The forbidden attracts us

Since ancient times Human beings have always been attracted to what is not within their reach. It seems as if what is forbidden takes on a halo of irresistible attraction for us. Deep down it is a manifestation, let’s say almost natural, that people have to kill curiosity and conquer freedom.

From the moment we are born, moral, ethical and social limits are imposed on us. Since we are children, we are taught what we can and cannot do. It is the parents, who first mark that path and delimit those red lines, which we cannot cross. Then society continues adding limits to that list of prohibitions.

Our own condition as human beings is what pushes us to experience what is denied to us because we need to know the unknown and evaluate its consequences. We transgress the rules to feel their consequences “firsthand.” It is the only way we can voluntarily repeat or renounce prohibited activities, whether or not they are really harmful to us. As Oscar Wilde pointed out “the only way to overcome a temptation is to let yourself be carried away by it.”

THE CHALLENGE OF REACHING THE FORBIDDEN

When something or someone is presented before our eyes with the forbidden sign, it immediately seems as if our most adventurous side is activated to achieve that challenge.. What is banned seduces us and attracts us. If we take a look at our daily lives we can find multiple examples that confirm this maxim.

It is enough that the doctor has prohibited us from consuming a food for it to become the most palatable; A book arouses our interest if it has been censored for some reason; A person attracts us the more he has a partner or presents himself as an impossible love. It is clear that when something is prohibited, our mind decides to pay more attention to it than usual.

A study carried out by Columbia University reveals that the desire for something forbidden decreases when we renounce it in a group, that is, it is easier for us to respect the limits when we do it in a group, than individually. These findings could improve group therapies to help people overcome certain habits and addictions.