How long does it take to fall in love? One month? One year? Or can you fall in love at first sight? In fact, there is more than one right answer to this.

You might know that when you came looking for an answer to “how long does it take to fall in love?” who wouldn’t find a simple answer. I can tell you the averages based on research, but I can’t tell you that it will take you exactly three weeks for YOU to fall in love.

But the moment of falling in love depends on many things. Love is not a simple thing. And romantic love is even more complicated.

Sure, a parent can fall in love with their child when they see him or feel him in the womb, but romantic love is not the same thing.

Romantic love requires time and investment in the relationship. That’s why I can’t give you a timeline for falling in love. Every person and every relationship varies.

SEE TOO:

• Reasons (not so pretty) to say “I love you”

How long does it take to fall in love on average?

According to research, approximately one to three months is the period when most people say ‘I love you’. But, this is so widespread it’s ridiculous. Which people were surveyed? Was it generation Y or the generation of the 60s? Were these people who met online or in person?

There are so many things that go into love, is there really an average? Think about it. When a class takes the same test, there is an average score. This average makes sense because everyone learned the same material and took the same test.

But love is much more complicated. Each person has lived different things, has different pasts and different hopes for the future.

So the amount of time it takes to fall in love, on average, is kind of pointless…

If everyone met in person after talking to someone online for a week and saw each other twice a week for three months on similar dates, this average might be a little more understandable. But some people have been friends for years before starting a romantic relationship. Others see each other every day for a month after their first date, and some see each other once a month or even less.

And sometimes you can feel in love when you really aren’t. Finding someone and connecting with that person instantly can mimic feelings of true love. Sex can also release endorphins that mimic these feelings.

A Cosmopolitan article listed 13 people’s quotes about when they knew they were in love. Only the top three on the list ranged from one month, three months to one year. Others said it after a week, and one even said it on the first date.

Each response from these couples in their 20s, 30s, and 40s varied greatly.

That’s why the moment of love is so complicated. Some people aren’t sure what they feel when they’re in love. Others know this, but deny it to protect themselves. There is too much complication and confusion when it comes to love to give a standard answer.

SEE TOO:

• 8 Situations You Must Live With Your Loved One Before The First “I Love You”

How do people fall in love?

Falling in love has no magic formula. If you do this, this and that, will you fall in love?… No.

People fall in love in many ways. Sometimes they bond over common interests, like sports or music, and other times they have intense chemistry. Some even fall in love when they have nothing in common.

Romance like flowers, candles and chocolate can heighten feelings of love for some people, while others go on adventures or stay on the couch when they fall in love.

I fell in love with my wife in a probably pretty common way. We meet online and go on dates, watch movies together and meet each other’s families. I knew I was in love for about three to four months, but I didn’t say anything for six.

There wasn’t a particular moment that changed things or let me know, it just happened naturally🎵.

Then again, even the “how” when it comes to love is up to each person.

SEE TOO:

• What really attracts us to people?

How do I know I’m in love?

Unless you can measure your oxytocin levels, it can be hard to know for sure if you’re in love. You might say, “I’ve been with this person for so many months and I’m happy, so I must be in love…”

Or you can convince yourself that you’re in love because you want to be in love—you’d be surprised how often that happens.

There are many signs that you are in love. Things like wanting to share good news and bad news with this person instantly or wanting to say “I love you” can be a sign that you are, in fact, in love. Sometimes friends even notice a change in their behavior.

Some people also don’t admit they’re in love until their partner does. This can make things difficult because not everyone falls in love at the same rate, even in a relationship.

When can I say I’m really in love?

This is another big question with a complicated answer. You can say you’re in love when you feel it. Most people would say “when you know, you know…” There are no rules about this. There’s no timeline or relationship milestone you need to hit to say ‘I love you’ and be sincere.

Sure, you might regret it one day or look back and realize you weren’t in love when you thought you were, but that doesn’t change how you felt in the moment.

I was in love with my wife in high school. It was a completely different kind of love than I feel today, but it was love nonetheless. I also dated someone in my early twenties for six months and was convinced I loved him. Looking back, it certainly wasn’t. I said it because I thought that was how I felt at the time.

So as long as you think that’s what you feel, you can say it. Love is complicated and confusing. There is no perfect formula for love, knowing when you are in love or when is the right time to say it. It all comes down to you and your relationship.

I can advise you, however, to don’t rush love. Enjoy the process of falling in love and developing these feelings. You don’t need to rush to say or feel it quickly because you’re afraid of losing the person. Love is something to be enjoyed in the moment. It’s something that looks good and scary at the same time.

Love may feel like you’re doing something wrong, but whatever feels right to you is right. There is no comprehensive advice I can offer you to make love easier. Because love and falling in love are so individual, you can’t look for a quick fix or a broad answer. You need to examine your own situation. You need to get into your own feelings and identify them.

This is probably not the answer you were expecting, but if you made it this far in the article, I hope you understood it a little better. There is no one answer to falling in love. There is no perfect timeline for love. There’s nothing perfect about love, and that’s what makes it so perfect.

So stop worrying about timing and just enjoy the trip of a lifetime. Falling in love is not science; although it can be argued that it is. Falling in love is magical and should be treated as such.

SEE TOO:

• 8 Reasons You Need More Hugs (Science Proves It)

Photo: Pexels