Did you know that many of your arguments can be resolved with just a simple conversation? That’s why it’s totally important to know some alternatives that can help the relationship between you and your boyfriend/husband (wife).

In today’s post, We brought you a very important technique, which will help you to resolve any conflict in the middle of an argument between the two of you:

How we usually express ourselves during an argument

We usually use these following phrases:

“You do not love me”.
”Again arriving late“.
“You didn’t do what I asked you again.”
“You always do it”.
“You don’t help me at all”.
“You’re tiring me.”
“You never…”,
“you always…”,
“you always have to…”,
“Because of you…”.

The result of these sentences is that the conflict gets even worse!

Did you notice that in all these sentences there is the word “you”? According to some experts, these expressions are called “messages you”.

This type of message only serves to provoke conflicts, because sound like attacks and provoke a defensive reaction in the form of grudges and reproaches.

Use the magic word “I…” again, and you will see positive results instantly.

“I was worried because you weren’t answering the phone.”
“I would be very happy if you did”
“I’m angry because I’m tired and I feel helpless”
“I want you to listen to me.”
“I’m tired of being alone.”
And finally, most importantly: “I love you”.

But then, why does this work?

It is absolutely important that you use the “messages me” all the time. Even during an argument. The secret behind this is that you talk about what you’re feeling, rather than blaming your partner.

So instead of using reproofs like, “Again you didn’t tell me you were going to be late”, use “I worry when you don’t tell me you’re going to be late”. That is an invitation to dialogue, in which everyone can express their opinion.

Read Also: Regardless of what happens, I will be with you!