What does it mean to be yourself?

“Be yourself”. They insist on this message to us constantly, almost since we came into the world. Our parents, teachers, our best friends and even the world of technology tell us. marketing and advertising. In fact, we even wear t-shirts with that phrase. However, What does it really mean to be ourselves?

The truth is that we have become those types of people who have no doubts when it comes to defining themselves on their social networks. However, we use generic and hollow definitions to express who we should be, but we rarely describe who we really are. And we don’t do it because we don’t always know. Also because we live – in most cases – dominated by external conditioning.

We want to fit in. We aspire to be part of the environment that surrounds us. We need to be liked and accepted, and this need detracts from our authenticity and even psychological well-being. Thus, in a society almost always accustomed to pointing out those who think, feel and act in a unique and different way, it is incredibly difficult to dare to be ourselves in all our essence…

Being authentic is a journey that lasts a lifetime and in which we must invest effort every day.

Being yourself means…

In many of the films, series and books aimed at children and young people, they are urged to discover their authentic self. They are heroes and heroines who break the mold, luminous characters who, due to their unique characteristics, always emerge victorious. However, when the boy or girl looks out into the world, he discovers that he has been scammed. The reality is very different.

reigns the kingdom of selfie and filters, resources that, from very early on, get them used to showing a false self. Adolescents learn that to integrate they must imitate others. So “be yourself” is nothing more than an empty mandate that looks good as a phrase on Instagram, but it is better not to put it into practice. And this is where the problems arise.

When one seeks to dilute oneself in external conventions without connecting with one’s essence, one suffers. Young people feel increasingly pressured, overwhelmed, anxious and empty. They create characters and narratives to which they fit by force, like a shoehorn. Then, life becomes so stressful that anxiety, eating disorders, self-harm arise…

Revealing our true self is a challenge in this world where digital, online happiness and appearing unparalleled beauty and attractiveness through filters matter more. It is necessary to make a change, start a revolution in which to start being yourself. Let’s see how.

Being yourself means exploring who you are and accepting yourself.

Being yourself means looking inward. We are so accustomed to looking at, admiring and even imitating others that many have become social automatons. Maybe it’s time to become a little myopic to rest our eyes on what is close to us: ourselves.

Let’s discover what defines us, what situations, experiences and sensations make us feel good. Let’s turn a deaf ear to what is expected of us and listen to our inner voice. Maybe he has many things to tell us. Let us accept each of our nuances and singularities, because in the essence is the truth, our authentic being.

Being you means taking risks

When you finally dare to be yourself, you leave fears aside, as well as shame and insecurity. A lifetime of silencing who we are hurts more than revealing at any given moment what we feel and need. This requires courage and large doses of self-love, but the effort will not only be worth it. Happiness will be worth it.

Research by Guler Boyraz and colleagues at Louisiana Tech University highlights an interesting point. People who are always more authentic show lower levels of stress and greater psychological well-being. Therefore, If we want to have a fuller life, let’s dare to be ourselves in every moment and situation.

Authenticity requires deactivating negative internal narratives

We are all the product of our education, our experiences and the culture that surrounds us. This means that we have integrated clearly counterproductive thought patterns and perceptions. An example of this are all the narratives related to physical appearance with which we are educated. (too fat, too thin, too short, too tall…) as well as the comments about our worth and skills (You are not good for this, don’t even think about studying that…).

Let’s detect these negative perceptions in our internal dialogue and transform them. Let’s replace them with strengths, let’s get in touch with our potential, virtues, dreams and needs and focus our attention on those most positive areas.

To be yourself you must accept your virtues and defects. You are your strengths and also your vulnerabilities.

Being yourself means always working on your best version

Our identity and our inner self are a multifaceted dimension. They are made up of many faces: some are brighter and others are a little grayer. We are not perfect and that imperfection also integrates and defines what we are.. However, being yourself means working every day on our best version, always giving the best of ourselves.

This also implies Never impose on others who we are, what we want and what we like. Respect is key. Authenticity is celebrating that each of us has our vision of the world and that we can all coexist.

If we strive to be better every day, to take care of ourselves, value ourselves and those around us, that coexistence will be fuller.

Practicing vulnerability is also celebrating who you are

There is another decisive element that we should practice much more. To be myself I must also show my vulnerabilities. This is somewhat complicated, it’s true. There are areas of ourselves that we don’t like or are afraid to reveal to others. We don’t do it because we are afraid of receiving criticism or, worse yet, of being misunderstood.

However, To celebrate who we are with full authenticity, it is good to be honest. Reveal fears, yesterday’s wounds, frustrated dreams and even chronic illnesses. If we all did it, maybe we would discover how incredibly similar we are; Many masks, filters and falsehoods would fall to embrace us in a more authentic, simple and meaningful way.

It’s worth a try. Being yourself is a difficult task in a somewhat frivolous world, however, every effort will be worth it.

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