The biggest risks of running in a relationship

Going too fast in a relationship can sometimes mean rushing us into the void of regret. Because sometimes it happens, love captivates us at a given moment and soon, passion blinds us and drags us to the point of turning the emotions into anchors that lead us adrift and without a clear direction. There are always exceptions, of course, but rush is not usually a good friend.

The need to go through stages in an emotional bond can cause, for example, a couple to start a life together a week after meeting each other. It also happens that you decide on a marriage, to formalize that love at first sight in a few months. Some even culminate this passion with the birth of a child. Later, many of these impulsive decisions turn into disagreements.

Being right or wrong depends on multiple factors, such as age, experience, the personality of the partner, emotional abilities, and psychological maturity. Love is an adventure in which sometimes we achieve a wonderful common project and other times we commit one more failure from which to learn. Either way, There are always consequences that we should foresee.

We analyze them.

11 signs that your relationship is going too fast

Before analyzing the consequences of going fast in a relationship, let’s review what are those signs that can help you know if you are going too fast.

You are convinced that your partner is perfect. There are many exaggerated romantic gestures from the beginning. You have not recovered from your recent breakup. You have met his friends and family before you felt comfortable doing so. You ignore your needs and your friends. You have no limits. You ignore the differences between the two. You like the label more than the person, that is, you love the idea of ​​having a boyfriend more than your boyfriend itself. You lose your own identity. You can’t go an hour without sending them a message. text. You make great plans with that person.

Now that you have the tools to recognize if you are going fast in your relationship, let’s delve into the consequences of this relational speed.

What are the consequences of going too fast in a relationship?

There is unwritten advice that reminds us that when it comes to love or sex, the slower we go, the better. However, this is never easy to remember or control. The fever of falling in love sometimes leads us to jump into the void without a parachute, to advance stages without first thinking about whether we are perhaps being too impulsive.

For example, studies such as those carried out at Cornell University (New York) show us something interesting. In a sample of 600 couples, it was evident that those who had moved very quickly in their relationship, such as, Having sex on the first date and starting a life together after a few weeks or months did not always have good results..

The rate of subsequent ruptures was high. Obviously, there are exceptions, but on average rushing does not bring happiness or stability. Let’s know, therefore, some of the consequences of going too fast in a relationship.

After falling in love, we discover that there is no love

Falling in love is a feeling injected by passion, desire and attraction. There are effervescent relationships, those that captivate us due to their intensity, sexual pleasure and the pleasant feeling of being in love. However, after a short time all that effervescence subsides and calm, everyday life and routine arrive.

That’s when we discover that beyond passion… There is no love. There is no solid alliance, the affection that threads everyday life and the magic of simple things. We discovered, almost surprised, that we do not share the same valuesthat it is difficult to reach agreements and that there are not even coincidences in future plans…

Who am I sharing my life with?

Attraction, passion and infatuation apply an extraordinary filter on us. Everything shines, the other person shines in absolute perfection and we project onto him or her a thousand virtues, hundreds of skills and kindnesses. Now, one of the consequences of going too fast in a relationship is that, as they say, there comes a day when that filter is deactivated and we see the other’s reality without pixelation and without golden layers.

Suddenly, we wonder who we are sharing our lives with. That person who is next to us is not only a stranger, he is someone who does not harmonize at all with what we are and what we expect from an emotional relationship.

That relationship was a way to forget another past (and unhealed) relationship.

Sometimes, that need to burn through stages, to speed up times and make that unknown a constant in everyday life responds to hidden needs. There are many who start relationships to forget other past relationships that were painful. Liana relationships (linking one couple after another) have this competence.

Likewise, there is another obvious fact. Going fast makes everything intense, those effervescent emotions cover up past pain and, for a while, almost everything feels cathartic. Nevertheless, In the end, that day comes when said relationship stops patching the wounds of yesterday to make the present a new meaningless thing.

Too much intensity is taking its toll on you

Another consequence of going too fast in a relationship is emotional intensity and focusing attention, almost exclusively, on the other person. The thought focuses on the other obsessively, Only the relationship matters, everything we do is oriented towards him or her, the emotional level is always intense, overflowing, addictive…

Finally, It is common to suffer psychological exhaustion and perceive that we are forgetting about ourselves. themselves.

Going too fast in a relationship: things you didn’t know about that person

Accelerating the times in love can cause us to overlook aspects that are often decisive. From one day to the next something unforeseen can arise that leaves us baffled. That person may believe in open relationships, in polyamory, and may have more than one partner in parallel.

Likewise, it may also be the case that they are a person with some type of addiction or that they simply carry with them complex family problems that they had not told us about. All of these are situations that we do not always see in the early stages, therefore, we always It is better to be cautious and prudent when deciding next steps.

To conclude, it is true that each person is free to decide how fast they want to go in an emotional bond. However, to avoid irreparable disappointments in the future, it is always appropriate to be very clear about who we are with. Going slowly is sometimes wise and much more rewarding.. Let’s think about it.

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