6 keys to recognizing a passive aggressive narcissist

When we talk about narcissism, we usually imagine a loud, outgoing person who wants attention. Although it is not an idea that is far from reality, narcissism is a broader type of behavior. In this sense, there is a form of narcissism that usually goes unnoticed because it manifests itself covertly. Therefore, it is important to be aware of the keys to recognizing a passive aggressive narcissist.

Thanks to his introverted nature and his tendency to isolate himself, others tend not to notice his behavior.. In this way, other people can continue to reinforce their behavior without realizing it and be subject to manipulation.

The passive aggressive or vulnerable narcissist

The term “narcissist” is used to talk about people with certain personality traits that tend to cause problems. It can also create conflicts in your social relationships and in other areas of your life. Among the features that we can observe are the following:

High sense of grandeur.Lack of empathy for others. Constant need for attention.

It should be noted that having narcissistic personality traits is not the same as suffering from narcissistic personality disorder. The latter is a more complex picture, although the features already mentioned are also present. Now, different Authors point out that narcissism is more than a trait, it is a spectrum. Thus, it is possible to distinguish different types of narcissism such as grandiose and vulnerable.

People usually only recognize the first one, as they tend to be extroverted and quirky; Meanwhile, the latter tend to be introverted, shy people with low self-esteem. For this reason, others often fail to recognize a passive aggressive narcissist. Even People may feel compassion for them and give them the attention they seek.

In this same sense, there is a hypothesis that narcissists fluctuate between vulnerability and grandiosity. Gore and Widiger (2016) published work in which they evaluated people with vulnerable and grandiose traits. In this way, they concluded that grandiose narcissists can have episodes of vulnerability and vice versa.

Signs to recognize a passive aggressive narcissist

Returning to the above, no matter what the case, narcissistic tendencies can be harmful to the person and their environment. However, the vulnerable narcissist tends to act covertly, and that is why it is advisable to learn to identify him. Not in order to point out or judge them, but to protect ourselves from their attitudes and perhaps help them.

1. Low self-esteem

One of the traits is low self-esteem. While both types of narcissists share this characteristic, they manifest themselves in different ways. While the extroverted narcissist expresses how great he or she is openly, the introverted narcissist does the opposite.. It is likely that these types of people tend to make themselves look less in front of others and appear insecure.

A study by Rohmann et al. (2012) on grandiose and vulnerable narcissism analyzed the characteristic features of each condition. He found that vulnerable narcissism is associated with low levels of self-esteem and high levels of separation anxiety. Consequently, a tendency towards emotional dependence can be observed.

2. Victimization

This behavior is related to the trait of low self-esteem and makes it easy to recognize a passive aggressive narcissist.

To gain the sympathy of others, They tend to position themselves as the victim in all situations. In addition, it is a mechanism that helps them protect their ego, since they do not tolerate criticism well. Therefore, seeing themselves as victims prevents them from feeling guilty or frustrated.

3. Verbal attacks

Something common among vulnerable narcissists is verbal attacks towards other people. It is common for them to try to insult others and then disguise it as a joke. This attitude is a way of sabotaging others, since they fear competition. If someone confronts them, they may resort to victimization to make others feel guilty.

4. They do not take responsibility for their actions

Another way to recognize a passive aggressive narcissist is by looking at their ability to take responsibility. We all make mistakes and sometimes it can be hard to accept the consequences, but doing so is a sign of maturity.

On the other hand, these types of people have marked difficulties taking charge of their actions. They will most likely blame others for their mistakes and refuse to do anything to correct them.

5. Introversion

People with these personality traits They tend to avoid social contacts and have an introverted attitude. The reason behind this is his fear of judgment from others and having to compete to be recognized.

By isolating themselves, they protect themselves from any possible criticism or challenge where it is necessary to demonstrate particular capabilities.

6. Envy

It is common for these types of people to belittle the achievements of others and claim that they do not deserve their success.. They could also claim that for one reason or another, they should have obtained recognition that others have obtained. These negative thoughts tend to predominate in the minds of those who are vulnerable narcissists.

Finally, it is important to remember that narcissistic personality traits are not the same as having narcissistic personality disorder. However, these behaviors could indicate that said pathology is present. Therefore, knowing how to recognize a passive aggressive narcissist can be key to motivating them to seek professional counseling.

You might be interested…