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12 Myths About Child Care That Should Be Put Away

Just as there are no perfect parents, there are no foolproof methods for parenting either. Children do not come with an instruction manual, and this makes it impossible to predict whether the way we educate them will allow them to fully develop throughout childhood and adolescence. In this context, the existence of myths and beliefs related to raising children is undeniable. In many cases, they do not have scientific support attesting to their short- and long-term effectiveness.

The team of awesome.club researched several child-rearing tips that are often repeated but don’t really work.

1. “It is necessary to hit or shout at the child to demonstrate authority”

Physical punishment is a method of dealing with children that continues in many communities. However, he is not efficient, and can cause trauma in the little ones. This type of posture only increases the distance between children and adults, making the latter act as judges to establish norms without the possibility of opening space for dialogue.

In addition to physical punishment, there are also verbal ones: many parents tend to use harsh words or loud speech as a way of disciplining their children. However, instead of helping to improve children’s behavior, such attitudes only make everything worse, tending to cause behavior problems over time.

2. “Parents should be their children’s best friends”

Just as authoritarian methods marked by physical and verbal punishment do not give good results, being overly permissive with children is also harmful because it makes it impossible for them to understand the importance of respecting the rules. Parents need to be seen as “models” for their children, so it is necessary for adults to educate in a way that makes it clear that life in society requires certain values ​​and compliance with certain norms.

3. “Making comparisons between siblings allows one of them to improve in attitudes and performance”

It is common to see parents believing that a disciplined child with good grades is more likely to succeed in the future. And by paying more attention to the child who fits this pattern and referring to him as an example to be followed by siblings, parents end up stimulating rivalry and separation between the little ones. The result of this is often behavior problems and family conflicts after some time.

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Yes, avoiding comparisons can be difficult, and it is recommended to keep in mind that each child has their own particularities and that not everyone will always manage to be the best in the class. In cases like this, the ideal is to value the strengths of each one, without directly comparing them.

4. “Good Parents Raise Successful Children”

There are parents who, in order to encourage their children to grow up and become successful adults, enroll the little ones in various extracurricular activities capable of honing their skills. However, the obsession with having successful children, who do well in everything they do, tends to make children unhappy, as they will be led to meet their parents’ expectations, without thinking about their own desires.

At school, students who are forced to achieve certain performance and develop in educational environments where competition with others is prioritized often suffer from intense fatigue and a feeling of frustration for not meeting expectations. In such situations, it is recommended to be able to identify the signs and establish guidelines to recognize the personal improvement of each individual.

5. “We should hide from our children so they don’t see us crying”

On certain occasions, parents create the need to pass an image of perfection, avoiding, at all costs, appearing vulnerable in the eyes of the child. However, it is important for the little ones to know that adults also have their moments of frustration or sadness. No feeling should be belittled, but channeled. Thus, children will understand that they can express what they feel when facing difficult moments throughout life.

6. “Keep children busy in many activities that do not contribute to education”

Extracurricular activities can be useful for the child to develop leadership and socialization skills, but it is also possible that the overload of tasks ends up contributing to poor school performance. It is something that especially affects young people who are in their final years of school and have family responsibilities.

During childhood, many parents enroll their children in various courses or workshops outside of school. But the exaggeration in the volume of activities tends to cause stress and anxiety. Children need some time to relax after studying. So if your child refuses to do a certain extracurricular activity, it’s best to talk about it and consider ending it or setting other priorities.

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7. “Sleeping with parents guarantees safety”

Although the custom depends on the reality of each family, there are advantages and disadvantages related to the lifestyle or health of the parents. There are those who think that sleeping with the child is useful for synchronizing sleep cycles. But if there are other factors, such as the baby’s sleeping position or the parents’ health, the ideal is to try other alternatives, such as keeping the child sleeping in the crib next to the parents’ bed.

Some studies suggest that those babies who sleep with their parents may have more difficulty falling asleep. However, this may be due to certain insecurities of the child in relation to the mother or difficulties in falling asleep on their own. In such situations, it is better to consult a specialist and carefully analyze the pros and cons of taking the child to bed together.

8. “You must not hold the child in your arms too much, otherwise he will get used to it”

Biologically, human beings are completely vulnerable in their first months of life. Therefore, the baby needs closeness to the mother to feel safe and protected against any threat. Physical contact favors the proper development of the child, in addition to giving them tools to recognize their parents among other people.

9. “It is necessary to force the child to drop the pacifier”

Prolonged use of the pacifier can cause deformations in the teeth and dependence, so medical advice is to remove it from the child from 1 year of age, avoiding offering it before 15 days of life. In certain cases, the process of abandoning the pacifier can cause a lot of trauma to the baby, a situation that gets worse when the parents lose patience or force the child to let go of the accessory.

In these cases, the ideal would be for each child to be able to drop the pacifier on their own. Some of them succeed, but others find it difficult. If this happens, you can choose to explain why it is better to stop using a pacifier or praise your child whenever he engages in behaviors associated with older children. Another alternative is to replace the pacifier with a cup with a straw, as this can improve hand-eye coordination and help eliminate the need for a pacifier.

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10. “The child needs to be very well wrapped up so as not to catch a cold”

The problem with excessively wrapping babies is the possibility of triggering a fever. After all, young children are not able to regulate their own body temperature. This also happens when the little one is kept in very hot environments. In such situations, it is recommended that the child wear only one piece of clothing more than the adults. In addition, in case of fever, it is necessary to remove the warm clothes to allow the temperature to decrease.

11. “The walker will help your baby start walking sooner”

Many parents use walkers to prevent the child from bumping into a wall or furniture while moving around the house. However, the accessory prevents the little one from picking up an object that piques his interest and even from crawling. And crawling is very good for strengthening muscles, also facilitating the process of learning to walk.

Another issue involving walkers is that they increase the risk of accidents with the potential to harm the child. And when not in the walker, your child will tend to have difficulty standing up, as they won’t find the support they need to walk safely. Ideally, the baby should develop naturally, learning at his own pace to sit, crawl and stand.

12. “Walking barefoot causes colds”

Contrary to what many people think, viruses do not enter the body through the feet, so there is no problem if the child walks barefoot. Illnesses such as colds spread through contact with secretions expelled by talking or sneezing, for example. Nor has it been scientifically proven that cooling the feet or other parts of the body causes colds. In short, the recommended thing is to maintain good hygiene habits to avoid contagion.

Do you also receive or have you received a lot of advice involving raising your children? Have you tried any method to educate children and encourage proper development in them? Comment!

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