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9 Ways to Respond to Rudeness Without Lowering Your Level

You can always find a decent way out of situations where someone intentionally insults or torments you. As writer Mariam Petrosyan says, “There are many ways to send a person to hell without resorting to foul language.” It’s worth getting to know them to avoid giving the impression of being rude.

O awesome.club shows you how to respond to an insult without ever lowering your level of intelligence or education, that is, in a sensible and respectful way.

1. Keep calm

The purpose of a thick person’s attacks is to make him lose his mind and to release a strong charge of negative energy. If you succeed, you’ve lost. So don’t give these energetic vampires joy. Keep a cool head, don’t fall for violent reactions or humiliating excuses. Speak calmly, relaxed and, at the same time, clearly and firmly. This will discourage your interlocutor and deprive you of the opportunity to play with your emotions.

Example: the employee has no change and responds with anger and bad temper. Don’t lower yourself to the level of emotions in the same way. Focus on the essence of the problem. Calmly tell him that having coins is a task for which the store is responsible and that the customer should not be blamed, much less with rude expressions. In case of an inappropriate reaction, you can always complain, call your immediate superior or go directly to the store manager.

2. Try to understand

Imagine a hedgehog with sharp spines: a small frightened animal. Project this image onto your rude interlocutor: in this way, he will adopt a condescending position, trying to understand the situation. Then you can ask him questions that will assuage his anger. Pay attention to the causes of the aggression, to what makes no sense, to the fact that it has nothing to do with the essence of what happened.

Example: “Have you had a hard day?”, “Why are you offending me?”, “What else do you have on your mind?”, “Why are you acting like this?”, “Why do you want to pretend? really is?” And so on. By thinking about your questions, the person will understand the absurdity of the situation.

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3. Bring the conflict to a constructive tone

If the words of the one who offends you are fair, but said aggressively, then cling to rationality. Explain that you understand your point of view on the matter: such a reaction will show that it is reason that speaks for you, while the brute is guided only by emotions. Having constructive dialogue is a much stronger and completely correct option. Even those unfamiliar with the notions of kindness and courtesy will respond to your words with respect.

Example: you parked the wrong car creating trouble for another driver and your reaction is extremely nervous. Just apologize and tell him that in the future you will be more attentive when choosing a parking space.

4. Show the person’s true face

Nobody likes to hear the truth. Therefore, a good option is to redirect the focus of attention from you to the person who said something unpleasant to you. That is, show him your own reflection. The response will also be emotional, but at the same time it will not descend to the level of impoliteness. You can say directly, or allegorically and metaphorically, play with fantasy.

Example: “No one can say they had a good education. There’s nothing more to add.” “You always have something bad to say, don’t you?”, “It’s a shame pills against rudeness haven’t been invented yet”, “Being rude doesn’t do you any favors”. Furthermore, these phrases must be said with impeccable calm.

5. Shine skillfully

Humor and sarcasm get in the way of the surly, who is taken by surprise and makes them feel uncomfortable. The simplest option is to laugh in response to your discourtesy. And a complex stunt would be the following: take advantage of self-irony, give an ingenious and quick answer, and even praise your interlocutor. Or give an answer that makes you mad. In this way, you will make your attacker laugh, relaxing and making the environment lighter.

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Example: Recall a story where you felt ridiculous. Remembered? Laugh at it! Only the strong can do it. Someone attacks you with severe accusations? Take your theses to the absurd, acknowledging them with irony. For example, for a comment like, “Where do you think you’re going? Don’t you see anything around you?” Answer: “Yes, I certainly don’t see anything. It’s strange that you didn’t notice: just today I forgot my glasses at home.” Or simply respond sarcastically: “It didn’t take long for your words to bother me. But not this time”.

6. Show courtesy

If you are faced with an incorrigible idiot, absolute courtesy and excessive patience can help you. A smile and friendly communication represent a very unusual shape for people of this profile, which can confuse them. Also, by not receiving a supposed negative answer, according to the script provided by the stupid, he will lose interest in the discussion. At the same time you will have the opportunity to take charge of the situation.

Example: an employee at a clothing store is anxious: “Is it going to take a long time? You need to make up your mind.” His response: “Can you please bring me that model too?”. If the impolite is a tough nut to crack, he may pronounce the words a little louder than usual.

7. Become a burden

The method will be especially useful for those who often have to deal with dissatisfied customers at work. The reasons for dissatisfaction are not always justified or presented inappropriately. What can be done? In response to unpleasant treatment, follow your line without deviating: repeat the same thing in dry, formal language. In real life, outside of work, it also works.

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Example: Very often, such attacks are received by administrators of different groups on social networks. To which they firmly reply: “You have violated rule X, so it is necessary to block you for a while. If you insult the administrator, the block will be extended.”

9. Ignore

None of this helps you? Or do you feel like you can’t contain yourself anymore? Cut the nasty conversation. That way, he won’t lower the level by creating a scandal and, at the same time, he will show that he shouldn’t talk to you like that. This is a universal form of psychological protection, suitable for all types of aggression. Especially if you’re dealing with a mentally disturbed person or someone you don’t need to maintain any kind of relationship with.

Example: you refused to give alms to an antisocial and intoxicated character. He screams and threatens him. Pay no more attention and get on with your stuff. But ignore it properly. Don’t reveal “emotion”, as if swallowing the offense silently, but keep the image of a successful person who doesn’t have time to pay attention to small annoyances.

Bonus: “I love you”

If the argument is with a loved one, it is probably worth abandoning all psychological manipulations and simply saying to yourself, “Stop, that’s enough!”. And to his beloved: “Yes, for me this question is important. But at the same time, of course I love you. And I would like to solve the problem without spoiling our relationship. “Good and love as an answer to something negative will calm the anger, and together you can find a way out of the situation that caused the conflict.

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