12 Signs You’re Obsessed With Your Ex And What You Can Do

After going through a breakup, it’s normal for some feelings, thoughts, and emotions to linger about your ex.

Whether you’ve been dating someone for 6 months or 6 years, the intimacy that goes into building a relationship and sharing your life with someone creates a strong bond.

One that doesn’t automatically break up, just because the relationship ended.

He is so strong sometimes that even after years apart you may think of him and suddenly he writes to you. It has happened to me.

It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re still in love with your ex, just because you shed a tear when a breakup song comes on during your drive home.

Neither, because you came back 6 months ago on his Instagram account, after four beers that prompted you to do so.

We are all human, and those kinds of moments are normal for almost everyone.

However, there are certain tell-tale signs that you are still in love with your ex, no matter how much you don’t want to admit it.

What’s more, if you are reading this article, it is very likely that you already know the answer.

But if that love becomes an obsession and the other does not want the same as you, it can be a problem.

But don’t worry, you’re not alone. You fell in love with him for a reason, and it’s normal if those feelings are still there.

This article will help you gain clarity to identify if what you have is an obsession with your ex and what you can do about it.

Then you can decide if you want to move on and forget about it, or try a relationship with your ex again.

12 signs you haven’t moved on yet and are obsessed with your ex:

1) You still think about him daily

Thinking about your ex from time to time is normal and practically unavoidable.

That person and the relationship they shared have long been renting space in your mind.

As much as you want, it is impossible to evict them, at the very moment that things end.

In the first weeks or months after a breakup, there is a lot to think about.

It is a healthy and necessary part that one must go through, in order to process the reasons why the relationship ended.

However, if many months have passed since the breakup and you still find yourself thinking about your ex and your relationship on a day-to-day basis, that’s a sign that there are lingering feelings.

2) You are looking for some way to keep him in your life

“I hope we can remain friends!”

It’s the classic last sentence after a breakup.

In a perfect world, we would all be friends with our exes, we wouldn’t be sent to work as adults, and there would be world peace.

Unfortunately, while that hope is there, it’s rarely a good idea.

If you’re feeling desperate to keep your ex in your life, it’s time to ask yourself:

“What are the reasons behind that need?” Do you still love him or is it an obsession?

3) You have emotional reactions when you remember experiences with him

You have spent months or years with that person, sharing experiences, creating memories and planning a journey together.

With all this information, it is inevitable that sentimental memories come to mind from time to time.

Conversations they shared, that trip they took together to the beach or the time they said “I love you” to each other for the first time at that concert.

Songs, movies, or even certain foods can remind you of your ex.

While some of those memories may never go away, it’s how you react to them that can be revealing.

It’s one thing, that you can never go back to that bar, where you had your first date, without thinking about him.

But something quite different, is if you walk through the front door and your eyes fill with tears or your heart races.

4) You compare all your potential partners with your ex

Every time you hook up with someone on a dating app or meet a new guy, you automatically size him up, comparing him to your ex.

You can’t help but get thoughts like “He’s not as funny as Pablo” or “They don’t play the guitar like him”.

It seems that none of these new people can match the qualities of your ex.

5) You wonder why the two decided to break up

You are doubting the reasons why they decided to end the relationship.

Perhaps, what felt like a deal breaker in the heat of the moment, can begin to seem like problems or obstacles that can be worked out together.

Now you’ve had time and space to gain a new perspective on what’s really important.

You think that the decision to separate could be wrong.

6) You constantly check their social media accounts

Without even being fully aware of the fact that you’re typing their name into the search bar, you find yourself looking at their profile within seconds of opening Instagram or Facebook.

You’re checking their updates every day, keeping tabs on what they’re doing, and most importantly, who they’re doing it with.

You’re reading every caption and story, wondering if any of them might be a subtle message for you.

You hang on to each post, because it lets you feel like you’re still involved in his life.

7) You are making changes in your life thinking about him

New haircut and new outfit. Ready!

Expensive new materials for a new hobby, which you’ll probably give up in three weeks, but which will make you feel better in the meantime. Made!

Making some changes in your life to change your routine and fill the void left by your former partner is necessary when you are going through a breakup.

This is independent of how you continue to feel about your ex.

But, if you’re making changes in your life hoping the news will reach your ex, it’s a red flag.

Or you may be making changes that you think would improve the connection you had with him, that is. a clear sign that you are still obsessed with the idea of ​​a future together.

8) He is still the first person with whom you want to share the news in your life

Whether it’s something exciting, like a promotion at work, or something distressing, like the death of your pet.

When you pick up the phone and want to talk to someone, the first thing that comes to mind is him.

Your former partner celebrated your good news in a super fun way and helped you process the bad news, making it more bearable.

Regardless of how long it’s been since you last spoke, you still want to share whatever it is with him.

9) You are jealous of anyone your ex spends time with

Seeing a photo posted on social media of your ex with someone else or seeing him laugh across the room with a new friend makes you sick with envy.

You find yourself wondering what they are talking about, what they are laughing at.

You are looking forward to being the one who is sharing that moment or joking with him.

Obsession alert.

10) You are not getting rid of the memories of the relationship you had

His shirt is still hidden in the back of your closet.

His half-empty cologne is still on a bathroom shelf.

Perhaps you have already returned things.

But you can’t bear to throw away the ones that got away along the way or weren’t deemed important enough to be returned.

You’re holding on to those items, because they symbolize your ex and you still can’t let go.

Even that slightly tattered heavy metal band shirt you used to hate.

11) You care about your ex’s opinion of you

Regardless of what terms the relationship ended on, you still want your ex to think highly of you.

When you make decisions, whether it’s something small, like learning to cook, or something big, like changing your career path, you find yourself asking yourself what their opinion would be.

12) You always mention it in your conversations

To reminisce about happy memories, or an opportunity to gain new information about what you are doing now.

The reality is that you take every opportunity to address the subject to your ex, when you talk to your friends.

And yes, even they have realized that you are still hooked on him.

They are no longer surprised how you manage to make any theme good enough to evoke it once again.

Your choice: get back together or move on?

Have any of the above signs caught your attention? Did they trigger a series of emotions in you?

Of course, love or nostalgia, but also confusion, sadness or even frustration are perfectly normal.

Now that you can admit that you have an obsession with your exwhat are you supposed to do about it?

As complicated as it sounds, there are actually two simple options.

If you still love your ex: Get back together or move on.

Think about the reasons for the breakup and how you feel right now.

If you broke up over something important, like cheating or differences in your core values, and the realization that you still love him comes with frustration and regret, moving on might be the healthiest option for you.

If you broke up over something smaller, or you can’t even remember exactly why you broke up, and every time you think of your love for him you get butterflies in your stomach, it might be worth trying again.

It will be opportune to contact him to tell him how you feel and see what his heart feels as well.