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7 reasons why men date some women and marry others

I think we’ve all witnessed, at least once in our lives, situations where we see a couple break up after long years together and, soon after, the man ends up marrying another woman (with some speed). This kind of behavior makes us wonder why some couples don’t walk down the aisle after being together for years, while others can get engaged the “day after” their first date.

we, from awesome.clubwe try to understand, in this case, the male logic and dissect an issue that torments hundreds of women around the world.

1. There is no such thing as a “suitable” woman. The main thing is to find the person at the right time

In one of the social networks, an opinion was published that men marry not when they find the “love of life”, but when they are ready to create a family. A Twitter user was interested in this theory and he requested that the men themselves comment on the matter. Almost unanimously, the “gentlemen” of the network admitted that everyone has regretted, at least once, ending a relationship. This did not, however, stop them from marrying someone else who had the same intentions at the right time.

There is another recurring situation that leads them to get married. If a man loses the woman he loves to someone else, he may end up marrying someone else. In this case, it is as if there are no more opportunities left, and the only solution to fill that “lack” is to try to find the same feeling in another person (we can even say that this does not refer only to men). Therefore, it is as if he is not waiting for the “right” person, and both the ring and the request will go to the woman who is next to him at the right time, given that both are already psychologically prepared to live a life together.

According to scientific studies, the best age to raise a family is during the range of 28 to 32 years. After this age, the chances of getting married decrease considerably, and after 42 they are even more reduced.

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2. Don’t build a family based on physical attraction

Studies have shown that the happiest couples are those in which a woman is more attractive (according to local beauty standards) than her partner. But, as John T. Molloy noted in his book Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others: The Fascinating Research That Can Land You the Husband of Your Dreams🇧🇷Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others: The Fascinating Research That Might Lead You to the Husband of Your Dreams, in free translation) it is important that the appearance of the chosen woman is not too revealing. John asked more than 3,500 men to describe their brides, and only 20% of them used appearance-related adjectives (“luxurious”, “attractive”, “sexy”). The other 80% talked about character and personality traits. Men noticed that the care with the appearance is an important point for the attraction, but this is not a determining factor. The most popular opinion was this: a woman should dress in such a way as to be appropriate for any kind of situation.

3. The opinion of friends and parents can influence a possible marriage

Even though the man appears to be very independent, the choice of the “ideal” woman will be directly or indirectly influenced by the opinion of people close to him. So friends play an important role in the acquaintance phase, and their opinion can certainly speed up the dating process. Parental approval, then, can be decisive for a proposal of marriage and living together. It is worth mentioning that it is not uncommon for the woman that the child takes home does not in any way match the image of the “perfect” daughter-in-law that the parents (especially the mother) have dreamed of.

4. The man is sure that the woman is satisfied with everything

To be more specific, certain women say that they are in agreement with the conditions of the relationship, and that they “do not need” to get married. If the partner really thinks that way, and the partner does too, great, they’re both on the same page. If this is not her real intention, she may find herself in a relationship where he “does nothing”, because he does not understand that he needs to do something. Many men, we can say, do not “read between the lines” and this can generate great dissatisfaction for the woman. Therefore, at some point, she may lose the patience to wait and end the relationship. If the man finds a woman in the future who has more clarity in her intentions, he may end up marrying more quickly, to prevent her from leaving like the previous one.

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Psychologists argue that couples who don’t fight early in a relationship don’t have much of a chance of working out in the future. You should put aside shyness and fear when expressing your intentions and wishes to your partner. Certain women who prefer to remain silent about their real desires are less likely to achieve a lasting relationship. 73% of future wives confessed that they had to persistently “press” their boyfriends and insist on marriage, rather than waiting for their initiative.

5. Living together decreases the chances of getting married by 2 times

Psychologists warn that women should be relatively wary of the idea of ​​moving in together before marriage. Most men propose to the woman they love within 22 months of starting the relationship. After that, the chances start to decrease by 20%. After 3 years, this number goes to 50% and after 7 years of relationship the probability of getting married is almost nil.

And let’s not forget the differences in perception: many women still believe that living together is the first step towards marriage. For many men, it’s the opposite. They tend to “forget” the need to formalize the status that they already form a “family”.

6. A woman is convenient for a while, but not for the future

This also occurs. Man wants to get married, but only after achieving certain success in life. After getting promoted at work, buying an apartment or stabilizing yourself financially. At the same time, he doesn’t want to be alone in this difficult period as he seeks to achieve his goals, and so he looks for a person to support him during this time, but with no intention of keeping her in the future.

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A “comfortable” woman, without great demands and always willing to make concessions, would not be a person he seeks for life. It doesn’t cause euphoria or a desire to try new things. In such benevolent women, therefore, dependency is not created, as is the case with the most defiant. If a man becomes successful, he wants to stay at his peak, and for such situations he would need a person who challenges and encourages him so that both can develop both in the relationship and individually.

7. Not all relationships should end in marriage

From childhood, girls are used to the idea that any boy who gives them attention could potentially be their future “fiancé”. We often hear jokes from relatives asking when they are going to take pictures and eat cake at their wedding. Over the years, this question becomes more and more pertinent. And so girls grow up with one focus: if the relationship is long, then the outcome is one: creating a family. But for both men and many women this stereotype is no longer so recurrent. From this, there is a great lack of understanding between the sexes.

Clearly, after spending years in a relationship with someone, we start to think that maybe it was a huge waste of time dating to just end it all. Therefore, we often try to “keep” the person next to us, even if the relationship is no longer good for both of us. It is worth remembering that it is difficult for many men to make drastic decisions and, if he is not sure in his decision, he can avoid more serious conversations and prolong a relationship for convenience. There are, therefore, certain men who simply do not want to marry a certain woman, but find it very difficult to say this out loud.

In the 21st century, relationships are changing more and more. So maybe you have some observations on this topic that can be seen from another perspective. How do the men (and women) around you deal with relationships and marriage? Comment!


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