When the narcissist sees you with another: Hidden reactions and how to protect yourself

If you’ve been in the dating world for a while, chances are you’ve come across various personalities, including the occasional narcissist. And sometimes we are able to dodge the bullet, but sometimes not.

So if you have been involved with a narcissist, but managed to get rid of him, the time will come when you start a new relationship.

And that’s when we wonder: What happens when the narcissist sees you with another?

Narcissists can be charming and seductive at first, but as the relationship progresses, they reveal their true self-centered and manipulative nature. The truth is that dating someone like this can be emotionally draining and affect your self-esteem.

However, when you decide to walk away and find happiness elsewhere, the narcissist may react in unpredictable ways. Something that characterizes narcissists is envy, so if they see you with someone else, it may not feel good.

In this article, we’ll explore the things you can expect to happen when the narcissist sees you with another, and provide practical tips to protect yourself and move on with your life.

9 reactions when the narcissist sees you with another

1) Cyber ​​stalking

You may not be aware of this reaction, or perhaps you are, but the truth is that as soon as the narcissist finds out that you are with someone, he will want to know everything about him.

You will start a silent investigation through networks or other platforms where you can find any information you consider useful.

For them the race to be the best never ends, and seeing you with someone is a renewed opportunity to prove their superiority.

Practical tip: Try to keep your private life as private as possible, this way you will avoid possible unwanted intrusions on their part. In the end, the most important thing is how happy you feel and not that others see it.

2) He will feel angry and seek your discredit

When the narcissist sees you with someone else, their ego is threatened. Anger is probably the first thing he feels. To him, you can’t possibly have gotten over him and forgotten.

Despite being confident and arrogant before the world, they have a fragile self-esteem, so seeing you with another will make them feel their self-esteem is threatened.

For this reason, he may react angrily and try to discredit you in front of others. They will not mind doing anything to destroy your image and reputation.

It’s very important to remember that these tactics are simply attempts to maintain control and do not reflect your true value as a person at all.

Practical tip: Stay calm and don’t get involved in their game. Do not respond to his taunts or defend yourself at his level. Just keep your attitude mature and focused on your own personal growth. Surround yourself with friends and loved ones who provide you with emotional support during this process.

3) He will try to win you back

Although it may seem counterintuitive, the narcissist may try to re-enter your life when he sees you with another. His main goal is not to win back your love, but to maintain his dominance over you and satisfy his ego. Since he sees you out of his league, he feels useless and worthless and will need to reverse it.

If he decides he wants you back, he will use all kinds of manipulative maneuvers, from crying, swearing that their relationship was true love, victimizing himself, bombarding you with messages, empty promises, and desperate declarations of love.

Practical tip: Don’t fall into the illusion trap. Remember that the narcissist has not really changed and that his interest is based solely on his own benefit. Stay firm in your decision to move forward and block any attempts at unwanted contact.

If you go back to it, you will most likely find yourself with the same reality, the lies, the psychological abuse and everything that made you leave it in the first place.

4) He will behave as if you are cheating on him

As ridiculous as it sounds, a narcissist sees their own reality. You have probably tried to leave the relationship on good terms and with clear boundaries.

But if he sees you with someone else, he may feel like you’re cheating on him, even if you’re apart.

This is only because he feels that he loses control over you and that makes him desperate, he can’t stand feeling that he stops dominating you and your life. He will play the role of the victim and will do everything possible to make you react.

Practical tip: Do not respond to his accusations, or try to reason with him. As we mentioned earlier, they create their own reality, and any attempt you make to converse in a mature way will end in false accusations, further arguing, and manipulation. Better save yourself the trouble and just let him believe what he wants, believe me, indifference is one of the things that drives a narcissist crazy.

5) He will try to sabotage you emotionally

The narcissist may try to undermine your new relationship by planting doubt or mistrust in your mind.

They may send ambiguous messages, innuendos, or malicious rumors to undermine your happiness.

Practical tip: Maintain open and honest communication with your current partner. Be transparent about any sabotage attempts you may experience. Build trust in your relationship and don’t let the narcissist sow seeds of doubt between you and your partner.

6) He will get jealous

Instead of seeing you as a person with their own emotions and feelings, the narcissist sees you as their property. When he sees you with another person, he will be jealous to see that another gets what is rightfully his.

Practical tip: Beware of possible apparitions, or chases online and in real life. Talk to your partner and if necessary report any behavior that makes you feel insecure.

7) He will feel morbid and start a manipulative flirt

Seeing that you are happy with someone else, the narcissist may try to seduce you again to continue feeling that he has power over you. They are not interested in relationships, but in what they can get out of them.

He will use his charm and manipulation to create confusion and draw you to him once more.

Practical tip: Recognize the narcissist’s manipulative pattern and stay alert. Set clear boundaries and avoid any contact or interaction that could lead to a relapse. Keep the focus on your current relationship and the personal growth you have achieved out of the narcissist’s reach.

8) He will try to manipulate you financially

If the narcissist had access to shared financial resources or assets that must be separated, or if you are still financially dependent on him, he will use this as a means of control. They may threaten to withhold money, property, or financial benefits to try to exert power over you.

Practical tip: Evaluate your financial situation and take steps to protect yourself and divide your interests as soon as possible. If possible, consult a financial professional or lawyer for advice on how to protect your financial assets. Reduce your financial dependence on the narcissist and seek financial independence.

9) Could make threats of self-harm or suicide

In some cases the narcissist may resort to threats of self-harm or suicide as a tactic to emotionally manipulate you and win back your attention and compassion. Nothing matters more to them than achieving their goal, and if that’s you, they won’t hesitate to make you feel fear, guilt, or whatever it takes to get you to react.

Practical tip: Take any threat of self-harm or suicide seriously, but don’t become their savior. Contact your local emergency services to report the situation and provide them with the necessary information. Make sure you take care of your emotional well-being and don’t feel responsible for the narcissist’s actions.

Remember that each situation can be unique, and it is important to trust your intuition and seek professional support if you feel overwhelmed or in danger.

Conclusion

Despite the difficulties you may face when the narcissist sees you with another, this situation can also be an opportunity for your personal growth and healing.

By freeing yourself from the narcissist’s toxic influence, you will be able to rediscover your worth and learn how to build healthier relationships in the future.

It is a time to spend your time working on yourself. Seek therapeutic support if necessary and participate in activities that promote your emotional and mental well-being.

Take this experience as an opportunity to build your self-esteem and set healthy boundaries in your current relationship.

Remember that you deserve a healthy and balanced relationship, and don’t let the narcissist hurt you or meddle in your life again. Keep going, prioritizing your well-being and personal growth.