own goals. You will feel worthy of everything you achieve, invest appropriately in your relationships, and enjoy greater satisfaction.

We all deserve to enjoy this exceptional psychological tendon. However, as Albert Ellis pointed out to us, self-acceptance is not self-esteem. That is, it is not enough to “accept” ourselves. We have to value ourselves. This, as curious as it may seem to us, is not something we do properly. Hence it is appropriate to know when a person underestimates themselves.

The person who underestimates himself rejects compliments

The modesty It can be a trait that characterizes you. Now, the truth is that this modesty contains how much you underestimate yourself. A “it’s no big deal“, “it’s not that big of a deal“, “I don’t mind” can be a real problem.
Most of the time, our receptiveness to compliments is a clear reflection of our self-esteem. This is what a study carried out by psychologist David R. Kille, from the University of Waterloo, Canada, shows us. In that way, Kind words and recognitions make us feel uncomfortable because they contradict our own opinion of ourselves.

We don’t take them seriously or we simply don’t know how to react to a compliment.

You make references to other people

If you are a person who underestimates yourself, your way of speaking will be characterized by always referring to other people. For example, “my husband says…”, “my teacher said that…”. This denotes a lack of confidence in what one is saying. In fact, if you work in front of the public or as a salesperson, your credibility will be conspicuous by its absence.

With this you also support your opinions on others, “ask that person if you don’t believe me”, “isn’t what Ernesto said true?” Things like this will make us very vulnerable and insecure.

You avoid thinking about yourself first

When was the last time you allowed yourself a treat? People who underestimate themselves tend to think that they cannot afford certain licenses. Aspects such as prioritizing ourselves over others at a given moment, giving ourselves time, some detail or whim are something that is difficult for us when self-esteem is low.

Not everything has to be for others, you deserve good things too! You have the right (and obligation) to give yourself the importance that you deserve first. Just one time! Try it. It’s not being selfish, it’s loving yourself.

You think that others see you in a negative way

When will you stop thinking that those people who laugh are laughing at you? A boy or girl who asks you out already causes the phrase “this won’t last long, when he meets me he will distance himself from me” to jump into your thoughts. A sincere compliment seems like alms to you, something they tell you so you don’t feel so bad about your physique.

Is safe. When you realize that there is sincerity in the words of others, that you are not the target of laughter you will become strong and gain security. Don’t think things that really aren’t. You’re underestimating yourself. Do not let that happen!

You don’t think you are unique, you don’t see anything special in yourself.

Another of the thoughts and behaviors of people who underestimate themselves is believing that they are not the only ones. For example, following the example of A person who asks another person out or gives them a gift, the person who underestimates themselves will think that they do it with everyone.

“It all starts like this”, “I’m not the only one”, “the others are better”, these thoughts are very common. Here the insecurity is evident once again. You have to believe in yourself. So, And even if you don’t believe it, no two people are the same.. Never think that they treat you like someone else.

pejorative words

You have already thought of the nicknames they give you! Why do you think that way? Those words that arise in your mind, those pejorative words that cause you to put them on because you put them on yourself, do not help you!

Many of the behaviors of people who underestimate themselves are similar to those done by people who need to feel pain. I have this weakness, this problem and instead of running away I rejoice in it no matter how much it hurts. It’s not appropriate.

We hope that these behaviors have helped you determine how a person who underestimates themselves behaves. Have you discovered that you do it sometimes? Find a solution, consult with a specialized professional to work on your self-esteem. Approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy can help you.

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