60 mockery phrases to give that pin with class

You look better with your mouth closed.

I even try to be polite and contain my debauchery, but my face doesn’t respect me!

Before being unfaithful, remember that I can be too. And for me it’s easier, because while you’re looking, I just need to choose.

Passing by to remind you that your glow is oil.

Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.

Dating is like a job: there is a vacancy, we just need qualified people to fill the position.

There are people who are more unwanted than Monday and still find themselves.

Sorry if I’m late. It’s just that I didn’t want to come.

Nothing brightens a room more than its absence.

I’ll write your opinion down here, in my “I don’t care” notebook.

First lesson: you can’t fix stupidity.

I rolled my eyes so much that I got to see my brain.

All I know is that one of us is right and the other is you.

Life could have mute and block options, couldn’t it?

It’s very difficult to follow your train of thought since you don’t have any.

I don’t swear. I just indicate different places for people to go.

I’m resigning because I want to go after my dream job, which is not working here.

Life would be the same without you – or even better, I dare say.

I use debauchery because violence is still a crime.

I waited all winter so I could complain about the summer heat.

What is a queen without the king? Well, historically, better.

I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.

I’m not antisocial. I’m anti-stupidity.

Sarcasm is the secret language everyone uses when they want to say something bad to your face.

Colleague, let’s contemplate all possible meanings of the word “silence”.

I’d like to go out with you, but I’m not ready to date someone asshole yet.

Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.

Some people are like dark clouds. When they disappear, the day is more beautiful.

I hereby inform you that I don’t give a damn. Thank you for the advice.

I’m not bitter, you have a childish taste.

I loved the indirect you sent me, I’ll even enjoy it to annoy you more.

Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do this very often.

I don’t have enough energy to pretend that I care about you.

It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.

I’m not sarcastic, I’m just smart beyond your understanding.

You don’t need to repeat it, I was ignoring you the first time.

Friendship is like expensive branded clothes. Everyone has it, but few are true.

Garbage will be collected tomorrow. Be ready.

I can’t go out with you, I’ll be too busy doing lots of nothing.

Everyone has the right to be an idiot, but you are already abusing that privilege.

I have no enemies, I have angry fans.

The limit is credit card.

I’m busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

In my life I know who is light and who is gambiarra.

It’s a lot of fans if you think you have air conditioning.

Good taste is like hair: everyone has their own and some are born without it.

Tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you if I’m going or not.

Sometimes I look at some people and think, “There’s no way that was the smartest sperm.”

Find your patience before I lose mine.

If I offended I don’t apologize, that was my intention.

If it looks like I give a damn, please let me know. I don’t want to give the wrong impression.

Trying to find here where it says that I am obliged.

Does anyone know when the day of falsehood is celebrated? I have many people to nominate.

Rock bottom? I go down, drink water, go up and still bring water to quench the thirst of those who thought I was going to stay there.

Yes, I’m missing avoiding fake people like you.

I’m at that stage of life where if someone threatens to leave, I draw a map so they don’t get lost along the way.

My level of irony depends on the degree of absurdity I hear.

You know what would look good on you? A lightning!

My favorite out-of-home activity is coming home.

Choose a clown, expect a circus.