Wedding planners reveal signs their union will last a long time

At first glance, the work carried out by wedding planners may seem to us just a set of funny cases that only occur in the movies. But in real life, everything is much more complicated. There are even specific courses for those responsible for organizing these ceremonies, which deal with, among other things, financial management, notions of gastronomy and decoration and…psychology applied to marriages. Yes, this is not exactly a surprise, as thanks to this training, and in combination with professional experience, organizers are able to make very accurate predictions about how long a given union will last.

O awesome.club reveals what criteria wedding planners use to identify those unions that are doomed to an ephemeral existence. In addition, we compared the opinions of professionals with those of family therapists. Thus, you will be able to check whether the predictions made by specialists in wedding ceremonies coincide with reality.

In the process of talking about how to prepare the ceremony, wedding planners often focus on what the future spouses call each other. Diminutives and nicknames are not always a sign of a long and happy marriage. No wonder, offensive and demeaning terms to which couples resort even when they are facing strangers, are often a sign of a non lasting relationship🇧🇷 When insults come hidden under the phrase “I say it with love”, the future marriage will certainly not be an example of optimism.

Scholars confirm that beautiful family nicknames can be signs that something is wrong. Insults, even jokingly, reveal a contempt that not only does not go away after marriage, but can turn into aggression over the years.

In some cases, all the details have already been resolved, but one of the bride and groom tries to impose their own wishes hidden from the other, even demanding that the organizer keep it a secret. It’s one thing to ask for help making a pleasant surprise (for example, when the groom wants to sing a song he wrote during the party), and another is when one of the members of the couple asks for something that will clearly make the other uncomfortable (like failing to send invitations to certain relatives of your “better half”). This kind of intrigue only contributes to a quick end to the marriage.

Psychologists claim that having secrets is normal. However, when these secrets violate the couple’s rights and duties, it is simply a lie, which will only generate mutual distrust. And that does nothing to strengthen the relationship.

Wedding planners find that men are often less interested in details than women. Often, they don’t care about the color of the tablecloths or what the base of the cake will be made of. However, some grooms are usually present to discuss these matters, supporting future wives. And when one of the future spouses is not involved in anything related to this preparation process, it creates an awkward situation, to say the least. According to the organizers, there are cases where they only meet the bride or groom on the wedding day itself. For this type of couple, professionals in the field predict a short-lived union.

According to psychologists, marriage is always a two-person job. If all responsibility falls on the shoulders of a single person, the end is obvious: it will be impossible to achieve happiness and well-being only at the expense of one’s own personal effort.

According to wedding organizers, cases when the newlyweds argue when choosing music for the first dance really exist. Even the smallest details can turn into a big fight. There are people who cannot converse civilly, preferring to make scandals with the right to tears, insults and broken dishes🇧🇷 In many wedding ceremonies, you can even notice the constant tension between the newlyweds. For example, when that song that provoked the argument plays, one of the grooms may even roll their eyes and refuse to get up to dance with their partner. The inability to yield to solutions in a marriage can grow to increasingly destructive proportions.

According to psychologists, commitments are an indispensable component of an alliance that intends to be lasting. Therefore, learning to consider each other’s needs and desires is fundamental to a good marriage.

In some cases, during solemn speeches, the witnesses do not even mention the friend’s new spouse, and the mother of the groom or bride, openly and in front of all the guests, says that her son or daughter could find someone better . But that’s only half the problem. Newlyweds don’t have to please every guest or relative. A worrying symptom is that situation in which one of the members of the couple cannot or does not want to defend the other, protecting you from such attacks. Or even worse: when one of the bride and groom supports the attacker or begins to justify himself in front of them.

Experts advise to dialogue with the possible causes of scandals. Doing this in advance greatly decreases any possibility of situations like this happening.

Sometimes, a (supposedly) innocent glass of wine to calm the nerves before the ceremony turns into a veritable alcoholic marathon, with endless strong drinks during the wedding ceremony. Most of the time, it’s the bride and groom’s friends or parents who fall for this. However, it is common to see that the newlyweds themselves, or just one of them, abuse alcohol before the celebration. The organizers consider that this cannot be seen as a misunderstanding that “can happen to anyone”. Here, a reason arises to reflect on the couple’s prospects for a life together.

Psychologists advise not to forget about the most important thing: that a person chooses his future spouse on his own. Therefore, before the wedding, it is worth getting to know each other in depth to avoid possible surprises or unfulfilled expectations that he or she would change after the union became official.

The large debts incurred by the newlyweds in organizing the ceremony can turn into a real disaster for the young family. It is better that the costs fit the possibilities. If a loan is made for the celebration, the installments must be paid without causing damage to the well-being familiar. Otherwise, the debt will overload the young couple who, instead of enjoying their honeymoon and planning to build their family, will end up arguing a lot, complaining about the money that was spent “in vain”. This type of union usually ends even before paying the last installment.

Often, financial problems end up becoming an obstacle for the family. Therefore, the budget should always be seen as something capable of influencing the relationship, at any stage of its development.

Do you think it’s possible to guess how long a marriage will last just based on the ceremony? Leave your comment!