13 keys on how to act with an emotionally unavailable man

Don’t know what to do now that your emotionally unavailable man is back for you?

We’ve all been there.

It’s natural to be drawn to the familiar, especially if you still have feelings for it.

But he is emotionally unavailable and you are probably looking for a real relationship.

You better think twice before answering that phone call or agreeing to that second first date.

It may not be easy to turn it down, but difficult does not mean impossible.

It’s about a persistent man bursting your bubble of happiness and you won’t get anywhere without steadfast love.

Honesty is the way to go, if you ever hope to get there.

With this article, we will help you work on making that emotionally unavailable man finally leave all his problems behind. Or that at least you can move on.

13 Things You Can Do When A Man Is Not Emotionally Open

1) Activate his hero instinct

If you want to change your luck with an emotionally blocked man, you must activate his hero instinct.

Every man wants to feel appreciated and valued in his relationship.

Especially men who have a natural inclination to put up emotional barriers to the people they care about.

To win over your emotionally unavailable man, you don’t have to act like a damsel in distress.

You don’t need to dilute your strength or independence in any way.

You just need to find ways to give your man more of the feelings he craves.

This is the hero instinct.

A man’s inherent need to be more than just a friend, a lover, or a guy you turn to from time to time.

He will love to be your hero.

Who do you turn to first and who do you lean on when a negative situation arises in your life?

This triggers something very deep in men that lets their love flow out for you.

2) Be true to what you really want

Was he always too nervous to discuss whether or not marriage is in his plans?

Or any other important project that you want from a couple, how to start living together?

Things probably started quite casually between you and now you are at a crossroads.

But if you’re the kind of person who knows you want a wedding, kids, and a white fence, you need to be true to yourself.

Holding on to someone who won’t give you what you need after a year or two might not be your best option.

Don’t settle for someone who might be cheating on you, even if you feel like they’re the ideal person in other ways.

3) Have you had enough of him?

He is here again and you must decide if you will take him back.

This is a whole decision-making process that will depend on you.

But surely there is a reason why you are reading this…

You’re close to the edge of having had enough of this whole thing with him.

No one else can know when it’s too much for you; That is something you decide on your own.

But you must also know, that when you finally choose this path, you must follow it to the end.

Don’t go back or do things by halves.

If you really want this man out of your life, you have to do whatever it takes, no matter how hard it is.

Are you ready to end things with him once and for all?

4) Don’t be fooled by what they believe

It can happen that you start to doubt yourself, when he starts to tell you what he expects from a relationship.

Maybe when you think it’s time to move on in the relationship, he makes you think you’re desperate.

He tells you that he is not ready and that things between you need to slow down.

Every question you ask him to find out if what they share is going in the direction you want, he eludes you.

Perhaps you think that it is not the best time to ask these types of questions, or it is too soon.

The reality is that it is never wrong to communicate your doubts or thoughts. No one should make you doubt what you feel, do and want in a relationship.

5) Cut it completely

“You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep rereading the last one.”

If you have already decided that everything is over with him for you, then what you should do is get him out of your life.

Yes, completely.

Delete his number, delete him on all your social networks and do everything possible to cut off communication with him.

Don’t text him for nothing. Not a “happy birthday” text, not a “hope you are well” text, not even a reaction to her Instagram story.

It may be tempting to contact him again or let him contact you. You might even be tempted to go back (again, if it’s happened before).

But you have to understand that just because he’s back doesn’t mean he’s changed.

It will be easier for him and for you to avoid these temptations if you have lost all means of contact.

You can’t text him if you don’t have his number anymore, right?

Think carefully about every action you want to take related to it.

You will see that thinking about things for just a minute will give you enough clarity to know what you really want.

This way you will avoid screwing up and you will be true to yourself.

Keep him physically and virtually out of your life at all costs, because if he can’t communicate with you, he won’t be able to get back to you.

6) Tell him that his behavior is affecting your mental and emotional health

It can be very exhausting and difficult to stay in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable man.

You are the one who is doing all the effort and you can feel alone on many occasions.

Over time, depression can assail you, if things don’t start to change.

This is a consequence of the fact that your partner does not correspond to you in the same way that you do.

You put a lot of energy into your relationship, energy that far exceeds the reciprocation of the guy you’re with.

As time goes by, this will undoubtedly affect your mental and emotional health.

It could even affect you in such a way that you will begin to reproduce the behavior of your own partner.

7) Get rid of everything that reminds you of him

And this means everything. From his things in your apartment, to his photos.

Even everything in the “recently deleted folder” on your phone and computer.

You no longer need to see them to be reminded of him.

Also, don’t forget to purge your Instagram stories archive. Who knows when he’ll appear in that “on this day last year” feature?

And speaking of social media, don’t stalk him online either.

Hopefully, you’ve unfollowed it by now.

But if not, resist the urge to check to see what’s going on with him, or see if he’s already asked out that girl he said not to worry about.

“Out of sight, out of mind.” It’s what really works!

If you can’t feel its presence anywhere, it will be easier for you to forget that it exists.

8) Do not focus on the positive side

Love is truly blind, but you can use this to your advantage.

Focus on the negatives and blind yourself to the positives!

Stop thinking about how funny he is and start constantly thinking about how he can’t handle his own emotions.

The former is the one that can blind you and make you forget about the latter.

When you feel like getting back together with him, remember why you broke up and focus on that. Especially if nothing has changed.

Surely both are still the same people, and will fight for the same reasons.

Perhaps they can barely agree on where to have dinner.

Nothing has changed and that is why you cannot expect a different result.

Most of the time it will only lead to heartbreak and yet another awkward exchange of belongings.

I know it takes a lot of work to do this, because when you love someone, you love them “in spite of” their flaws.

But, the truth is that, in many cases, you are just keeping the defects in the freezer for a while, so that they reappear the next time they bother you. These things cannot be avoided. You have to face it.

Be honest with yourself and consider if you are willing to accept and live with those things that you do not like about him, if the answer is no, you know what to do.

It gets complicated, when someone really likes you. But you have to get it out of the bubble of happiness in your head, pricking it with the needle of reality.

9) Do not think that you can fix men

It’s okay not to be perfect. The truth is that perfection does not exist.

However, there is an unequivocal distinction between growing with someone and forcing someone to grow.

You both need to be equally interested in growing the relationship you share, says Allison Abrams, a licensed psychotherapist.

If a person is not willing to grow, because they are not emotionally committed to the relationship, it will not work.

Do not think that he will magically change for you.

It’s tempting to believe it, because you like or love this person.

Plus, it’s nice to feel like you’ve made a positive impact on someone’s life.

But it’s not you who should fix it, this is a process he has to go through.

He has to do it himself. If he does not want to change or does not take action on it, nothing will change.

You’re not a rehab center for emotionally unavailable men.

10) Stop getting excited and put your feet on the ground

It’s easy to daydream and cling to “maybes.”

“Maybe one day he wants to get engaged.”

“Maybe one day I can talk openly about our relationship with me.”

As sweet as these phrases may seem in your mind, they are just that: an illusion.

Think of it this way: You are watering a dead plant.

You expect it to grow, but right now it’s a dead plant. Unless you are a plant whisperer, it will always be dead.

You might expect it to magically come back to life.

But right now the chances are slim to none and become a dream, which may never materialize.

The same goes for men.

You can’t accept him as he is now and expect him to be a different person in the future, just because you want him to be.

Take things for what they are and stop watering the already lifeless plant.

11) Imagine a relationship with an emotionally unavailable man

Do a simple exercise, imagine a relationship with him.

I mean the true version of him, not how you would imagine him to be.

It represents in your mind, a long-term relationship, with someone who cannot be emotionally open with you.

How will you handle the conflict? How will you handle your emotions? How will you accept constructive criticism?

Being in love with the idea of ​​him is different than actually being in love with him.

So you have to deal with the real man. Not the one of your dreams.

It is not the imaginary man, that you have created in your mind. The one that can help you process your emotions,

But the real man, who can’t stand it when you cry.

Who won’t even tell you which outfit is better, because he doesn’t even look at it.

Understand that the relationship is not living up to your expectations and probably never will…