When to go to the child psychologist?

All parents educate their children to the best of their ability. And everyone, at some point, detects difficult situations in this process, some even get out of hand. Sometimes they observe symptoms or signs that they evaluate as worrying and that is when they consider going to a child psychologist. Of course, not without first doubting whether taking this step is appropriate or not.

The truth is that there is nothing wrong with consulting, There is nothing wrong with going to see a specialist. and let him explore and evaluate the child.

If we don’t want to directly take such a drastic step, We can talk to other people who already know the little one and that they are used to dealing with more children their age. These people could be the preschool educator, the teacher or the pediatrician and they will be able to tell us if they also observe that behavior, if they see it as strange and if it is at their level of development.

What is normal at one age may not be normal at another.

If a 3 or 4 year old child has afraid, parents can talk to him, read stories or accompany them for part of the time between when the light goes out and the children fall asleep. If he is 10 or 12 years old and this fear persists, it is likely that we are dealing with a child with self-confidence problems, lack of autonomy and great dependency.

On the other hand, it is not the same for a 4-year-old child to disobey as for a 14-year-old adolescent to have challenging behaviors. At 4 years old it will be easier to correct him than at 14 years old..

What does a child psychologist do?

The child psychologist, in a first interview with the parents, will determine the reason for the consultation, They will offer you some guidance and assess the need to evaluate the child and establish a diagnosis.

If you deem it necessary, Then the intervention will begin with the parents, with the minor or with both parties, depending on availability and demand of the problem. On the other hand, other measures could be evaluated with the center, such as a curricular adaptation if necessary.

As a child psychologist, and according to my experiencence, In many cases it is simply a mismatch between the child and his parents. Parents do not see at a certain point what their child needs. They lose harmony with him and have, for example, unrealistic expectations, they demand too much from him or, on the contrary, they demand less from him than he is capable of. They don’t interpret his signals well.

The task of the child psychologist is to explain to parents the needs of their child, indicate their level of maturation and adjustment in personality and, above all, offer guidance.

The child psychologist takes care of the language, the ways of approaching the child, uses games and drawings as a means to learn about it and understand their cognitive functioning schemes.

Read Also: 10 ways to give love so they feel it

Then, I translate to parents and helps parents logically understand their child’s functioning (what happens to make them behave like this), providing them with strategies for their education, skills for managing emotions and guidance to modify the family dynamic if necessary.

When to go to the child psychologist?

Parents usually go to the child psychologist when:

The child displays certain behaviors frequently: disobedience, aggressiveness, obsessions, tics, fears, hyper-sensitivity, extreme shyness…There are problems in the nursery school: excessive crying, absence of language or play, lack of eye contact, etc.; at school: lack of concentration, learning difficulties, conflicts with classmates, isolation, hyperactivity or boredom… or at school.The child has physical problems without medical cause: stomachaches, headaches, vomiting, eczema, etc.The child undergoes a sudden change and inexplicable: from being active he becomes apathetic; from being happy he becomes sad, etc.The child seems not to be happy: He barely plays, cries about everything, has no friends, fears being alone, has sleeping problems, etc.Difficulties in family dynamicsnegative climate, anger or poor management of emotions. Sometimes parents ask for help in specific situations such as a divorce or the death of a family member.

If there are problems with the child, talk about it first as a couple, the parent team must be united. Express your concerns, frustrations, emotions and opinions. It may be a problem that only occurs with one of the two parents and the other can improve the situation. Children have the power to intuit everything, even their parents’ weak points.

Read Also: From love to hate, is there a step?

Children and adolescents emit signals

Sometimes it is important to seek help. When we have the feeling of being on the limit, of not being able to bear our child any longer, of starting the day with our heart in a fist, of losing control every day and of being afraid of doing something to him. It’s time to stop and seek professional help. The children give the signal and, when they go to the child psychologist, the change begins.

The first appointment that the psychologist proposes is almost always with both parents, without the minor. In the next, if necessary, the psychologist will see the child. Through evaluation through games, drawings and tests, an idea of the child, his maturity and development is formed. The psychologist will meet the child and his parents several times, depending on the case..

“One of the worst things you can do with a child is not take care of him”

-Javier Urra-

When it comes to problems with a teenager, it can be more difficult to bring them to the office. But You can consult with the psychologist without the child. At the end of the day there is always an interaction between parents and child. If as parents you learn to see the situation with different eyes or to face difficulties in another way, the situation at home improves considerably.

Acceptance of the child, management of one’s own emotions, affection, education with humor and calm are good allies faced with any situation in the family dynamic, and a child psychologist will guide towards learning new strategies from this dynamic.