6 signs that your relationship is stagnant

Relationships go through several stages, in which different experiences are lived and different challenges are overcome. In these continuous processes of change in the relationship, the people who form it may have the feeling that it is not moving forward and that it is not growing with them. When this happens, we say that the relationship is stagnant.

Despite the desire to stay together, there are relationships that do not evolve or do so in the opposite way. to the individual development of each member. The question is, why does it happen? Are we necessarily facing the end of the relationship?

Knowing how to cleverly interpret the information associated with the state of the relationship is essential to be able to initiate a process of change, which always It begins by recognizing that there is something that must be modified. Therefore, below, we explain what are the main signs that indicate that your relationship is not moving forward.

1. You feel empty

Relationships project or sow the feeling of empty. It’s about that feeling that the relationship is no longer good. You may feel fulfilled in other areas of your life, however, when you think about your partner and the relationship you have, you feel like something is missing. Even if you don’t know what could fill that space, you are certain that the void is there, doing its thing.

Sometimes, this emptiness comes from the absence of meaning in the relationship. There is no horizon to walk towards and you wonder, what are we doing here? The lack of direction, of purpose, of meaning in your relationship leaves a void in it, because there is no plenitude, that which is the product of the direct experience of meaning.

The lack of direction and meaning in a relationship can cause a feeling of emptiness.

2. Couple plans are missing or they are not of sufficient quality

When a relationship is stagnant, the couple avoids making couple plans, usually because there is an unresolved conflict between them and they want to have minimal contact. Avoidance is a strategy to keep the discomfort of conflict away and not relive it when being close to the other person. This strategy is evident when you spend more time at work or with friends.

If your relationship is stagnant, you will notice how you have stopped making plans together. This type of avoidance worsens the situation and further stagnates the relationship, since the difficulties and obstacles that are keeping everything at the same point are not being faced. The best way to solve problems is to face them.

3. Absence of passion, intimacy or commitment

If your relationship is stagnant, you will notice how little by little the passion, that desire to be with the other, has faded; you will see how The intimacy, that closeness and connection between the two, has been diluted. You will also perceive that the commitment you previously had to overcome adversity and maintain a stable relationship is no longer as strong.

When the blockage is very marked, we can observe shortcomings in these three dimensions, however, it is not necessary for all of them to be present to maintain that the relationship is stagnant. Whether a component is affected or not depends on the causes or resistances that prevent the relationship from advancing.

4. A blurred horizon

Another sign that your relationship is stagnant is that you avoid thinking about a future together. Do you have difficulty imagining yourself in a few years with your partner? Do you notice that your partner avoids the topic of talking about the future of the relationship? Maybe you don’t have a hard time talking about the future, in fact, you may even fantasize about it, but your partner finds it difficult or diverts the conversation.

Not having a vision for the future is a sign that the relationship is stagnant because there is no pure desire to maintain the relationship long-term. So if there is no future, how will they know they are moving forward? How will they advance on the right path if they do not know where they are going?

If each member of the relationship is thinking about their future, but there is no shared future, it may be because the relationship is stagnant.

5. Individual evolution is divergent

A relationship is sustained by the joint contribution that both people make. If they go on different paths, it is very difficult for the relationship to advance and for it to remain stagnant, it is as if we expected a car to move forward when the rear tires rotate in the opposite direction to that of the front tires.

One person does not make up a relationship; this requires at least two people. The evolution and development that this may have will depend largely on the harmony between the couple, the communication and the support that both provide each other to continue motivating themselves to walk towards the future they have envisioned.

6. Frustration is the queen of the emotional state

If you both feel frustration or anger about what the other says or does, it is a sign that the relationship is stagnant. Generally, these feelings are related to dissatisfaction or discomfort with being next to the other person.

The continuous conflicts between the two can also make them feel frustrated, because nothing changes, even though they have tried.

Finally, it is necessary to clarify that just as one swallow does not make a summer, a single sign is not a sufficient criterion to say that a relationship is stagnant. This situation is the product of multiple factors that underlie the appearance of the signals that we have reviewed and others that have not been examined.

You might be interested…