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A psychologist tells how to better understand yourself and others

A good psychologist is able to tell you how to deal with many difficulties in life. Some professionals not only help their patients in individual consultations, but also share useful tips on the Internet. For example, psychologist Anton Shutov shares a lot of important things on his account of twitterin addition to the knowledge accumulated during the years of practice.

O awesome.club learned a lot of useful information and is eager to share it with you.

some useful tips

Stress is not only our enemy, it also helps us to live. If we were to eliminate all stress from a person’s life, giving him absolute comfort, feelings such as melancholy and anguish would soon arise. Furthermore, the vital forces would drop to almost zero and a severe depression would overtake the person. A mild and constant level of stress lifts our spirits. Stop for a moment and take a deep breath. Then exhale slowly. Slow and deep breathing is able to relax and nourish the blood with oxygen, help you focus better on what really matters, reduce the effects of stress, bring you back to the present moment and help focus on yourself.

To increase awareness, i.e. clarity of thoughts, active awareness and presence of life, psychologists advise trying as many new activities as possible: classes, walking tours, new subjects, recipes, leisure methods, etc. This quickly accelerates alertness and strengthens. When in life (in love or not) you face betrayal, remember this unpleasant circumstance: treason is considered treason only on one side (from the accuser), on the other, everything is justified, from beginning to end. Don’t waste your time with meaningless discussions, just walk away. If you are at a dead end in the search for a solution to a problem, put it aside for a while, switch your attention to something else. The analysis and enumeration of options will not stop, they will continue in your subconscious. And this “work” will soon bring you a result. It is important not to torture yourself and sometimes even give up on finding a solution, that it will come to you when you least expect it.

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If you are a creative person, remember that sometimes solitude is necessary in the professional part. The weekly period of “non-communication” and silence allows us to strengthen the internal analysis, better form the necessary ideas, approaches and perceptions. be alone for good
in a while. If you go to a psychologist, then do not rush to analyze all your important problems at once. It is better to choose one of the most relevant ones and start working on it. One topic per session. Most likely, after working on the main theme, you will begin to notice the rest in a completely different way.
Sometimes over-analyzing is our enemy. Shutting down the head is a powerful skill. Remember the tightrope walker who works at great heights. He needs concentration and scattered awareness. If thoughts of him go through the corners of fear, the risk of falling begins to increase significantly. The reality is that painkillers not only relieve physical pain, but also emotional pain. This has been demonstrated by official studies. It’s a true fact. Don’t play with them.

How to get to know yourself and others better

When you repeat a word over and over and it starts to lose more and more of its usual meaning and sound, this is called “semantic satiety”. Everyone has done this, right? When you go to lunch with your colleagues, once you finish eating, wait a while while they are still finishing their meal. While this is not always the case, it is said that the speed of eating may be related to a person’s level of anxiety (the faster, the greater the anxiety). A person who swings his legs at a rapid pace, or who taps his foot rhythmically on the floor, is generally considered to be nervous. But this is not always the case. Most of the time, it can indicate an inner desire to switch to another type of activity, impatience with other people, with oneself or with circumstances.

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If you are alone on the street and meet a group of dogs, they will most likely attack you to train the methods of attacking a lone person and show them to the younger members of the pack. The same thing happens with people. This is called bullying. Remember school days and bullies. Adolescent bullying is the harassment of a child by peers at school or in class. First advice: that the child does not show reactions to the attacks, because that is what they are aimed at. Second advice: do not interfere as a parent to scold the whole class and only punish bullies, this will only make things worse.
When a person touches their nose during a conversation, it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re lying. Perhaps, without realizing it, he is just trying to put a barrier between the interlocutor and the listener.because you are feeling a lack of confidence for some reason.

about people

You arrive in a room full of people, where you need to speak or deliver a message, but the crowd is still talking. Do not rush to call people’s attention to silence. Go to your seat and stay there, saying nothing. After some time, the noise will disappear on its own and the attention will be all yours. There is a clear rule. If one of your acquaintances speaks ill of everyone they know, do not doubt that, as soon as you turn your back, that person will speak ill of you as much as he has spoken of others. It’s infallible. Get away from this type of person as much as you can. They bring no benefit to our lives. To feel more togetherness and intimacy with a loved one, watch your breathing and adapt yours to their rhythm. This subtle union creates a mysterious and pleasant fusion effect.

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Try an experiment with your friends or colleagues: put a piece of paper in front of men and women and ask them to draw a bicycle. You will roll with laughter looking at the pictures. Men will draw a real mechanical model and women… You will see for yourself. this is
the difference in our way of thinking.
To quickly become someone’s trusted person during a first conversation, ask 10 simple questions about your favorite field of interest. He will respond, and during communicative contact, his predisposition towards you will begin to gain strength. Dale Carnegie wrote about it. It works. Here are some tips in case you pass by a group of potentially aggressive people: a) keep your fists clenched; b) slightly close your eyes; c) look at the group calmly and without haste; d) don’t show fear, just continue on your way in the same calm way as before; e) do not react to shouting or insults.

A stranger doesn’t know you, introduces himself as a psychic or something and starts saying some things that ring true to him, perfectly nailing everything he mentions. This is called the Forer effect: these are general characteristics selected in a special way, it just seems that they are about you. Astrology works the same way. When a patient is brought to a psychologist by parents/spouses/friends, it is guaranteed that the treatment will have no effect. A patient who did not come on his own will oppose with all his might, resist and be indifferent, since he has no motives of his own, they are only external. It is an option doomed to fail.
All you need to focus on in a relationship is honesty and openness., no matter who they are: romantic relationships, spouses, consultants, colleagues, friends, relatives, parents, children, travelers on the same bus across the city. Because that is the essence of any partnership.

What advice did you find most helpful? Because? Tell us, leave your comment!


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